If a friend of yours died in a drug overdose, would you blame them, the dealer that sold him the stuff, or friends that influence them badly?

A classmate of mine passed away Monday night from a heroin overdose. in a way I kind of blame her for what happened because she did know the consequences of her actions, but decided to act on it anyway and gamble with death. I also blame bad influences on family too her mother was a drug addict and a bad influence on her she had just moved back in with her mom. I also blame the dealer who sold her the stuff who really didn't care if she live or die just wanted the money.

Updates:
@justbanannaz @Paris13 what would you say personally?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Probably a combination of all three. I personally don't understand the fascination with drugs considering they have an array of negative affects on you, so I would think them stupid for doing them and being around bad influences who did them, but I would hate whatever dealer who gave her the instrument of her demise.

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    • I would too but she made her own decision now she's having to live with the consequences

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    • Thanks for the MHO! :)

What Girls Said 13

  • Thank you so much for asking me for my own advice @smahala1991 I was out last nite and just now saw this.
    I am so sorry for your sad loss and I would have to agree with you on this one. However, we are Old enough to make our own decisions, and if someone is this influence on our own actions, it is a matter of getting caught up in something that led to her own demise because she had a drug dependency and no one cared enough in her Family to get her any help, who also had bad issues.
    You can shoot the messenger all you want but we make our own decisions when we know right from wrong and but when you have a bad addiction, you are in a bad environment that is wheeling and dealing and joining the Jones, you can end up a lost soul Yourself, being Involved when you Need help yourself but can't get this help because either no one cares to help you or you don't Care enough about your own self to care.
    Your friend just caught up in a bad deal that ended up a raw deal in the end.
    Good luck and my blessings. xx

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    • Thank you sweetie for the upvote.. I recently lost a friend of mine with suicide when she decided to end her life with alcohol which poisoned her. She had so many issues, got help here and there, but never enough when she may have thought no one cared and had nothing to live for. xx

  • If we're adults we're ultimately repsonsible for our own decisions. We're also human and there is nobody who has never made a mistake. Sometimes people from difficult backgrounds can turn things around for themselves. Sometimes people who seem to have everything make poor choices. Either way, nobody wants to have a drug addiction. Yes it was her that took the drugs, but consider what drove her to it. From the outside we can say she chose drugs each time but if she didn;t perceive it to be a choice then that really doesn't count for anything. It is always difficult when soemone we love hurt themselves and that makes us angry and upset but we're angry and upset because we care.

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  • i would probably blame everybody. but mostly the person who enabled them to do it.
    its not easy to blame people, but its only human.
    my cousin died two years ago from a drug overdose and i really just blamed him. but when you blame someone who is dead, you feel kinda guilty so you put the blame on others... even when we know its the deceased's own fault for making the choices they made.

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  • Thats really really sad, I hope you're ok!
    I don't think it's possible to blame one person, there are lots of contributing factors, I mean yes you could say it's partly her own fault because it's only her who decides what she does to herself, but we don't know the situation that made her turn to it...
    It's a very sad thing all round and trying to find blame isn't the best way to dealing with it, but acceptance that it happened instead.

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  • You know who the actual person is who is responsible for introducing drugs to her in the first place? Her family. So I blame her family, it's not her fault. Some people are more weak than others and do not have the right guidance in their lives to change. Instead of blaming her, I would try to do something so I could help people in her place try to come out of this state.

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    • I blame whoever got her hooked to. But we all control what we do and don't do in life and she chose to listen to those people and she chose to do what she did and that's a direct consequence she paid the price for it

    • Of course she made the decision which eventually led to her passing away but the thing is we do not know why she continued doing drugs. She could have been depressed, and was not able to seek help. We cannot just say because someone died from a drug over dose that it was their choice and they were stupid. No one knows what goes on in the others mind and we have to consider that too.

