Why do psychopaths have so many friends?

I dated a psychopath for 3 years. Before you get to know her she is charming, hilarious, relatable, and just fun to be around, but after getting to know her you start to see her manipulative, psychopathic side. It makes me wonder why she has so many friends? She is a compulsive liar so maybe people don't know how she really is, but she has a best friend she's had for many years and has even lived with her but her friend doesn't seem to notice. My ex would always say that I'm the only one who knew her for what she really was. She would beat me, manipulate me, lie to me about everything, emotionally abuse me and not feel any guilt or compassion but was amazing at faking it. She would make me pity her and use this to her advantage. She got me to do things I never would have done on my own. Yet I still yearned to be around her and still miss her 6 months after our break up. Why are people so drawn to psychopaths? Everyone thought she was so cool, people wanted to be around her, her friends would literally fight over time with her. I don't understand why people love her so much when she's so cruel and has no love or compassion for anyone but herself? She would use and steal from every single friend she had. She would talk shit on her closest friends, yet me who is always honest, true to myself and empathetic has no friends? I was thinking it might have something to do with the fact that you have to fight to be in her life, but I accept anyone so its not much of a challenge. I don't know, what do you think?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • Even though i do agree that people are drawn to psychopaths... what you described is not really psychopathic... worst case... borderline. Probably anger issues or the like. A true psycho would get the same reaction from others... and would make you feel like shit without having to do much physically. I know... i was raised by one... think I'm one too... who knows... :)

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    • One of her friends that knew her for 10 years did notice and stopped being friends with her, another guy who was very perceptive noticed it in her too. Most of her friends do not notice because she acts like a different person around them. She puts on a front that's basically the opposite of her true self. It wasn't just anger issues, my dad has bipolar disorder, narcissistic personality disorder and obsessive compulsive disorder and he wasn't nearly as bad as she is and thats saying something. She was definitely psychopathic. I'm not even describing 90% of what she did. This is the Pg version lol. She made me feel horrible enough to attempt suicide and she didn't even beat me often, I can count all the times she beat me on my hands. The worst part was the verbal abuse, her terrible vibe, and extremely manipulative and deceitful behavior. At some point in the relationship I started having panic attack every single day and I never had them before her.

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    • oh i know that. thats why i don't take my fam all that serious. i love them but they also love them too soo... well I'm happy to see you got out... but that mental aspect though... hard to get rid of that.

    • thanks for MH

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What Guys Said 4

  • Who said they have so many friends? I don't believe that

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  • Doubt she is a psychopath lol

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    • lol she would literally describe to me the ways she wanted to murder people and how she knew she was going to do it in her lifetime and I knew she was serious. Her eyes looked soulless, like she didn't have an ounce of love in her. She would literally laugh when I started having panic attacks. She fits into almost every symptom I've been able to find, so if she's not a psychopath I don't know what is. This explanation doesn't doesn't even begin to cover it

    • My guess is that it is something else if she likes to do that.

  • cause they know how to maniuplate

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  • You sound envious

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    • I wouldn't say envious. I do have a lot of pent up resentment towards her, but anyone would after being put through such terrible things

What Girls Said 1

  • Birds of a feather flock together

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