Can quiet, shy people become very outgoing and social? Do you know anyone like that?

Is it possible for someone really shy and quiet to become very outgoing through practice and being more social?

I'm tired of being afraid of talking to people. I want to... but I just hesitate.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • yes they can. Myself, for example.
    If you're naturally shy you can work on becoming more outgoing. Will you ever be extremely outgoing/social? No, can't go from one extreme to the other. You can get better relative to where you currently are, though.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • I've never watched a person go from shy to social, but I've seen completely crippling shyness go to simply not speaking unless she has something to say.

    (Seriously, my best friend used to cry when she had to stand and talk in front of the class. She got sent to the principal's office multiple times for this.(Why, I was never quite sure.) Now, she has no problem speaking in front of people, she's just quiet most of the time.)

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What Girls Said 11

  • I was actually extremely shy when I was younger. Up until about 3 years ago I never really spoke much. Now I don't shut up. I was tired of being the "shy" and socially awkward girl. So I changed and became the person I wanted to be. I've made a shit ton of friends and people now consider me to be the "life of the party". Apparently people think I'm really funny.

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  • I used to be very shy and quiet. Because of a job I started to open up more and I became a lot more outgoing and social. It started out because that's what the job needed so I pushed myself out there but it changed me from being as quiet and wallflowery.

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  • I did. I was always shy and in many ways still am, I simply don't allow it to manifest into something people can see now more often than not. I just learned how to talk intelligibly and began imitating confidence, before I knew it, it became natural.

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  • Yeah, they can. I do, me lol. I was so shy in school I barely talked to anyone but once I hit my late teens I became very outgoing and social, and still am. It was a complete 180. the best thing you can do is just put yourself in social situations. Getting a job that forces you to be outgoing really helps too. Are you just a little shy or do you have social anxiety?

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    • I don't know what it is with me... I have no issues talking to people superficially. When I used to work at a very busy coffee shop in a vegas casino (the venetian), the guys would always put me on the register cause I'd get the most tips. I was really friendly, social and kind.

      I have real trouble connecting on a deeper level. When my brother introduces me to some of his friends, I can't do it. I can't talk to them, I don't want to talk to them, I don't want to share about myself. I'd rather not meet them. Same thing happens when talking to romantic interests.

    • Aww. Do you think there's like a subconscious reason? Since superficially it's okay but it's the deeper level you're having a little trouble with? Like maybe you're scared of getting hurt by people or something?

    • Maybe... I dont know

  • I was extremely shy to the point I'd freeze up on front of people! I just kept putting myself outside of my comfort zone a little bit at a time and with practice it helps. Good luck :)

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  • Yes, they can. At least more outgoing and confident, considering that shyness usually stems from lack of confidence. How social they become depends on if they're introverted or extroverted.

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  • I believe that it could happen. But it will probably take a lot of effort. Especially since you've been that way for so long. I'd say start out small. Maybe start going more places. Spark up a conversation with someone.

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  • Its possible. It happened to multiple people that I know.

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  • Working in retail has helped me greatly in this department.

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  • I hope so :/

    I feel like a lost case.

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  • yup! i know a few guys who changed after becoming teens

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What Guys Said 4

  • You're are 25-29. If you aren't a social and outgoing person at this point in your life you will never be. Just learn to accept it man.

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  • Shy people don't have to be shy all the time. Some stimuli can bring out a hidden extrovert in them.

    Tends to happen to me at anime conventions at times. And even had a time where I went to a fetish club. Was quite invigorating.

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  • I am like this around people I am not familiar with, I am shy and keep my head down but around people I know I am much more outgoing and sociable.

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  • no, but shy people into adulthood for no good reason are dopey and less than.

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