Is it true no matter how much we dislike someone it's important to be nice to them?

I feel as though I always get into conflict because I show when I think someone has acted unfairly OR if I don't have any real connection to the person.

I am starting to realize whether a person is super intelligent or completely stupid, one kind word makes all the difference. It baffles me.

Yes it's true I'm not the most polite person alive, but I am not fake. Plenty of people who say nice things to someone's face and talk shit behind their back.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I find most people are passive aggressive to people they don't like even if they put up a front to be tolerable to them.

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Most Helpful Girl

  • There's no need to be rude or mean to anyone , unless they are insulting or mean towards you

    Being nice to people even though you can't stand them shows a sign of maturity and self-control over your emotions and actions

    Being nice doesn't mean you're fake. It means you're wise enough to know that being rude isn't always the best way to deal with people. Why cause conflict just coz you don't like them

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    • 1mo

      I agree there's no need to be rude or mean. I feel even when I'm neutral sometimes it doesn't always prevent conflict.

      I think I just show what I'm feeling. So for example, when I don't want to talk about osmething it is written all over my face and that has nothing to do with being rude or being mean.

      I think the easiest way to deal with people is just being nice. Then that person feels oh this person is so sweet to me why should I be rude etc.

      It's sad. But I'm starting to think it's the way the world works.

    • 1mo

      Yeah I get what you mean. I'm the same too. Some days i just don't want to talk abkut myself or I'm not my jolly self. People who aren't used to me being that way at times, may assume I'm being rude, but I'm not.

      I think it's important to be assertive as well as being nice.

      To be honest , I think some people are confrontational anyway , so even if you're nice they'll try to find a way of antagonizing you.

What Guys Said 3

  • While you don't have to be nice, you should always try and be polite.

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    • 1mo

      I feel as though I'm a very righteous person. This rubs people the wrong way because it almost makes them feel like I think I'm better than them or something, when really I just.. am who I am.

      I noticed the ease at which you get your way if you're polite to someone it's crazy. I actually cannot get over how simple life is when you're polite.

      I almost feel like tomorrow I can go up to an astronaut and flatter them a little and I'd get my way.

      That's how surprised I am at how people are willing to be helpful if you're polite to them.

    • 1mo

      So you find adhering to social graces difficult? It's important to know when to brutally honest and when to mellow the truth if you want to succeed in life. People are not machines, they don't operate on cold hard logic. However, there is a difference between being nice (flattery) and polite.

      - You think a lady is overweight, but you don't go up and tell her that unless she asks you for an honest opinion. That is polite.
      - You think a lady is overweight, but you tell her she looks fantastic and is actually a perfectly healthy 200lbs. That is being nice, flattering fake etc.

  • I like to think i'm grown up enough to tolerate my hatred for someone to be nice too and about them

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  • Do on to others as you wish them to do on to you

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What Girls Said 3

  • I don't think you have to be nice all the time even if the person is mean to you or others. I would say to stay humble, don't go and put yourself to his level. Just say the truth, say it like it is and be true to yourself if you know you're right. Don't do it to be mean to the other person. Most of the time, even if people don't understand or criticise what you do but you are real to yourself and you are doing this for the right thing, they won't really have someting to say about it.

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    • 1mo

      I had this approach and I realize unfortunately how it never works on people.

      Everyone has an ego. If you want to get your way, you have to just be nice and make them feel like oh wow this person is being so nice to ME (make them feel great pretty much).

      I used to think hard work gets you places. I am starting to believe the whole 'it's not what you know, it's who you know philosophy)

      I work pretty hard and I see people who don't work as hard but are very social get ahead.

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    • 1mo

      No worries baout the grammar :)

    • 1mo

      You do chose you're fight, im not saying to go for it for every assholes of the earth because it would be only depressing. Just yeah, stay polite and true to yourself. Don't worry about others or what they say really, they are in they're own shit. Don't think they have it better because they seem like :)

  • no its not true.. i'd never be nice towards someone whom i dislike

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  • If you have nothing kind to say to them you don't have to talk to them

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    • 1mo

      EXACTLY. This is my approach. It never works.

      Usually people seem to dislike me. And the moment I am 'polite' or flattering towards them they change.

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