Does anyone get depressed about the state of the relationship between both genders these days?

It can't be just me that gets pretty disillusioned looking at all the anger directed at and attempts to troll the opposite gender online. It's almost a political battle where both 'sides' are competing to be the bigger victim.

Honestly I've just been put off by the whole idea of relationships looking at all that crap.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • This is an interesting question.

    However, I don't think that what a person sees on the internet is immediately representative of what goes down in real life; the internet has no /real/ repercussions, just the looming threat of unfriending or blocking.

    The reality of the matter is that there will be unbalanced folk as well as balanced ones, just don't date the unbalanced, nutso ones. A few bad eggs shouldn't scare you off the concept of dating altogether! Perhaps you need to be looking at different websites.

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    • "This is an interesting question."

      Thanks!

      "However, I don't think that what a person sees on the internet is immediately representative of what goes down in real life; the internet has no /real/ repercussions, just the looming threat of unfriending or blocking."

      I really hope not. You're right, but it's still kinda sad that so many think that and don't act like it irl only because of the consequences.

      "The reality of the matter is that there will be unbalanced folk as well as balanced ones, just don't date the unbalanced, nutso ones. A few bad eggs shouldn't scare you off the concept of dating altogether! Perhaps you need to be looking at different websites."

      You're right tbh. I've met a few good people here though. I'll try more moderation.
      Thanks. :)

Most Helpful Guy

  • Well the people who pick sides in the "gender war" typically are single and miserable for a reason, such as picking a side in "the gender war" and being fully opposed to the other gender whom they intend to date.

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What Girls Said 28

  • Not really. The only place I see much, if any, anger against either of the genders aside from those crazy feminist rallies are online.

    I never hear much issue between genders in rl. My relationship has always been fine, as have those of my friends', aside from issues that come about as nothing new or specific to 'gender wars'.

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  • Yeah, I just came from the MGTOW side of YouTube lol. I agree with some points they make, but the whole idea that women are inherently manipulative and incapable of love is just really depressing to me. Someone said that the only reason women go into relationships is to control men and I was like wtf. Before that, I came from a "feminazi" type video where I realized that women can be incredibly insensitive to the issues men deal with instead. It just seems to me that we're so invested in our own pain as a gender that we forget to look at the bigger picture and acknowledge the experiences that both men and women go through.
    Feeling a lot like this atm hahah:
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUFT35S7Jb4

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    • its true. I've seen many of these videos

    • Show All
    • A lot of guys have been through multiple, horrible situations with women myself included. The thing is to remember they are not all like that, although it seems like there are a lot more lately.

    • I feel like the girl in that video quite a bit actually. :P

  • Not at all. I know there are awesome guys out there and those are the ones I'm interested in so the MGTOW/MRAs/generally angry guys don't bother me.

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  • I think the state of the relationship between genders is better than it was. There may have been less internet trolling (because there was no internet), but the genders have never had more in common, more equality, or more respect for the other than they do today. People can also marry for reasons of true compatibility and love for the first time. In previous generations, pregnancy, sex, and economic necessities were the primary drivers of marriage. Not saying these can't be true today, but it's often in addition to finding the right partner.

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    • Logically you're right but based on the divorce rate, marriages are hardly better for it.

    • Well that's because people are no longer forced to stay together out of stigma, social backlash, and economic necessity. And yes, a lot of that comes from women gaining their equality, but I don't think that's such a bad thing, no? We don't want people to stay in marriages because they literally can't survive without their partners. It holds everyone accountable. Men for a long time were taking their wives for granted, having affairs and the like, because they knew their wives couldn't leave. Now we're on an equal playing ground.

      This is not to discount the number of people who ignorantly rush into marriage, or who don't take the commitment seriously and bail at the first hardship. I agree that we're in a divorce crisis, I just don't think blaming gender equality is the right answer.

    • You're right. It may be a cause but it is better than the alternative. It's just a little sad that marriages have become so meaningless.

  • I couldn't care less about silly gender battles on the internet. I have a life outside this website where things are way more peaceful and happier. I don't see even half of this bullshit in real life.

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  • Definitely. I've been bullied by members of both genders though. Bullied for 'being a feminist', for 'not being a feminist', for 'hiding my feminazism behind a mask'... things are crazy out there. The struggle is real.

    And I have absolutely nothing to do with it. I just go about my day. FML.

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  • I'm in that boat. Coming from a failed marriage.. it's difficult to think of going back out there. It's frightening in fact. I don't care to date around either. I enjoy people, and getting to know new people. However, once things get into a more emotionally connected area... I feel a sense of dread. I think most of us want our needs met, and when you have a different vision, it seems to go awry. I think men are great... but growing up I didn't have much of a male presence around me. My family was made up of many strong women. The men seemed to be in the background somehow.

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  • It doesn't depress me but it does definitely concern me. It has also put me off of relationships.

