Is it normal to not always feel "butterflies" for a crush?

I know this is very juvenile and rather stupid, which I am very much both, but I've been overthinking this a lot lately.

its almost been two years since I started crushing on this guy, who I'm not exactly sure I'm over. Sometimes I feel like I am, but mostly I feel like I'm not. The reason I say this is because, I remember I had hella butterflies during my very first crush ever {which started 11 years ago} and lasted 5 years, but I don't recall getting the feels that much around this other guy. im not one to crush a lot, but when I do, it's hard and chronic. I can recall a few incidences where I did feel "butterflies" for him, but it wasn't all the time. Now I'm beginning to question whether or not I actually liked him, or the thought of him?

is it normal to not always feel butterflies for a crush?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yeah I'd say the crush has worn off. It's happened to me before when it doesn't progress or really go anywhere

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    • so about how long do you think it usually takes for a crush to wear off and feelings become real? Because that's exactly what's happened to me. It's been almost 2 years, and nothing's happened and I feel like nothing ever will, but I also feel like I'll never get over him. I've tried to but I can't. Something keeps holding me back

    • They've varied for me. Maybe the longest time it's taken for me to get over a crush would be like 3 or 4 years. But some maybe only 6 months. It depends how far I got like talking to her or getting to know about her etc. One of my long term crushes kinda ended when she got a boyfriend. I had plans to ask her out but I was too slow and missed my opportunity. Plus we are good friends so that kinda made me a little bit hesitant because I didn't wanna lose the friendship if it backfired.

What Guys Said 3

  • Lol i wondered the same thing. This one girl i went to HS had me crushing hard. Im talking butterflies everytime i was near here. Beautiful for sure, funny, and she was kinda weird. I still think about her sometimes and i ended up messaging her on fb to see if she had any interest but it was a no go

    I was so nervous her, I've never felt that way before about anyone. I dont think i ever will again. 😓

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    • I'm very sorry to here that:( that's exactly how I feel right now!!

  • Yup, imho as long as you've felt some form of feels, it's perfectly fine to be ambivalent some of the time.

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    • I have but its only when we've had intimate contact, or when I'm around him, which is that often.

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    • Thanks for listening then :) I just needed to blow some steam, it's not actually a problem since she's responded now. I just really hate being ignored just like you said! I'm one of those people who usually answers ANYTHING within a day.

    • No problem:-) I feel you. Being ignored sucks!! Same!! {like 99% of the time lol}

  • I suppose that can happen.

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