Does this happen to anyone else?


Basically I'll be there for someone no matter what. If you text me or message me that you need to talk or anything, I'll be there. That's just the type of person I am BUT I've noticed that some people aren't there for me like I am with them. For the past couple of days I needed someone to really be there for me. It's been rough couple of days and I feel like some of the people I talk to aren't there for me like I am for them. Does this happen to anyone else?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • That's how mexican culture is laid out for the most part. I look like a white boy but I'm half mexican. My father is Mexican has always gone to great lengths to take care of his loved ones including myself. Really strong family values that are almost intertwined with the Mexican culture.

    Dude it's a great trait to have.. you're a caring person and a lot of guys value that especially when it comes to girlfriend or wifey material.

    If your friends aren't reciprocating then you need to communicate that to them immediately because if you hold it in.. A... you won't get the support you need and B... you will build resentment towards them when it could easily just be a communication problem. Nobody wants a pessimist for that is universally unattractive but if you are going through legit struggles then you should approach them for that out of self respect.

    After you communicate that to them.. then you should make your decision as to whether you want them in your life or not. Gauge their response... if they don't care about you and your well being then fucking drop them dude. That's the main issue my father has had.. people have taken advantage of his kindness.. most of it being financially because he was one of the few in his family that got his shit together and and makes a lot of money coming from a broken home.

    I've noticed this for while about my dad when I was growing up and I told myself reaching adulthood and becoming a man that I wouldn't make those same mistakes and let people take advantage of me. I was sort going down that same route and that's one of the reasons I enlisted into the Marines.. I didn't want to be like that.

    I can be an asshole at times... and it takes a hell of a lot for me to trust others and that's why i only have like 3-4 real friends and just a shit load of acquaintances.

    BUT when someone earns my respect and trust I got their back no matter what. I'd take a bullet for any of my friends or family members and that's even if I'm pissed off with them at the time. I'm saying that because I feel like you probabaly have those same values but might be getting taken advantage of just like my father has.

    Worst thing you can do is just keep all this shit bottled up and stay on standby with your emotions. You have to make a move and assert yourself to fix the situation.

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What Guys Said 18

  • Some people are really insensitive to other people's problems. They really do not want to hear about it.

    I will listen to a person and be as helpful as I can as long as they are not a chronic complainer.

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  • I feel ya. I've done a lot of things in my years of highschool with my best buds but one of them did me dirty. I covered for him, hooked him up with cool (expensive) shit, repaired shit for him, and helped him out with Calc. In return he offered me rides anywhere (if you haven't noticed I'm 17 so I didn't have my license 4 years back) and maybe covered me when if I was short when we grubbed. Yet when I needed help he fed me bullshit, gave loads of excuses, and tried to get out of every situation by saying his done so much for me. At one point, I tried to help him lose weight since it was a goal he always wanted to achieve. Yet he refused to let go of the junk he ate and only worked out maybe once a month gibing himself loads of excuses. Thats when I had enough because I realized he feeds himself bullshit and it's just who he is. So I told him to fuck off and just remember all the shit I did for him and gave him. Now we barely talk and if we do its just banter. Do yourself a favor and don't put the effort in because some people don't change.

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    • Gosh I'm sorry you went through that. :/ but yeah I'm learning that... If I put too much effort I end up getting messed over.

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    • It's cool cause I know when he can no longer handle his weight he'll realize it too.

    • Lol I'm sorrrrryyyy :o but that is very true!

  • Yeah had a friend like that. I was always there, gave them advice and I got nothing in return. I'm not about one-sided friendships, so I finally cut that person out of my life, and it was the best decision I've made.

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    • Yeah one sided friendships suck. But I'm glad you made that decision!!

  • NOT ANYMORE. I only have real friends now.

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  • Because you're just that type of person. They need people like you to talk to and rest on and get support from, because they struggle mentally. They just naturally gravitate towards you. You will always be the supporter in these kinds of relationships and never vice versa.

    It's a common thing among good people like you.

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  • Person I've always considered my vest friend and I'd do nearly anything for... Doesn't really do anything for me

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  • Yes you be there for others than they don't want reciprocate

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  • Not trying to brag but my friends are usually there for me
    Including gag ones
    You know who you are
    If you want on me though you can vent

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  • story of my life, but a lot of times people who go out of the for others all the time aren't very good at asking for help

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  • Sometimes it's hard to recognize when someone needs help.

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  • there's more to being there than just "talking"

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    • Yeah I know. I've helped people when they have had car problems, family problems, relationship problems, living situation problems and financial problems.

    • and none of those people are anywhere to be found?

    • Apparently not.

  • You should only be there for people who have sex with you.

    It's not worth it to help everyone out.

    There's no reward for the misery they put you through.

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  • hugs to you

    The more you live the more you realise the only one you can count on is you

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  • I've been in your situation a few times and it really sucks. The sad part was the two friends got upset at me for being upset at them (if that makes sense)

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  • Lol exactly same here. I got irritated after awhile, and now I feel like that turned me into an asshole. Made me a lot more self-centered and less altruistic.

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    • I'm worried that I'll end up being a bitch or something because I'm just really frustrated with this.

    • I know how you feel. You just need to be a little more self-centered, and realize that you DON'T need to be there for people every single time, because they can take care of themselves. If they can't, that's when you help them.

  • Not really

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What Girls Said 10

  • Literally me now!

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  • All too often unfortunately.

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  • Sorry :-( some people are unreliable, which is why you eliminate them out of your life and find better friends. But thats happened to me, many times. I learned to move on and not care. As should you.

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  • Of course. Some people are generally selfish

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  • Happens to me all the damn time, it sucks, I recently lost a friend because of it.

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  • happens 2 me all the time.

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  • This is my life in a nutshell. I guess I just care too much.

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  • Its reality. Unfortunately

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  • That's my life..

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  • Oh yeah, it happens to me all the time, Im like you and sometimes it even frustrates me, Im always there for anyone that needs help but when I need someone they just aren't there

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