What makes someone intimidating?

Assuming you find that person attractive, what puts you off from the idea of talking to them, or if you're not into approaching, what makes you not smile, give them a "signal", or whatever you do to get their attention?

I know not everyone gets intimidated by others, but we all judge someone when we see them and decide whether we want to talk to them or not, even if we're attracted to that person.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • If he has an angry resting face then I'm gonna assume, like people do with me and my RBF, that he's not open to new conversations and being approached.

    Or if he walks around acting like a douchebag (loudly mocking things, people, etc.) then I'll be put off from going beyond the finding him nice to look at stage.

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    • You sound like the female incarnation of me

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    • @SirLosesalot a lot of people have RBF and angry resting faces. I meant nice try as in nice try in attempting to identify with me.

    • Yea and it's ironic because they think others are unfriendly when they're actually not and ok.

Most Helpful Guy

  • Might be in a hurry, for one. I won't be put off by anything when it comes to talking to women. I don't do the "signals" or try and get her attention. Unless she comes to me first, it's always me who starts the conversation.

    In the past, I was intimidated by the fact that she would reject me, but that was brought about by some silly notion of "us". There is no "us", there doesn't even need to be any "real reason" to talk to her. It may as well be a friendly chat. Maybe it gets more friendly, maybe it won't. People are different. Rejection can and will occur and it doesn't necessarely have to be anyone's "fault". It's just how things go. Accept that simple reality and the colours you see will change.

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What Girls Said 17

  • They don't seem friendly or approachable, and it's like you'd be bothering them if you went to say something. Also, people who are too aggressive or take themselves really seriously - you just kinda want to stay away.

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    • What makes a guy seem unfriendly?

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    • I'm literally all of those, but I'm not even unfriendly damn this sucks.

    • Yeah, it's just how it is. You have to act friendly to appear friendly to other people, since mind-reading isn't a thing yet lol.

  • The only thing that tends to intimidate me is if the show no interest in my existence or if they are forwardly aggressive.

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  • Okay for me it was always this:
    1) Very Hot confident guys and girls.
    2) Very Rich aristocratic people
    3) Very smart people

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  • Money, beauty... the works~

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  • Being good looking, being human, talking, being older than me, being taller than me, being smarter than me..

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  • I'm no longer intimidated by guys, no matter if they are hot, rich or smarter than me. If I'm interested in a guy, I'll talk to him. If I'm not sure about him, then I won't act on it. If its a guy that's attracted to me, but never acts on it. I call that beating about the bush and wasting my time. I get fed up and move on. The last time I took a shy guy by the hand, by being the first to talk to him. He made no effort with me. I was left to do all of the initiating. . . Fuck that! Lol.

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  • If a guy seems out of my league such as appearance wise, his friends, finances, family, intelligence. I'll usually feel as if he would reject me before even getting a chance to know me due to us being on two different levels, or however you would like to put that.

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  • I need to know them to get intimidated cs I don t really get intimidated by looks
    but if he is really confident, overwhelming, controlling a bit powerful in his presence
    also if I feel he has much more experience than me
    or much smarter
    or much more money
    or a combo of that haha

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  • I'm socially awkward if I'm not alone with anyone and no need to embarrass myself in front of everyone, especially that person.

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  • Nothing intimidates me ;)

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  • I talk to other people no matter what and the reason why I'm with my awesome boyfriend. ^^ I never get intimidated by them no matter how hot they are. Even if they sound a certain way, I never back down until I know 100% I'm wasting my time.

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  • They look through me? I hate being ignored. Say hi or say ger lost... Don't ignore me if we know each other some.

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  • I won't say anything because I'm scared of getting rejected. I've approached guys before and I was embarrassed so never again.

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  • mm no one intimidates me, what makes that person better than me? if they can have the "it" factor then so do I. intimidation is nothing to me.

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    • It's not just intimidation, but if you see a hot guy, what makes you not want to approach him?

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    • But how do you know that if you haven't talked to him?

    • because I'm always right, my gym is surrounded by good looking shallow guys.

  • If he seems overly confident (which is not a bad thing at all), I probably would feel like he isn't available or something. I need the person to show signs of interest.

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  • If they're better than me in some way, I get a bit intimidated

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  • If their to attractive or to well known sometimes those 2 factors makes me extremely nervous and i hate it

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What Guys Said 14

  • I guess if she has a bitchy face or seems full of herself.

    Aside from that, Im generally more intimidated by the competition than I am of the actual girl. Like if she attracts guys who are more attractive, more popular or more successful then that intimates me way more than how she looks or what she has done.

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  • I answered this question the other day in a different context. I'm 6"1 230 lbs lol.. I'm a pretty big dude in comparison to your average joe. I'm also really alert and have to know my surroundings all the time. I'm constantly sizing people up.. if I eat a restaurant I have to be facing the door. It wasn't till a couple of friends pointed this out to me when I realized that it's pretty intimidating and really off putting to a lot of people. I look like a cop too lol. After they pointed it out it made sense as to why people wouldn't approach me or talk to me. I've learned to calm it down a lot and be more subtle. Learned to smile more. I don't know what else could be intimidating to a girl when she looks at a guy though. Just talking from my experience.

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  • If it's a girl, an excessive display of wealth would be a number one intimidation and turn off.

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  • They have the skill and capability to kill or defeat me, that's one of the few things that really intimidates me about someone.

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  • When they're 6'3" and 250lbs like me

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  • I guess if they look out of my league or I can't afford their type of maintenance

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  • They stare you down.

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  • I can't really say, because I am too shy to even look at a woman. All I do is hope that a attractive woman finds me attractive and makes the first move. That's probably useless LOL.

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  • A nice ass

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  • knowledge. I still have nightmares over my debate with a Canadian feminist Alishba Zarmeen. I respect her and her vast knowledge.

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  • If she looks like she can get any guy she wants.

    It doesn't matter though, I have to learn to hide my fears and try because otherwise I WILL die alone.

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  • She seems out of my league, or with a group of people and if she shows no sign of attraction.

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  • nothing its just most women believe they came from a rock
    I don't wanna date someone that dumb

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  • nothing... it's only weak people who get intimidated by others.

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    • It's not just intimidation, but if you see a hot girl, what makes you not want to approach her.

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