    Wanna date? Lmao,

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  • Kind of. I mean, I rarely see it in the real world, but it does exist. I see it much more online, but I don't really take it that seriously, because it's mostly bitter, butthurt people having a bit of a whinge about the boy/girl who rejected them. I mean, rejection sucks, sure, but it's not really the fault of all men/women that you got turned down a few times. And I know they know that, so I tend to ignore the desperate pleas for attention and vindication.

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  • i never come across this hatred in real life. ONLY on GaG. I don't know why this is such a breeding ground for resentment. maybe all the haters never leave their houses. who knows.

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    • It's over most of the Internet afaik.

    • it's all over in real life, it's just hard to get people to talk openly about it. I usually try to when I get the chance, not in like a pushy or rude way just make some light hearted non threatening comments and see where people take them. More often than not the men I talk to have pretty much the same opinions you see online.

      The difference between the internet and "real life" is that people feel free to speak their mind online.

  • It's really sad, can't we all just accept that we are human and it doesn't matter what your gender, or skin color, or sexual orientation, or your nationality. That we are all just humans trying to get through this sucky thing called life without going entirely insane.

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  • Honestly this stupid internet shit does NOT translate into real relationships and it's mostly only on this website. I mean yeah when I see all these hate posts about women it sucks knowing so many men hate us so much but there are also WAY more who do not. Don't let the losers on this site discourage you, there are great people of both genders!

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    • Thanks. :)
      Women seem to rant about men far less and men seem more likely to be bitter. Part of me is (selfishly) more worried about the 'bad eggs' among women though.

      You're right though. It seems much worse online.

    • Yeah it's blown way out of proportion online

  • Yes I do ):

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  • Not depressed. I'm fine with it. That means the human race will die off quicker.

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  • have u seen this on other websites other than gag? Usualy the guys who are into this are a lot meaner about it but mayb its cuz in real life they dont knwo where to express it. And maybe the website being called "Girls Ask Guys" and vice versa sounds like girls vs guys lol There are a lot of nice people on here too, its just the minority can be loud. the loud ones who are still nice I do empathize with more

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    • I agree. I've seen it on most of the internet; at least the parts of the internet I look at.

  • No, they're just a vocal minority that like stirring things up. Go back and look at how many positive things are said for every negative one.

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  • no because I have a great relationship and pretty good examples around me as well :) So I have a positive outlook. I am from belgium by the way my boyfriend is from Denmark. I only fell in love and had sex for the first time at 28 with him tho so I am definitely not like a regular girl :P Also I am his first.

    And I never notied much of a competing between genders, maybe on certain online places but other than that I dont notice it.

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    • Good for you. :)

      I've never been in a relationship so I saw all the negative stuff before the positives.

  • I don't really think about it tbh

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  • Meh, I guess 30 percent of the time.
    I'm not that interested in dating these days, too much controversy and unwritten rules

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  • Yes "it's a sad sad state of affairs we're in".

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  • That mostly happens on the internet... that creepy place where unstable people seem to gather D:

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  • Lol I don't care about people on this website. I'm rarely on here

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  • I see these battles online but I don't think about it too much. I like men and women are great too. Dunno why they need fo fight when their relationships are what makes humanity keep going,

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  • I think the issue is more sexual than anything.

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  • I only see that nonsense online. In the real world I know plenty of good guys. I surround myself with positive people, not ones that try to drag others down. I know location can be a factor, but I've traveled around and see men and women coexisting peacefully.

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  • It's mainly just online. In real life, you do still hear this crap here and there, but it's nowhere near on the same scale.

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    • I think that's mostly because people keep their real opinions to themselves in real life in fear of backlash. I think there's less bitter people in reality than the internet makes it appear but way more bitter people in reality than reality makes it appear.

    • @MyMintFrappe it's just on certain sites even. Sites like this for example attract a lot more of that type, some other sites attract different people. Sites that are all about relationships and stuff, they're usually used by a high number of people who are unsuccessful, bitter, angry or all three, so you'll see more of that talk. Normal sites have a much different outlook and more positive talk.

  • I am too. When will people realize that being the "victim" isn't the role that you should be proud of playing? They should know that only when you accept reality for what it is, and take responsibility for yourself, you go places in life.

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  • Online world isn't like the real world. People do t get online to talk about how great things are, so it has a negative bias.

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What Guys Said 24

  • I don't think anyone is competing to be a victim. It is very much a political battle. I do think men do need to become politically active about men's rights as it is very much an issue. I think there needs to be a meeting in the middle to move society to a place where things are fair and equal for both genders. As I see it men and masculinity are being destroyed. I don't get depressed by this stuff. I accept reality for what it is and deal with it accordingly. I too am put off by relationships. I don't blame you for being so. How could you not be?

