Let's say you got cheated on and lied to, what would you do?

let's say your so called "SO" decided to cheat on you with 3 others and lied to you about almost everything including where he/she was and what they were doing, and the moment he/she feels like you might leave for good, they go back to talking with their ex because they need a "friend"
what would you do? how would you feel?

I know most people would say just leave or so and I agree you can't stay, but what would you do with your life if it was revolving around that person?
how would you feel
I know for myself everything feels so pointless but I know that no matter what there's no going back and there's nothing to do but let go

but how would you feel and what would you do, would you let go or seek revenge, would you scream and shout or just quietly leave? how would you see that person after knowing the truth?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • First, I am very sorry that you have had this experience. Dating is a series of relationships which end badly, culminating in one rnationship that never ends. . . but the relationships that end don't need to end this badly. One day, you'll look back and know that this experience helped you to appreciate the good woman who you eventually found. I also know that platitudes like that don't make you feel better now.

    Do you know anyone who ever profited from getting revenge on a former lover? Me neither. Revenge is a way of staying attached to the other person, even if its in a negative way, and the best thing you can do for yourself is to let go and move forward. YOu have already wasted part of your life with this girl; why waste even more time plotting revenge?

    If anybody tells you to forget about her, they are not thinking. It is impossible to forget something like this. . . and you shouldn't. Re-examine this relationship and question whether there were warning signs that you missed, things that you could have done to avoid getting tangled up with such a low life. Maybe you can make yourself a better person as a result of this.

    How do you move on? Read this:

    www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a11176-a-practical-guide-for-how-to-get-over-your-breakup-how-to-get-on

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Honestly what I would do with my life is working making my life not revolve around this person. This person didn't and doesn't care about you. If they did, they wouldn't have lied to you and did those hurtful things. You don't deserve to keep someone like that in your life. What you do deserve is to keep around people who create positivity in your life.

    Start doing this by keeping busy. Invest your time in hobbies and visits with friends. Little by little you will start to think less of this person. Eventually you won't think of them at all.

    Focus on the things you want in your life and not on the negative. Focusing on the negative only breeds more negative thinking and puts you into a negative tailspin of self pity and sadness. No one needs that. Instead, try to focus on the good aspects of your life. Now yes, it's not going to be easy. We all have our bad days. But I think the best thing you can do is as soon as you feel a bad thought coming on. Recognize it and then aim to think about something good.

    Don't seek revenge on this person. As much as it might seem like a good idea at the time, it's only reaffirming the impact that person has had on your life. It screams "I care wayy to much about this person who doesn't care about me".

    Let them know you can no longer be with them and move on. Don't make excuses for them. You know in your heart you cannot be with them, so move forward.

    It won't be easy but it's totally doable. Just takes time. I know because I have been here. My ex boyfriend lied our whole relationship and cheated on me too. I don't even know what was true about our time together anymore. Other than how I felt about him at that time. I had to put in a lot of work to move forward. But you will get there! It just takes time and I find keeping busy really helps. Work on improving your life and enjoying every minute of it. I see my ex from time to time and he always stares at me. But I keep moving forward. I don't want him back. I am happy where I am in life. I feel satisfied knowing I made the right decision for myself and stood by it. Be strong :)

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What Guys Said 21

  • To be completely honest with you... I would probably attempt suicide. I know that's not a very helpful or motivational answer but it's probably the truth for my case.
    I'm generally a very forgiving person. I certainly wouldn't break up with my fiancé if she had a one-night stand or something silly like that. However, if she had a serious affair with another guy where actual feelings are involved, it would become very hard to stay together. Of course I would still try to mend the relationship because I love her to death but I also know that you can only save a relationship if both partners pull on the same rope. If one person doesn't want the relationship anymore and falls out of love, there's absolutely nothing the other person can do. So it wouldn't be so much the cheating itself but rather the breakup that would emotionally ruin me. I'm way too much invested in my current relationship to be able to quit it again. It might seem a little unhealthy but I just love my fiancé so much. I don't think I could ever find another girl, let alone such a perfect one. And since I had to go through 5 years of being single and loneliness before this relationship (as an early-20s person, that's a freaking long time), I don't want to experience that again. I'd rather be dead.

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  • I would fuckyoubitchI'mout faster than you could say "hey, wasn't this dude here?"

    I have a zero tolerance policy for cheating. It's one of the few areas in life I truly believe is quite simply black and white - either you don't cheat and thus fix the problems or just leave, or you are a scummy peace of shit. Simple.
    And I have no room or time for scummy peaces of shit.

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  • I'd feel pretty bummed out that I wasted so much time on such a loser. Admittedly I probably would be livid, but at the same time I'd probably do nothing because I wouldn't want to waste any more time thinking about someone who doesn't deserve it. Sorry about what happened to you, it sucks now but it will be for the best.

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  • Only read the first paragraph. I would dump her, end of story lol. Had it been one person, only one time. I might be willing to consider hearing her out if she came to me about it. But if I found out on my own? Done with her. Cut all lines of communication. I'm someone who generally stays friendly with ex girlfriends. But if that happened... can't be friends. I won't talk shit behind her back. But I'll be open about what happened and leave it at that.

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  • I've been cheated on and I just sent her a mean text telling her I know, I instantly dumped her, told our mutual friends what she did completely cut her off from my life.

    I don't think trying to get revenge, the best thing is to just completely remove that person from your life so you can move on.

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  • Well my life didn't revolve around her, but my first girlfriend lost her v-card, while i didn't lose mine. It hurt for a few months but after i got over it and moved on rather quickly.

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  • What would I do you ask? I would drop her like a bad habit

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  • I would personally NEVER let my life revolve around another... Thats how men/women get bored of each other and then start looking for other options... People are fickle like that, we're never satisfied...

