If you were honest, have your parents damaged you in any way whether it be blatantly with an obvious flaw , or inadvertently?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • i'm not going to say they damaged me per se. they just instilled... a lot of anger in me lol. i can't really remember a time when they weren't constantly fighting and yelling at each other. i resent my mom for not having the guts to leave my dad. and i resent my dad for being so selfish. but individually, my parents are good people. so it's hard to hate them completely and blame them for all my problems. i think they just really made a bad impression on me about relationships/marriage. i'm very reluctant to trust people because i've seen how the people closest to you can cause the most damage. at the same time, their stupidity has driven me to be very successful so that i never have to depend on anyone for anything.

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    • I can relate to this for I can see a lot of lingering resentment in my three children towards me because of how I was, or wasn't

      I am sorry for you having to deal with this :(

    • it's aright. my parents did more right things than wrong things... and that's what matters :)

    • Still, for your kids you want to be perfect

What Girls Said 10

  • Oh yeah. I'm definitely damaged goods but I'm always working to improve myself

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  • Yes. Growing up, my mom had the most and sadly bad affect on me. I would confine in only her certain things about becoming a woman that I thought she automatically knew to keep to herself. But the next thing I knew, I heard her talking about to my (at the time) stepdad. I was highly embarrassed and felt that he would see and treat me weirdly. This went on for as long as I can remember. Another thing was believing what people said. My mom would promise a bunch of time, that she was going to take us to the park later on those days and it never happened.

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  • Both parents are narcissists. It was very difficult not to be able to receive empathy or feel any kind of security emotionally. Abuse, neglect, scary stuff.

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  • My parents, both of them, were always dieting always concerned about their weight. I never learned to eat like a normal person

    And my mom, when I was in elementary school and got a B in math whereas most my friends got an A told that it's ok because girls are often not good in math, she wasn't either and neigher was my grandma. I know she meant it well but it kept me from trying in math for years, and once I started trying again turns out I'm quite good at it

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    • We have such an effect even subtly, and we only realise after when it is too late :(

    • ya I mean you can't be perfect though. And I turned out alright so they did a good job overall. Most people screw up their kids in some way

  • I grew up as the fat, middle child. I think that answers the question. And if it doesn't, yes, they have. I didn't get paid much attention. And when I did, they were chastising me about my weight.

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    • I can relate, I think I neglected my two daughters with the lack of attention I showed to them in comparison to my son

    • Yeah, it sticks. This is why I don't feel that parents of multiple children should have favorites.

  • Oh yes, my dad the most. There were several things he did that messed me up. I'm not very good with my words so I'm not sure I would be able to explain it very well, but I'll just say there are things I just cannot forgive.

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  • My dad just really confused me about the world. And no I dont have daddy issues

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  • Maybe a bit emtionally unavailable.. I have problems expressing interest og affection towards anyone.. one of the biggest reason im single for sure

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    • i can empathise with this through the adverse affect I had on my children through my 'way'

  • Yeah I am very apprehensive of relationships because of my parents marriage. I do not think I am very lovable because of certain things my mother taught me. I am very scared of ending up like my mother in her marriage where she is desperate for someone to love her or stay. I never want to need love.
    My father was very aggressive when I was growing up and it made me nervous and anxious in a way that I still feel around men that I know intimately and I get nervous when they get angry or upset or get nervous of a man getting mad with me.

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    • I am so sorry to hear this. i had to face up to my 'crimes' as a dad when my son who I always saw as being so 'together' has had struggles with ICE because of strugghling in life :(

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    • Still very harsh on you

      ICE is a drug, messes you up bad

    • :( oh sorry to hear that

  • My father molested & raped me when i was a child and my mother was far too drunk or strung out on drugs to either care or notice...

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What Guys Said 4

  • Yes. My dad has a narcissistic personality disorder, and growing up with him around, some narcissistic traits have rubbed off on me. He would tell me how incapable I am and how clueless I am. How am I supposed to know how things of the world outside school are done, when all I knew was school for 19 years of my life?

    I am well aware of these traits and meanwhile notice when they are about to appear.
    Starting to talk only about myself without noticing or intending it for example.
    I sometimes still do this when I meet someone new to show that I am okay and a good person.

    A true narcissist has no other intentions to make someone else admire them and put you down to get this bonus too.
    A true narcissist gets very upset when he gets no attention or special treatment.

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  • My father impose his beliefs upon me and forces me to do what he thinks is good such as studies, courses or where I go. He also hit me a lot as a kid and humiliated me for being skinny in presence of relatives. My mom ( The person I trusted the most ) is a liar and I recently found out that she is hooking up with a guy she had been chasing after for 11 f***ing months. Life is not so bright

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  • Nope, my mum did a damn good job raising me. Looking out at others however, I think coddling your kids and protecting them too much makes them entitled little shits.

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  • They completely fucked me up... been in therapy for years.

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