Was my childhood experience normal or abnormal?

I was raised pretty well for the most part and had two very loving parents but as a child I remember being very sad sometimes in a way that in retrospect seems unsettlingly adultish.

For example sad songs made me cry. I used to watch The Land Before Time as a kid and the closing song made me cry almost every time and filled me with an indescribable sad feeling. (The song Beautiful Mess also made me sad for some reason, among many others. )

I also focused a lot on things like people being mean to others even in small ways or violence and greed and it made me feel guilty and sad even if I wasn't doing anything wrong, just thinking about or witnessing such things made me feel very guilty. I saw things like CSI as a kid or even cartoons with violence and I'd see a violent scene and think about it for days. I even remember some scenes over a decade later because they stayed with me. I would imagine bad things happening, like a cat getting run over and it would make me cry like crazy but I couldn't stop thinking about it sometimes.

I just saw the world the way it is and as a kid I think that kind of damaged me but I'm not sure if my experience is completely out of the range of normal. I would cry randomly and my mom said it must be hormones even when I was 6/7 years old.

I first thought of suicide in kindergarten and I know that's not normal...

I'm just thinking about this now because I feel as if I perceive things differently than most people and think differently and it is a source of a lot of grief in my life.


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What Girls Said 1

  • I'm sorry. I didn't realize kindergarteners thought of suicide. That's awful! 😞

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    • Yeah I feel like I never really had that blissful childish ignorance.

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    • No not at all

    • Agreed!

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