How come I can't socialize normally like other people?

Other people seem to laugh, make friends, talk and think quickly, trust people, talk about sex, talk about their families, talk about ANYTHING... Look people in the eye, smile, etc...

I just sit there by myself, I have no friends, can barely look people in the eye for one second, and always struggle to think of things to say...

Why is this?

Other people have more conversations in a single day than I do in a year...


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Dude, I was like that for two years of high school, geez. Everyone thought I WAS WEIRD and found it hard to aproach me. Then on the first day of the third year I simply decided to change my mindset, not to think but to simply act natural. Just don't think too much, look at peoples motions (look them in the eyes even if you find it hard. It's all just in your head) and try to understand them, laugh and relax and make funny observations. It might feel like acting at first but later you will learn to appreciate that whole thing with having company.

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    • Socializing drains me...

      I can't think of the last time I had an enjoyable conversation...

      And when I try to force it, I feel like I'm bothering people...

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    • Youu keep saying "That's easier said than done...". Get out of your routine, stop searching for excuses and cut it out. Maybe it's a disorder, not aspergers or autism, but more something like Avoidant personality disorder or Social anxiety disorder. Those are not untreatable.

    • Yea I also have paranoid schizo, but it's under control...

Most Helpful Guy

  • If youve nothing to hide you could look anybody in the eye all day. You look away coz you dont want somebody to see something you dont like you know is there. Better be honest with yourself. there's not very admirable characteristics in you and you know it. Thte fact your aware makes it a hundred times worse. You can't hide whats in your heart from yourself or anybody else. Better start cleaning house or forever stare at the floor not talking

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What Girls Said 2

  • You're an introvert and most likely socially inept.

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    • Explain "inept,"...

      I used to be a lot more social when I was younger and did drugs...

      What am I incapable of doing that someone less inept could do?

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    • So if I have Asperger's, am I just fucked for life?

    • No there's actually behavioural therapy to help make you more confident and comfortable in social situations.

  • You have social anxiety? Depression? Experience high levels of anxiety or fear? Feel like people are always watching you? Adult selective mutism? Perhaps high functioning aspergers? Borderline personality disorder?

    Work on improving yourself. Read, gain hobbies. Do you venture outside of your home other than work?

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    • I am never at home...

      I have every mental disorder in the book...

      I'm not scared of much other than socializing...

What Guys Said 3

  • Most people put it on. I put it on.

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  • Autism.

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    • I have considered that...

      Asperger's, more accurately...

      I don't know how to definitively get tested...

    • You go a qualified psychologist. Referral.

  • Maybe because your to caustus to take chances. When ever we socialize with others we take the chance of being hurt.

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    • I take chances in other areas of life...

      What would I be hurt by?

      I seriously just can't think of anything to say

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    • Easier said than done...

      Especially when it seems that people don't want to talk to me for some unknown reason when I haven't even said a word to them...

    • Try finding a small group to join that you have common interests with.

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