Extremely, darkly depressed because I feel unintelligent and my life is leading downwards? Please help?

I am a 16 year old boy living in the Bay Area of California. I'm a Junior in High School and I get and got really bad grades both Freshman and Sophomore year and now Junior year (I got like one D last year and a few Cs and this year I got an F in math and 2 C and Bs and one A). My family, though really not trying, make me feel like I'm a dumbass and that I'm stupid and I don't know anything, which is not true, I'm intelligent, but I've just become sooo... depressed and unmotivated?

Every time I walk into a room all I think about it "I'm the dumbest one here and I'll never understand why."

The only thing I'm really confident about is my guitar and piano playing, I've always been very good at my instruments, but I feel like all this and what's happening is effecting that confidence.

Overall I just feel like that lump of burden for everyone in the family. My two older sisters are already almost done with college and seem to have their lives planned out and I'm here getting shit grades and not knowing what I'm going to do.

I'm sort of set on going towards Architect. You don't have to be too good at math (I've talked to many and it is the case) and it's a lot on creativity. It's still work obviously but I feel like it's something I'd love. If I ever brought this up, my dad would brush it aside and say "Have you seen your grades?" or something similar in French and I'd just go back to feeling worthless and thinking I can't do anything (I could just go to a CC and transfer, it's not over, but I'm a Junior and everyone still thinks I'm capable of nothing and it'll stay that way until CC).

Please don't think my dad is a super mean guy, I have a ton of bonding time with him, we do sports and play music together, but sometimes he's really just making this "depression" type thing much much worse. I could go on, but I'll continue if you're interested... it's long already and I'm guessing nobody is going to bother replyin


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Let me tell you something... were 16, we have no fucking clue what we want to do... and it's not fair to expect us to have our lives mapped out, were still basically kids... when you walk into a room and think I'm the dumbest one here, almost everybody who has walked into that room before you has had a similar thought, whether it be, I'm the fattest person here, I'm the shyest person here, I'm the ugliest person here, I'm the loneliest person here... we all go through shit days, weeks, even phases... but you will come out of it I promise you that... you want to be able walk into a room and be like I'm not the smartest here but I'm trying my best then all you have to do is try... work out a study timetable for work and try to stick to it, and kee up music... it's a life saver, it really is... when it comes to confidence fake it till you make it babe... I used to be so shy and I used to get a lot of shit for it, I used to put on a strong bitch face going into school and you know what, I have no problem walking down a hall in school with my head held high and a smile on my face now... your gonna look back in 10-20 years and say I can't believe I was so stressed, I should have just done my homework and enjoyed my teen years... so please understand that we're all going through the same stuff... if you wanna talk message me... sorry for the long reply😂

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    • This is really nice :)

    • Yea, I guess you're right, but I feel like I'm not good at anything, but guitar and being creative. I feel like I'll die in college and be on the streets or stuck in a shit job in the future

Most Helpful Guy

  • Depression is very serious business dude. Helping you by myself is totally out of my reach, but I do think you could use some therapy.

    Beware though, therapy is not going to cure you magically. At best it can be somewhat better than not taking therapy, but that's about it. There is NO known quick and painless fix for depression.

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What Girls Said 2

  • Trust me, sweetie, so many of us were going through the same thing at your age. Take it from a seasoned veteran. Life does get better.

    You can find something you love to do. If you're an artist, you could paint or draw. If you're a writer, you can start a journal. If you're an actor, you could read for yourself. You just need an outlet to vent your feelings. Talk to someone you love. Just don't give up.

    To be honest, I just figured my own life out, only two or so years ago. Life really does begin after 21, for many people because that is when you really start to find your way. If you need to talk, send a message. I'd love to help in any way that I can. You can get through this. You are stronger than you think! Good luck, hon! ❤

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    • I mean yea, I play the guitar, not to be cocky, but extremely well, I create my own stuff, but I feel like nothing will come out of it. Once I started driving, I was thinking of starting to play out in clubs and stuff a lot but I'd still need a group and no one here likes blues/rock stuff. I feel like I'll be stuck here forever.

  • If you want to be an architect, then go for it. Having a goal like that may be what you need to kickstart your motivation. I had a rough time my first three years of college and had no motivation, so I ended up failing all of my courses, even though I very easily could have made all A's. I was very depressed and contemplated suicide on many occasions. I stopped going to school and worked for a couple years and figured out what I wanted to do. Once I did that, nothing could stop me from achieving my goals. My parents didn't do much to help my depression, but going to a therapist helped me work through it. Think about your goals, think about what you have to do to achieve them, and go for it :)

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    • But I have like a 2.7 GPA in High School and I don't know where to go from here.

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    • Was that your gpa in college or in high school. And I already messed up my first junior semester badly with getting an F in a class and a couple Cs. I feel like I'm going to a CC no matter what. Not that it's bad but depression will be present units then it seems.

    • My GPA in high school was a 4.3 because all I did was study and I had absolutely no social life. My parents made sure my schoolwork was my number one priority. In your case, the good thing is that the only people that really look at high school GPA's are colleges. If you've already decided to go to CC, which is a great place to go, then you should be in if you have above a 2.0.

What Guys Said 1

  • Sounds like you need a friend. Message me any time man.

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