Was my mother jealous that my cousin who she thinks is 'better' appreciates my gift?

I have a younger cousin he's around 17 or 18. I left a book to give to him with my mother.

I asked her about it, she said yeah I gave it, and then changed the topic. I was surprised. I asked a little more over it, and she again answered yeah he liked it, then changed the topic.

When I went to India, while initially the kid was a brat, this time around he was really respectful and sweet. So I'm not sure whether to believe my mother who was implying he didn't care.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Probably it was a thoughtful gift which made him happy and she was jealous.
    She should have mentioned how cool it was of you to give a thoughtful gift. It's far better than a gift card which most unthoughtful people give.
    Do you ever give your mother any thoughtful gifts?
    She could have been a little hurt too if she doesn't get thoughtful gifts from you sometimes. Like maybe when it isn't a holiday, make a gift by hand to give. If I was a parent, that would mean a lot to me.

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    • 2mo

      But she is the one who encouraged me to give it to him. She even told me to personally handwrite the note. Plus when I was debating whether to give it to him, she said I should.

      So it confuses me as to why she would do that. Plus what I find more suspicious is why did she just 'forget' to tell me. She could've instantly told me on the same day she gave it to him that yeah I gave it and he was appreciative.

      Either he really truly wasn't, and that's why she didn't want to bring it up, or she is mad because he is this really smart kid kind of guy, and she probably felt jealous that he thinks of me as a sister and appreciated the gift.

      When I broached the subject, she added that the next time she saw him, he said he started reading the book too.

      I said it seems from your tone he wasn't appreciative, and she didn't deny it, she just said no he said thank you etc. and I said maybe I shouldn't give other people stuff if they're not considerate, she said yeah

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    • 2mo

      Well, if he is reading it, then it was a good gift and it was a good idea.
      I think your parents should try their best to make you feel good about yourself whenever they can, but at the same time need to be honest with you.

    • 2mo

      What do you mean by that? That she should encourage me but not lie to me? Yeah I agree.

      But do you think that's what happened with this book incident? He actually wasn't appreciative and instead of explaining that to me in a polite way she just didn't bother?

      Another thing I noticed about my mother is she only uses her manipulative tactics when there's some truth to a situation. For example, my uncle said something which deeply disturbed me, and she told me later on, I think they're not sorry. This is an hour before my flight.

      If that was her telling the truth, she could've followed it up with, but who cares? They're dumbass people and they're probably miserable that we cut them off.

      But no till to the end she maintained they weren't sorry knowing full well it would upset me

What Girls Said 1

  • Yes she seems like a person who does

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