Why are people shy? Don't they know they'll miss out on life if they don't try?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • the fear overpowers knowing they're missing out

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    • muchas gracias muchacho!

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    • dios mio :p you semi-rock. hehe :D
      adios mi amigo daƱoso. yo tengo sueno!

    • 🙈 that went completely over my head

Most Helpful Guy

  • AMEN!!!
    i stopped being shy at ur age Jared, 17 because I realized it was just not the way to live!! Miss out on everything good in life, great relationships, etc.

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What Girls Said 8

  • Fear. Fear of rejection, and judgment. Not everyone grows up receiving healthy positive stimulus. Fear comes from so many areas at a young age and it literally effects how you perceive yourself and how you think others will perceive you. Other factors that influence are media, advertising, peer groups... etc...

    The list is long but boil it down to the bottom and it's fear, rejection and judgment.

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    • For example, it takes one person to comment on your body and say you're fat. A hundred others can tell you your body is beautiful but it's that one comment that will replay in your head over and over.

  • I'm shy as fuck. I know I miss out on opportunities by being shy, but it's not something you can magically fix.

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    • But does being shy do you any good?

    • Regardless of if it does me good or not I still can't just change it. It'll take months or even years to work past it. I'm significantly less shy than I was in high school, but it's taken me 5 years to get here. It'll probably take me another 5 to not be considered shy at all.

    • Same problem here<

  • Because depression!

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  • I used to fear people. Now, I just hate people.
    I can be shy. I am trying to change that though.

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    • Hate is not good man. Take it from a guy that was bitter and full of hate for years, it's self-defeating.

  • It's not so much that... People have different reasons on being shy. For example, I'm actually really shy myself but once I get comfortable with the person I open up and I'm not so shy anymore. My reasons are just really difficult to explain. Lol

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  • Maybe some people don't see it as a bad thing, something they have to change. And those who do might not know how to change.

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  • It s not smthng they can control

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  • It's not a choice? How do expect people to be someone they're not?

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What Guys Said 13

  • You act like it's a choice. It's not. They are fully aware that they are missing out. That makes no difference whatsoever. Asking a shy person to not be shy is like asking a person to fly. If a shy person overcomes it, most likely they either weren't very shy to start with, or it took years to overcome it.

    There are shy people who can't overcome their shyness even to save their life, literally. They suicide because of it. If they really are that shy, very likely nobody even knows the reason, because they were too shy to talk about it. I'll take it a step further. I bet shy people have died because they are dying and are too shy to call 911.

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    • Not really cause people have over come shy ness people can't fly so that's a pretty crazy analogy

    • It's not a crazy analogy. SOME people overcome shyness. Some people can, but some can't. The point is that it's not always a choice. Some people CAN'T. They can't overcome shyness any more than they could fly.

      The problem is that one physically can't be done. The other is psychological, or maybe physiological, so it seems different. But to some shy people there is no difference, not in the sense of one being more within reach than the other.

      Maybe a slightly better analogy would be a person who is paralyzed. The mind tells the leg to move, but it doesn't move. Maybe you can identify a physiological reason for it.

      Maybe it's not as easy to understand a shy person, but it's very similar. The mind says to do something, and the body just doesn't do it. The reason, whether it's psychological, physiological, or whatever, is irrelevant in the sense that knowing and understanding the reason makes no difference in the end result. The end result is that the body doesn't obey the mind.

  • There's a difference between knowing stuff and actually doing something about it. Most people becomes shy from their experience, atmosphere, fear of rejection and constant rejection. Some may even argue that shyness is born within you and although it's easier said than done or to say that those people usually miss out on things, it's often hard to step out of your comfort zone, try something new, and be more extroverted and less shy. I used to be shy when I was around 12-13 years old, but throughout the years, I learned that the more you do it, the more you get used to things, and that I want no regrets. I don't want to contemplate of what should have been or could have been.

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  • lol people are shy because they feel anxiety. i'm pretty sure they're keenly aware of they're missing.

    i think what you mean is why are people introverted as in why do they prefer to read books instead of socialize when given an either/or

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  • FEAR AND SELF-HATRED! I'm shy as well but I think to myself why the F**K are you shy? Being rejected is nothing and not every girl will obliviously reject you. It happens then it's over. The thing is if I get rejected I replay the moment over and over in my head thinking what I did wrong or am I just ugly? That's a really bad feeling! I know logically being shy is STUPID! But my emotions and feelings over power logic.

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  • It's a psychological condition.

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  • maybe they don't know it YET*

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  • That's like saying to a deer "Dude, you would miss out so much less if you were a tiger!".

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  • I think shy people don't do this willingly.

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    • I know but can't you just say fuck it today I'm going to do what I want and not care what people think

  • You're mistake is thinking that shy people don't try because they do try and many fail and many fail again and again and no matter how hard they try, they fail and eventually they thrown in the towel.

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  • The world would be way too annoying if everyone was a loud ass extrovert.

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  • People don't choose to be shy. I used to be and I missed out on a lot.

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  • I'm going to miss out on a lot because it's something I don't see myself breaking out of, It's just the way it is "shrugs"

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  • yea I already missed out on something great earlier this year I regret it

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