Worried I'm a sociopath (part two)?

This is part two. Please read part one if you haven't already.

-I have been diagnosed with anxiety disorders, but anxiety disorders and sociopathy can coexist

-I have been cruel to animals before. I have suffocated a fly with axe body spray (attempted to) because I hate flies and couldn't catch it. I kill flies for sport sometimes, whacking them with a newspaper gives me a satisfying feeling. I have pulled cats tails and yelled at cats before. I spray cats if they do something wrong, like playing with electrical wires. I tell myself I'm protecting them, but I wonder if I'm really just justifying it so I can be mean to them. I dumped a whole bottle of water on my cat's head when she was beating up on one of my other cats and enjoyed watching her run off and felt good about that. I think that is sociopathic. Overall, however I think I like cats and felt extreme grief after my old cat died (but that could be manufactured). I also have extreme anxiety regarding the cat being safe. The same is true for my family.

-I have done something illegal before. I did not know it was illegal. I feel deep shame and guilt thinking about it but I worry those emotions are manufactured. I still haven't told anyone, nor do I plan to. I justify it by saying the thing I did only hurts me (that is true) and some things are better kept to oneself. It won't come up in my future either.

-I used to get people to give me money for snacks. I was up front, not manipulative, but seeing people as sources of money is still sociopathic.

-I have thoughts of grandeur- being a famous author. Leaving a legacy. I would like it if one day I really excelled in a field. This is common with Sociopathis apparently.

-I used to sneak cookies when I was younger.

-I have lied before to get what I want. I always come clean. When I come clean there is risk of punishment but I still avoid the initial consequence by lying.

-I

Updates:
I have said I would commit suicide before. I believe I truly felt that way, but maybe I was just manipulating. Needless to say, I didn't. I have said very mean things before to family members. I feel guilty about that, but that could be manufactured. I give false info when signing up for accounts on websites like google. I hate large companies and it's satisfying to get one over on them when I don't want to give them my info. I don't know if this is sociopathic. I didn't think so. I don't know
When reading about shootings in the news I used to feel said. Now they are so commonplace that I don't feel that much- perhaps anger. I hate ISIS and other people that make people's lives miserable, but the feeling is more anger and sadness. That being said, I reacted to hearing about the paris attacks.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You feel guilt and shame, you are not a sociopath. Sociopaths lack empathy for others and abuse other's with no remorse.

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    • Couldn't a Sociopath have manufactured guilt and shame to help them fit into society better. According to someone on another site (I know you can't believe everyone but still) Sociopaths can learn how to empathize and form a shell so they act entirely normal but just don't feel guilt and remorse.

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    • That's how I feel about it as well. I certainly wouldn't want to interact with a Sociopath and if I knew a friend was a Sociopath I'd probably end the friendship, but they are victims of circumstance.
      You've helped me a lot. Thank you.

    • No problem, thank you for MHO.

What Girls Said 2

  • Okay listen. It's great that you have noticed it and took it in regard. You have faced the fact that you might be a sociopath.
    With therapy and counseling it is possible to change this kind of behavior especially since you are still young.
    You have the chance to start over and become someone who isn't all those things.
    The past does not define you.
    So I recommend seeking a therapist or a counselor.
    If you are in school check to see if they have any programs (usually they are free) and go and speak to someone.
    Write down all the things you've noticed about yourself that you didn't approve and show it to the counselor.
    Keep note at to what you want to change about yourself.
    Good luck!

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    • There is no cure for being a Sociopath from what I've read if I am one, I am for life.

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    • Oh. Sorry for misinterpreting what you said, I guess I'm just really paranoid.
      I find villains to be interesting characters, but I don't empathize with them at all. And I do feel emotions and empathy.
      I'm in therapy for anxiety. I've taken diagnostic tests and haven't met the criteria for Sociopath (my concern is that I lied) so I can't really work on those issues with my therapist, because it isn't clear that I have them. I think I may just be paranoid. I'm working on my anxiety about it though.

    • Yes most likely being paranoid. Just try to have positive thoughts and smile a lot.
      They say fake it till you make it. So keep being a happy and caring person and one day you may actually feel that is real. :)

  • If you're worried about it then you're not one

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What Guys Said 2

  • Not a bad sequel. Don't ruin your legacy with the final part of the trilogy.

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    • Please take this seriously. I posted on this site because I thought people might answer seriously.

    • I think you need to relax and not focus on this shit, you entertaining the idea of it is what's causing you problems. Just do your thing, be a good boy, and learn to get along with people.

    • Fair enough, thank you for responding

  • No, I don't think you are.

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    • Thank you for the input

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    • You may be a sadist, but you can control your urges as long as you still have a sense of right and wrong.

    • A sadist. I hope not.

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