    I definetly think you can blame feminism for this. Men are fed the F up myself included and finally fighting against feminism and a society that treats us as expendible. When we're at a point where feminists and those that support their agendas are saying if a guy has sex with a drunk girl it's rape but say nothing of a vice versa situation or if their both under the influence we have a major problem. Lowered inhibitions are not the same as taking sex by force against ones will. Pleanty of people hook up at bars and clubs and both parties are under the influence. 2 people having sex under the influence isn't rape. When equality means women working law enforcement and military jobs and positions as men do, but with lower qualifying standards for those jobs and still calling that equality something has to be done. When guys are being forced to pay child support in some cases where the child isn't biologically his something has do be done. When women can have a restraining order placed on a man or a man jailed on false domestic violence charges which will destroy his life and are not held accountable something has to change. When masculinity is shamed and society is expecting men to be feminized something has change. When people run around saying stuff like "happy wife, happy life" there's a problem. What about the husband being happy? Oh that's of no concern right? A man just damn well better do as his wife commands or there'll be no sex for the rest of the month. Men should just get back to work supporting their ungreatful wives and better do as she says lest she divorce you, take the house, kids, car, 1/2 your business, 1/2 your pension, child support which is well over what the child actucally needs and leave you pennyless and living in a shack, then complain about an imaginary wage gap. I don't know of one company that has a different pay scale for men and women for the same job. There is no wage gap.

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  • yes. i m getting closer to not marrying anymore. I've seen woman leave their man and intolerant of him when he's down way too much.

    i also dont get how they have the right to take half of you're lifes savings. at any point for whatever reason, she can divorce and take half of my shit. this is why women dont marry poor or broke men because they do marry for money and lifestyle and won't allow themselves to fall in love with just for love.

    women today are living in a fantasy more than ever and are disloyal through empowerment and privilege more than ever. i m gonna bend my back just to gain their trust and build a relationship only to give them all the power to ruin me if they can't control me? or just because her feelings went away she's entitlted to half of my lifes work? is this why society places them on a pedestal?

    its slim. women aren't women anymore.

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  • Not depressed, but I don't like this fight to be better than the other. We don't choose our gender, it's not our fault, we shouldn't be fighting over something that makes humanity more beautiful, diverse and even fun.

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  • Nah not really because all that matters is the relationship between me and the women in my life be it my girl and or female friends.

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  • Women suck
    Men suck

    We all suck, and neither Feminism nor MGTOW isn't helping us work this shit out

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  • No. I know most of this stuff is greatly exaggerated, and I have met many terrific girls in my lifetime. There's a lot more good people out there than you believe.

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  • Yeah it's pretty shitty. Feminism made the personal political and they did it in a big way with lies and demonization of men, so now the pendulum is beginning to swing back in the other direction and it's going to get much much worse before it gets better. Could even be a major factor in the collapse of civilization as we know it, it has been in the past.

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  • No. I like it. It means things are going to come to a head and change soon.

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  • Pretty sad when most relationships in the US end in divorce! Something is definitely wrong and we can't blame the opposite sex... We both need to reinvent the wheel together!

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    • That's the sad part. Even real life relationships are flawed.

  • It's definitely a downer, but it doesn't put me off relationships in general. You find the right person to spend time with and life is amazing.

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  • It bums me out but oh well

    Back to Mars lol

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  • Agree relationships are all crab

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  • Notice how most of the females don't care? Female nature is to be sociopaths. They don't care that most men are depressed or fucked up these days. All females are cold, selfish sociopaths that only care about female issues.

    Women are the enemy of men.

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  • To an extent, yes - but not on a basis of feminism and whatnot, but much rather than men and women seem to have forgotten the beauty in masculinity and feminity, the beauty of complementing each other while learning from each other.

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  • Yea those losers need help

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    • something tells me you learn the hard way how things really are. people your age are still forming... let them pass mid 20s and you'll see what dictates things.

  • Yes. And also how many other issues there are regarding relationships. I try to forget them all, but at least the subject of same-sex relationships comes to me every time I get on the internet for more than 3 minutes.

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  • You can thank the feminists and the divorce laws for this.

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    • this guy knows while teens and those who lack experience are talkng non sense.

  • It's a whole undeclared war going on with traitorous spies :P

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  • No, because actual normal people aren't like that

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  • getting real tired of reading the word "gender"

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  • Nah I'm pretty happy we are breaking up we were always a nasty couple who only stuck and put up with each other for reproduction. History has always been quite disturbing when you try to delve into it.

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  • I don't identify with any gender, and this is a huge reason why.

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  • Key word: online. I can tell you don't get out much.

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  • No I think the war is mainly lonely guys vs lonely girls.

    Both have had bad experiences with the opposite gender.

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    • they say 95 percent of the world is lonely

    • you say this as if it's somehow not the normal state of things, as if these problems aren't so bad that it literally ruins millions of peoples lives and costs tax payers billions of dollars, increases crime rates and abuse and on and on...

      Healthy stable families are the corner stone of a healthy society and you can't have that when the majority of families are fucked. This isn't a problem that exists only for a few looser internet trolls.

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