Was I right to tell my parents this?

Lately my brother has been into this girl who openly talks about how she dates around and has had sex with a former boyfriend a few times, but has always used protection. My parents don't like her and called her a slut. I got mad and impulsively said they have no right to speak of another person that way, I told them there's nothing wrong with having sex as long as you are responsible, etc. they got mad and took away my phone. I am now typing this on my iPad. Not sure if what I did was right I think I could've gone about it in a better way.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • "they took away my phone. i am now typing this on my ipad" i'm sorry but i completely lost it at that line XD they take away your phone, they think they have you, you just casually carry on on your ipad XD thats priceless lol

    anyway, to answer the question, you were right to speak your mind. your parents dont even know this girl yet they're calling her a slut. real mature. calling a child a slut. as a grown up, especially as a parent, thats really dumb to do. kudos for you for speaking your mind and standing up for her :3

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think it was so much what you said as much as HOW you said it. By getting angry and speaking disrespectfully, you caused them to over-react. No, they probably shouldn't use words like 'slut' either but they that's not for you to correct.. particularly not in anger. You can still probably fix this if you go to them with a humble approach of, "I recognize I was in the wrong by talking to you that way, I should've shown more respect, and I'm sorry that I reacted in that manner." They may or may not reduce the 'phone' sentence but they'll gain more respect for you that you are accepting responsibility for your actions and apologizing genuinely for them.

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What Guys Said 18

  • You have an opinion and a right to express it. You were defending someone you felt was unfairly maligned. I don't think you did anything wrong.

    And because you are 18 and an adult, I think your parents need to stop acting like children, and give you your stuff back. You are a legal adult, trying to ground you or something like that is pretty BS at this point.

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  • Wow, you're 18 and they did. that? That's pretty low for them to do since you are a full grown ADULT now. Plus you were right telling them that. Even though not everyone does it there is no problem with having sex since it is a natural process as long as you are responsible, use protection and get checked for STDs on a regular basis.

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  • Sometimes if you stand up for your beliefs, you have to pay the price.

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  • There's an old proverb that springs to mind. "Least said, soonest mended". Better to smile and say nowt!

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  • Wait, you're 18 and they took your phone? not cool... You were right to stand up for her. How many sex partners a person has is not a measure of who they are. It does not make them good or bad. You did a good thing by standing up. Some people are just too set in their ways, either because they are too ignorant to change, or they dont want to change. I feel sad for people like that.

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    • phone belongs to the parents... she's just using it.

    • @orphan I forgot about that... I have been on my own since I my self was 16 so the idea of a parent taking something from me is a foreign concept to me.

    • me too..

      parents obv need a lesson in punishment. it's not much of a burden to get by w/ just wifi nowadays.

  • how old are you?
    I agree you could have gone about it another way... rather than stating your opinion, state it as questions, about what is happening, and make it a discussion. Instead you stated a firm position and no parent wants to hear that... I know other kids whove had their phones taken away for less than that...

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  • What you said wasn't wrong, it simply isn't what your parents want you to believe.

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  • wow you've been on gag too long.

    openly talks about having sex w/ her ex boyfriend at her boyfriends parents house.

    this girl doesn't really think about what she says before she says it.

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    • after reading it again... sounds like the 4 of you were at a family dinner or something.

      it's how you say it that matters, not what you say. in this case you directly told your parents what they can and can't do. c'mon now. better way is informing them about how you view her... and suggest giving it more thought before they impulsively call someone a slut.

      i see where got the impulsiveness from.

  • maybe you should have just kept your mouth shut, it wasn't very tactful

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  • When you got mad, did you raise your voice and sound angry?

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    • No I am naturally soft spoken and I spoke calmly

    • Show All
    • Possibly. I am not sexually active I just really, really hate slut shaming.

    • It sounds like your parents really misused the word.

  • Some parents don't accept discussion.
    You could have defended her without getting mad.

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  • Yah ahhhh yah you should've gone it in a different way

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  • Shut up u live in their house that their I pad and their phone.

    Nobody was talking to you it sounds like the reason u got in trouble was disrespecting them

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    • And that's your terrible grammar. It appears that no one likes truth bombs. Sorry that I don't like other girls calling other girls sluts and whores.

    • I am not privileged. I don't know where you got that actually. Great argument by the way calling someone half your age a privileged cunt? Real mature.

    • I don't know about that you called me a bitch.

  • your parents are probably right
    just based off how women and men are today
    she is most likely a slut

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  • Yeah you were right. Unfortunately sometimes parents don't like their kids standing up to them like that.

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  • Yeah you should have not sad

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  • hahaha "they took away my phone, now I am writing this on my ipad"
    first world problems

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  • you are better than them.

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What Girls Said 10

  • Lol what, seriously? They got mad and took away your phone because you don't want them to slut-shame some girl who has dated a few people and had protected sex with an ex? Smh. Some parents you have there, I feel sorry for you. You did the right thing.

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  • Nah, what you did was right, they probably just think thats what you're doing and thats why you defended her.

    I always had to be careful about what behaviours I defended to my dadand stepmum, otherwise they would think that I was doing whatever it is I was defending.
    (Like when I told my stepmum I could never get an abortion she accused me of being pregnant... Even though I was thirteen and had never shown an interest in boys at all at that point)

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    • Yeah I know you're what your talking about I remember doing a project for school and I wa spooking up something on Google and she happens to walk in when the mouse was hovering over how to out on a condom and she thought I was having sex I was 12 years old.

    • was looking*

  • I would have no care. Yeah parents are crazy! I don't tell them much!

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  • well in my opinion, you were completely right. but since your parents dont have the same beliefs, they got mad. its good that you stand up for others, just that was the wrong people because they still have some power over you and can do something about it (like take away your phone) but there wasn't anything wrong with what you said.

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  • you are right you could have done it a little better but I think you have a right to your opinion just need to work on diplomacy when talking to your parents

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  • Yes because your parents were being judgmental mouth-breathers.

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  • If I was you I would have say nothing, cause in reality that's not your problem. Plus you know how your parent are no?
    The right to tell that to your parent depend how you tell them did you yell / accuse them? or did you tell them with a calm tone?

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    • They are much more conservative and traditional than I am so they see premarital sex as a no-no. They are getting better about it though. I just calmly told them, "you have no right to call her that" especially since the only person who actually knows her is my brother and then they blew up in my face.

    • My parent are really conservative too and even if they say something bad, like a racist comment or something like that. I know it's better if I keep it for me.
      They critic a lot of people in front of me and it's work better if I agree with them

  • Yes if he is under age then yes you should TELL you parents

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  • I think it's good you stood up for her, too bad your parents felt the need to punish you for it :(

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  • Why do you have a phone and an IPad?
    Your parents are right and I know I'll get hate for that but I think they're right

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