  • I would blame the person who overdosed. Literally everyone knows hard drugs are addictive and everyone knows you can die from an overdose.
    It's sad that they are putting their family through this, but it's no ones fault but themselves

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    • Yes I feel sorry that they passed away but however the circumstances surrounding up I do not feel sorry for because they chose to do what they did and really should have known not to mess with that stuff I'm just sayin

  • oh gosh I'm sorry to hear that. it's not in me to blame someone who's passed away but i would feel that the person could have made wiser decisions to avoid leading themselves to such a horrific fate.

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    • I really don't want to myself but she knew the consequences of the actions and sadly now she can't take back what happened

  • I would blame the person that died. It nobody was forcing them to take it. Then they did it out of their own free will. So meaning they didn't care if the drug they were doing killed them.

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    • very true. It's like what Newton said: "For every action, there is an equal or opposite reaction"

  • All of the above but primarily him. People need to accept responsibility for their choices.

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  • That friend only

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  • All three of them.

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  • Everyone is responsible for their choices. It's so terrible though.

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    • Like I have said I do feel sympathy that it did happen. But, it was her choice to do what she did and I can not feel sympathy for her doing the drugs knowing that there were other ways to fix the problems besides dying or drugs

    • I do sympathize with her actually. It doesn't sound like she's had the best influences in her life... It's a really sad way to die.

    • she had a good grandmother from what I've heard that raised her then the grandmother had a bad stroke so they sent her to live with her mother in Charlotte and her mother from what they said was a very bad influence on her.

  • It's her mothers fault. A child will follow her mother. It's the moms fault for not getting on her

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What Guys Said 13

  • I say it's their fault being they control themselves. Everyone is influenced by others just due to the fact we see others do different things but that doesn't mean we follow in their foot steps. I'm sorry about the loss of your friend but this was a choice they made. Had they not got the drugs from one person it would have been another

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  • All of the above it's all their faults really her fault for not being smarter and safer, the dealers fault for selling her the stuff and not giving a damn about her and her friends and families fault for steering her towards the stuff in the first place.

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    • Yes heroin is one of the most dangerous drugs out there. She really should have stopped and thought about things before she went and did it

  • I'd blame the person who overdosed themselves on drugs.

    Nobody forces them to put drugs in their body. -_-

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  • In the immediate delusional panic following the death of my friend, I'd blame pretty much everything, including myself and them.

    A few months or years later, I'd consider it and realize it was their own fault, but that wouldn't make me feel any better about it.

    Even if my friend killed themselves with a drug overdose, that wouldn't mean that they weren't my friend. They are still dead, and that's a tragedy, especially given that all of my friends are under the age of 14.

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  • Lots of people overcome bad influences. It was her choice, not anyone else's. No one forced her to take it.

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  • I wouldn't put blame on anyone, it's a tragedy.

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    • Yes but she knew better and the dealer was only out for money

    • Exactly, she did know better so why did she do it? You don't know her life and what she was going through for her to take the heroin to begin with. If her life was all rosey and perfect she most likely would never had gotten into that mess, she was a victim of her own life. The drug dealer was just doing his "job", it's like being mad at a lion for eating a gazelle. If she didn't get her heroin from that drug dealer she would have gotten it from another dealer. Why put the blame on drug dealers though, why not put it on the suppliers, or the distributors, or the failed drug busts, or the politicians, or the people that elected them into office... get my drift?

  • I'll let Dustin Hoffman say it for me;

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s77-hPY1-Jk

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  • the friend for being weak. i know it's harsh but drugs/alchohol are pathetic and stupid

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  • I'd blame them

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  • him. i dont get how people blame others~! its irresponsble to do that

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  • you can take a horse to a river but not force it to drink

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  • Can't blame anyone he chose to do that

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  • I'd blame the drug

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    • Yes, but what about the person who took it, they were well aware of the possible reactions

    • That's someone I would blame, as well. I would less blame the drug dealer, because these people knew what they were getting into.

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