I hate myself because of what I have been through in my life. I blamed myself and told myself it was my fault. I hate myself because of the years I have been emotionally abused and how I had no one to give me support and take me serious. I lost my voice it took just 2 years ago for my mom to witness the abuse I endured. She thought I was lying.
The sad part about this is it is by a family member who is an addict. He blames me for the abuse of course. He denied reality until I had a psychotic break 2 years ago which I recovered from in less than a year from therapy. He calls me bitch/cunt and every degrading name for a woman you can think of. I was told by my teachers I had a learning disability at a young age. When I could not function because of the constant abuse I endured as a child.
For years I have been bullied and called dumb at school and at home. For the longest time I could not figure out why I was so depressed usually it is one or the other you are bullied at! I do not allow anyone to bully me but I still have put up with the abuse until I hopefully move this January hopefully. People used to get frustrated with me at school and work because I could not follow simple instructions but it was because I could function due to the emotional abuse. I endured emotional abuse from age 3-25 years. I am tired of hating and blaming myself for someone else's issue.
I am cutting him off forever once I move out next month. This emotional abuse has already taken a serious toll on my mental health. I considered go to an abused women's shelter. But my mom who in denial about how bad the abuse talked me out of it. I wish someone in my family stepped and helped out but I have no family support. I have zero self worth.
If it gets any lower I will be more at risk for hurting myself. I almost became mute and I could not even make eye contact with anybody for years.
Most Helpful Guy
I think the first step to loving yourself is to look at yourself in the mirror and think; This is who I am. People look more on the negative of themself then their positive side. Compliment yourself once in a while and keep doing things you are proud of, instead of things you will regret.
I hope this is some sort of answer you were looking for, I have been thinking for a reasonable answer for 15 minutes now :P2
Most Helpful Girl
look yourself at the mirror and compliment yourself. Find something.
Then you'll start to believe you're beautiful1