Do you get jealous? How do you feel about jealousy?

I think feeling jealous is a terrible feeling. It makes my thoughts turn out of character and I have even acted very catty out of jealousy.
I've recently began to try and just fix the areas I find I get jealous about about.
I have a new friend in my life who seems to make comments that trigger my insecurities, he told me he loves how jealous I get.
I just shut down. I don't laugh or joke or get mad anymore but I am sort of upset he does this intentionally.
Does anyone actually like or enjoy jealousy?
I am sure he was being harmless and had no idea how these feelings have been effecting me the past few weeks. I feel a fool for having been struggling lately for something that was being done intentionally.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I never get jealous. I honestly can't remember the last time ever being jealous by something. I do get envious though.

    Envy occurs when we lack a desired attribute enjoyed by another.
    Jealousy occurs when something we already possess (usually a special relationship) is threatened by a third person

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What Guys Said 6

  • I'm a bit split on this because I distinguish between sexual and emotional jealousy. There's also envy (your story about your friend sounds more like envy) but that's yet another topic.
    Sexual jealousy is a great enjoyment for me. I'm one of those guys who feels very aroused by the idea of my girlfriend having sex with other guys. She doesn't actually do it but that's because she doesn't want to (I asked her and she said she's not up for it). I know a lot of people find this weird but for some reason, being jealous in a purely sexual way is no problem for me. In fact, it turns me on big time. I find it hot to have a girlfriend that makes other guys turn their heads and somehow the idea of having a sexually dominant girlfriend who likes to be promiscuous is arousing.
    On the other hand, there is emotional jealousy. This is a completely different matter. I have now been dating the same girl for a long time and I have come to learn and understand that emotional loyalty is MUCH more important than sexual loyalty. Sexual loyalty doesn't really mean anything to me. Sleeping with another guy that you don't love is just like sticking a piece of meat into another piece of meat. Emotional loyalty is what truly forms the cornerstone of a stable relationship. Things like being there for each other in hard times and always defending your boyfriend/girlfriend, no matter what. You can see this quite well with old couples: some old couples have been monogamous for their whole life, others have gone through periods of open marriage. But one thing that unites all of them is their emotional loyalty - their deep, undying love and care for each other (for example people neglecting their job and instead sitting at their husband's/wife's hospital bed in times of sickness).
    My girlfriend and I are getting married soon and I want to stay with her for the rest of my life. I know that for this to work out, emotional loyalty is much more crucial than sexual loyalty. Relationships can deal with sexual promiscuity and many serious, longterm relationships can even recover from cheating but no relationship can recover from "falling out of love".

    This is why I have no problem with other guys being sexually interested in my girlfriend. What I get very jealous about however is seeing a guy getting emotionally attracted to my girlfriend (crushing on her) because in that case there is a real danger of losing her. So I react very allergic to that ;-). Luckily, this only happened once so far.

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  • It does feel weird when your jealous cause we get thoughts that are out of character for us. I'm a fun easy going guy but sometimes I do get jealous when the girl that I like has fun with my freinds. I feel so out of character and weird. It is like someone replaced emotions. I got jealous when my crush danced with our mutual female freind. and when my freind was having fun with her playing a game that I don't really like to play.
    It is like why did I feel that way. I know that nothing will happen. If I was bolder I would have danced with her. Or if I stuck around I could have joined in the game.
    I really don't like it and it is hard to know when it will happen but as long as I don't act on it I'm fine but I don't feel fine.
    How is he making you jealous Consistantly?

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  • I'm not a very jealous person and I rarely ever get jealous, it's just not the kind of person I am or maybe it's just that I'm not that threatened or intimidated by other people *shrugs* though I do get jealous on occasions.

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  • Yeah I do. But I think we all do. Isn't jealousy the fuel the burns the fire inside you to improve yourself?

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  • I am burning

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  • if i love i ll be jealous but not too much

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What Girls Said 18

  • Yeah a bit sometimes. Especially when Im sick at home and my friends hang out together without me 😢 I absolutely hate feeling jealous.

    I think some people enjoy jealousy because it makes them feel important, which is why in relationships a teeny bit of jealousy is fine, because it shows that you really wanna be with that person. Too much jealousy is not good though.

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  • Jealousy is not easy to avoid. I get jealous or competitive when it comes to romance and my passions. It's tiring, but it's just a natural feeling.

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  • I rarely get jealous when it comes to my boyfriend and other girls. I'm just too secure in my contribution as a person/woman/partner to question myself if he cheats, it would seriously be his loss.
    But I get jealous more regarding someone "stealing" my friends. I'm possessive about stuff like that, and I'm seeing it now and trying to figure out why and how to stop it. I think it's because I don't have a lot of friends at this new school as much as before. And it's making me over protective of the few I have.

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  • I rarely get jealous.. when guys usually do try to get me jealous I just play along with it, got no time for games :p

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  • i get mean and aggressive when jealous. its definitely not an attractive trait and i would say try to brush it off... save your jealousy for when shits really going down, like if someone cheats on you, etc

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  • I'm a big jelly belly

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  • I don't really get jealous unless some girl is flirting with my man... not saying I don't ever get jealous just not that easily

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  • Only if I feel threatened by a pretty girl trying to seduce my man 😡

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  • I don't get jealous easily. I used to, but then realized how pointless it is.

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  • I do get jealous usually at my sisters and honestly i hate being jealous. You feel scorn towards someone because they have something you don't. Jealousy is sn ugly thing. Its petty and it makes me feel incomplete.

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  • I do get jealous of what some people can do, sports wise
    and I'm using that as a motivation to work at this 'issue'

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  • I do get jealous easily and I hate it.
    Very bad quality of mine.

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  • Yes, I do

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  • I get jealous A LOT, Im very insecure

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  • Of course, I get jealous, I'm human. I just try to suppress it or let it go when it comes to the guy that I like because I know that it's me he's interested in.

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  • I'm the meanest bitch ever when I'm jealous, but it feels good

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  • Yes I do I guess but at the end I realize that it is not right.

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  • Im the most jealous person in the world! Especially with guys i like.. Ughh!!

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