I have severe anxiety and it's ruining my life. My life is slipping away. What to do?

I'm coming here as a last resort because i'm tired of life. let me make it clear i would not and will not kill myself. do i think about suicide? yes, all the time, but that doesn't mean I'm suicidal. I have severe anxiety and it's ruining my life. im only 15 years old, 16 next month, and I feel as if my life is already over. yeah, I sound like an ungrateful, over dramatic teenager I know. I haven't left my house in weeks. I can't. I feel sick whenever I'm outside because there's no where for me to escape too. anxiety always makes me feel ill. I can't go to school anymore, haven't gone in months. I rarely see my friends- I'm too anxious to even be with them. I'm on medication and I still feel hopeless. I'm on some type of anti depressants and xanax and nothing works. I'm just so completely and utterly depressed. I can't live the rest of my life locked up in my room, but I also can't leave my house. my grades are slipping, I probably won't be able to ever go back to school. so what now? is my life over? what can I do? and please for the love of god do not say people have it worse. I know people have it worse I do I really do. I don't want to feel this way I swear. Im not crying because I have a rough life. im so tired because I have everything, yet at the same time I have nothing. nothing left. im sorry if this post doesn't make any sense or if it's long. I just need help I don't know what to do.

Updates:
escape to* and apologies for any other grammatical / spelling errors i missed

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, it is at least good you realize you have a problem. I think the thing you should focus on though is that there IS still hope for your life. There are people who haven't been to school in months from illnesses and made it just fine in life. Their grades may slip, but as hard as it is to hear this-- it will all work out in the end.

    Your life will go on.
    You can go back to school.
    You have possibilities still in life, despite how hopeless it may seem.

    I would get a therapist to try and help you through the more personal issues. They are trained and a good one can help. If you have severe anxiety and sincerely feel you cannot go outside or whatnot, they have home based therapy. A therapist in any form would be a good idea.
    http://www.goodtherapy.org/home-based-therapy.html

    What I find personally helpful (and I also know some of the psychology and studies behind it) is a thing called free/expressive writing.
    I could point to various results and such, but I guess just you'll need to trust me on this to try it. For my little blurb of typical psychologist advice, I would ask you to get a piece of paper (opening up a computer with something to type on works as well).

    Basically, you get a prompt, and you just freely write whatever comes to mind. Follow the rules as below.

    The general rules:
    1. Time: Write a minimum of twenty minutes per day for four consecutive days (I may even suggest more days though).
    2. Topic: What you choose to write about should be extremely personal and important to you.
    3. Write continuously: Do not worry about punctuation, spelling, and grammar. If you run out of things to say draw a line or repeat what you have already written. Keep pen on paper.
    4. Write only for yourself: You may plan to destroy or hide what you are writing. Do not turn this exercise into a letter. This exercise is for your eyes only.
    5. Observe the Flip-out Rule: If you get into the writing, and you feel that you cannot write about a certain event because it will push you over the edge, STOP writing!
    6. Expect heavy boots: Many people briefly feel a bit saddened or down after expressive writing, especially on the first day or two. Usually this feeling goes away completely in an hour or two.

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    • A prompt to perhaps write about:

      In your writing, I would like you to really let go and explore your very deepest emotions and thoughts about the most traumatic experience in your entire life. You might tie this trauma to other parts of your life: your childhood, your relationships with others, including parents, lovers, friends, relatives or other people important to you. You might link your writing to your future and who you would like to become your future, or to who you have been, who you would like to be, or who you are now. Not everyone has had a single trauma but all of us have had major conflicts or stressors and you can write about these as well. All your writing is confidential. There will be no sharing of content. Do not worry about form or style, spelling, punctuation, sentence structure, or grammar. ˇ

    • this might sound stupid but i was having a mental breakdown as i read this and it completely calmed me down. thank you for this response, I really appreciate it. i will try what you mentioned about the writing exercises and hopefully they help.

    • It doesn't sound stupid at all. I understand them to an extent myself both from personal experience and from research. Happy to help though!

      For more info on it all and details about free writing, check out the guy's page who studied the whole concept. (He also happened to be my professor for one class I had :D).
      homepage.psy.utexas.edu/.../WritingandHealth.html

      Some other topics to write about in your free/expressive writing:
      Something that you are thinking or worrying about too much
      Something that you are dreaming about
      Something that you feel is affecting your life in an unhealthy way
      Something that you have been avoiding for days, weeks, or years

      If you ever need more help with whatever situation you are going through, feel free to keep commenting on this post or PM me anytime. I may not be a psychologist, but I can sure try my best xD

Most Helpful Girl

  • Maybe you should go see a therapist, if you already are, then maybe you should go more regularly. I know that some people suffer from severe anxiety and goes through the same stuff you do, where they are unable to leave their house, etc. But unfortunately I do not have any advice, this is something only a therapist can help you with. I'm so sorry that you are going through this, but you just have to keep fighting and being strong, there is someone/something out there that will be able to help you.

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What Guys Said 2

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What Girls Said 2

  • If you're on anti depressants and they aren't working then it's logical that you get back to a psychiatrist and evaluate other options. I've been on mood stabilizers for years and the first thing they told me is that if it doesn't work, go back and get help. You can't expect results if you don't actively try to work from your side which in this case would be going back to a therapist and psychiatrist.

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    • I have an appointment this week. I had to try out the medicine for a month before going back since it takes weeks for it to begin working.

  • One questions where are you parents and what kind of parents are they

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    • my parents are great. they're supportive and encouraging.

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