    I would leave quietly... WHY? Because when you act like you don't give a fuck for some reason it drives people crazy... and makes them want to be with you. He'll call back, but just for sex. Don't let the sweet talk fool you...

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  • Id toss her shit out and completely cut her out until I feel that im ready to talk. I would NOT take her back though.

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  • I would just leave, cut them from my life, and never look back. As much as I would LOVE getting aome kind of revenge, I'm not conniving enough to pull anything off.

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  • Yes leave him. 3 girls shows he's not sorry for what he did. Best you do is move on and better yourself and let him see what that piece of shit missing. Sorry your going through this.

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  • I would probably try to sleep with cousin, or sister that would be the only way to forgive, or just feel like a Guy again, not like a dumb fuck

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  • I wouldn't break up with that girl.

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  • Dump a bucket of ice water on them and throw their stuff out. Lol jk. I would leave them and tell them to never talk to me again/

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  • breakup with them on the spot and never look back

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  • audi 500

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  • I would move on and take time to heal.

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  • Open relationship.

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  • Get drunk and have sex

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  • I had that happen to me exactly. Wow that is weird. Let them do what they want it's a free country. Go no contact. know that the relationship is over. Go no contact ghost mode (they will finally appreciate what you do for them ) Let them talk to you ONCE after about three to four months. make plans, Make like there is a glimpse of hope and smash it to a billion prices. Just a little taste of their own medicine. It's them thinking the safety net is there and boom it not. they always come back to talk or to see what's going on. Hope you are OK after they have someone else's sent on them.

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    • 1mo

      Well put

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    • 1mo

      @matt1209 doubt it would teach him a lesson, truth is I don't want to hurt him
      and the thing is he still thinks I'm the villain for not "loving him enough" to accept that and get back with him and he also thinks that I was pretending to love him this entire time, at least that's what he said

    • 1mo

      Sounds like he's trying to shift the blame on you to not look so bad. It's not your fault, he's dishonest scumbag. I see your nice person don't let him make you feel bad. Hope everything gets better for you.

  • Make like a tree and leave

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What Girls Said 14

  • First of all, my life would NOT be revolving around some guy who is not my husband. That is key number 1. Number 2, I would just leave him alone, give him back anything that he gave me, block his number, delete it and move on. No need to hold on to somebody who is a fake, a lair, sneak and conniving user. Overall where he goes is not my business, unless it warrants it. Who he sees is not my business unless it warrants it. What he does is not my business unless it warrants it.

    I don't believe in premarital sex or cohabitation. So that would not apply to me. I would not get emotionally attached to him so quickly, but gradually with cautious steps. In fact, I would have already ancitipated and known that he would cheat and do this before I'd even date him.

    My suggestion for this question is this: Don't seek revenge, don't argue, don't fight to hold on. A man or woman is not worth you dying, getting sick, getting sent to the hospital, going to jail and losing your salvation for. A family friend of mine is in jail now for not paying child support. Because he wanted to do what he wanted to do, and have kids with different women. You just quietly leave and go on with life as usual. However when the relationship has been sexual and you gave your heart and soul for that person through soul ties, its tough. It will be something you will have to live with for the rest of your life. But you will still have no choice but to move on.

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  • s2.quickmeme.com/.../...16e7d271bc781e94c4197d.jpg

    I'd also probably say some shit to cut em' real deep. REAL. DEEP. Oh also gimme your keys and get outta my apartment. Like... now muthafucka.

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  • I could Never.. Get Past it.
    It would Haunt me like a Bad demon Inside. It's not that I hold Grudges but I just Could not Wrap my Head around this, my Heart, that Somehow We Would have to Start.. Over. If All possible.
    Good luck and Great question, @iloveyoursmilexx

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  • I would let go and walk away. Karma would take care of the rest... I would not seek revenge because "an eye for an eye' attitude makes the entire world blind... be the bigger person, walk on, move forward and find someone who you deserve and who deserves you.

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  • I'm really stupid when it comes to relationships and I would probably stay lol. It would really depend on how much I wanted this person in my life. But seeing that I'm in a hypothetical relationship with them, I do want them. I would sit them down and talk, ask them to say everything they've done and has lied about. If it was only in the cheating department and not their name or something. I'd stay and tell them that we should have an open relationship. I know that some guys and girls can't handle themselves (this sounded a bit rude, sorry bout it) and it's not a big deal. If it is then they should see a therapist

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  • Skeedadle the fuck on outta there. Nope. Noooope. There's nothing for you there, so you can literally only move forward. It might be the most cliched and overused tactic, but seriously - move on with your life, no matter how hard and bleak it seems. There is almost no better revenge than to live a good life without him. However you want to grieve, don't let it consume you. Good luck.

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  • I would talk to him to get some answers or something until my mind is somewhat satisfied.

    Then, I would block him, and so on.
    It will take me probably a year or two completely forget him

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  • I'd feel betrayed and upset.
    I'd break up with him immediately and never look back.

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  • I'd tell him to hit the road and don't come back

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  • I would definitely leave them but I'd probably be really pissed off.

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  • dumb his ass, I ain't got time for bastards

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  • Revenge, scream and shout and leave.

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  • i didn't have to read whole question to give this answer - f*ck him. the end. he cheated with 3 girls, even one time cheating is bad, not to mention this.

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  • I'd block him on every social media, then delete him and give away anything that he gave me during the relationship, move on with my life get a makeover and go out to distract myself until the morning stage is over
    after that I'd consider dating again

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    • 1mo

      that's exactly what I did... is there any other way. And don't listen to music for a month so that it doesn't bring you back to the break up blues stage

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