What would you do if you did something that ruined your reputation (probably) for good and everyone knew about it?

Say something happened and everyone started thinking you were crazy, even your friends started abandoning you. What would you do?

  • Go into hiding
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  • Move countries
    13% (7)15% (7)14% (14)Vote
  • Lie to everyone and pretend it didn't happen
    9% (5)6% (3)8% (8)Vote
  • Do nothing
    45% (24)56% (27)50% (51)Vote
  • Other (specify)
    14% (7)13% (6)13% (13)Vote
And you are? I'm a GirlI'm a Guy
Updates:
1mo What happened:
About a year and a half ago I went on a few dates with a guy I met at University. At the end of the third date he said something about your first rejection is the hardest, which was probably a rejection but I didn’t take it as one because I’d been rejected before. So he ended up leading me on for a few days and want to his house and stayed for a few hours one the day. Basically when I was there he kept groping me even after I told him to stop.
1mo He didn’t rape me or anything, but it didn't really register what had happened. A few weeks later he messaged me on fb apologizing for leading me on at all. I don't know why I agreed to meet up with him but I did anyway, but did anyway and the same thing happened again.
22d bump
19d Last update

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Reading the updates... how are you to blame? At worse you were naive/ made a mistake to meet/trust him. At worse he sexually assaulted you. And thats not your fault (going by what youve said).
    If this started being a problem with people hearing the his side then just let people know the truth about him (your side)

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    • 27d

      Thanks :), you're comment has definitely made me feel better

Most Helpful Girl

  • I really wanna know what you did.

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    • 1mo

      Just read your update. How exactly does that ruin your reputation?

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    • 26d

      Thank you for the MH!

    • 26d

      No problem :)

What Guys Said 22

  • DO nothing. Even if you are to blame. It will work itself out. It's not the end of the world. You'll be alright!

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    • 1mo

      Thanks, that's encouraging :)

    • 1mo

      I have been slandered a lot recently. Some of it is true. It is all very bad. But, I do nothing, I go about my day, I work hard. People tell me they hear the words being spoken and they laugh at the person saying them. Just go on and keep doing what you;re supposed to be doing. It'll work itself out, and you will find relief.

  • That depends on two things.

    1. Am I actually acting crazy? Like, am I doing things that people constantly advise me against, and just ignoring it? Because maybe it's a good idea to take a step back and make an honest assessment of my behavior.

    2. Have I been presenting myself as somebody that I'm not, and I've been found out? If so, I should really stop doing that shit, and present myself as who I actually am, and make some new friends who like who I am.

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  • One of the facts of life is that everything is transient... Look at Donald Trump. Less than a month ago, he was like The Groper in Chief. But that was like 4 weeks ago - a universe of time.

    There are only two reputations that you need to keep intact and not fuck-up.
    1. Your reputation with your employers because, if you blow that, you lose your job AND find it hard to get another similar job.
    2. Your reputation with your spouse.

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    • 1mo

      30 years ago, I was working with a 20 year old kid (I was 23) and he was very cynical, but he said something that really lays it bare:

      "If it doesn't feed me, fuck me, or get me high, then I don't care about it."

      His point was that he was rather apathetic about stuff, but his comment is actually an amazing way to think to get rid of social stress - the kind that invites G@G questions like this one.

      So, looking at the question again:
      "What would you do if you did something that ruined your reputation (probably) for good and everyone knew about it?"

      To answer this question, you should ask yourself this question:
      "Now that I've irreparably lost my reputation, what is the worst thing that can happen? Will it impact my ability to eat? My ability to buy clothes or find shelter or pay my bills?"

      If the answer is 'No', then don't worry about it because, in the end, it's not important. Friends are a dime a dozen and you can always make more new ones...

    • 1mo

      Thank you :)

    • 1mo

      Reminds me of something my friend's stepdad used to say:

      "See the world through the eyes of a dog. If you can't eat it, fight it, or fuck it, piss on it."

  • I don't really have a reputation to begin with so I would lose nothing, but the best thing to do in that situation is to just own up to it and act like you're proud of it.
    i. e. you got caught on a video webcam chat naked and someone took a picture of it and anyone who confrnots you about it or laughs at you just smile and say yep I am a slut or whatever and I am proud of it. You shit yourself on video and everyone in real life you know sees it act like its no big deal and make everyone a nice baked cake or pie or whatever and sneak lots of laxativies in it then everyone who eats it will shit themselves.

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  • The only reputation I have that can actually be 'ruined' is in World of Warcraft. And it can't be ruined anymore than what it already is.

    I'm a WoW legend. You may have heard of me.

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    • 29d

      No, I don't play WoW

  • Nothing! It would have been for something that was worth it..

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  • I would do nothing, acted like it didn't bother me. And eventually it will just go away and people will forget about it

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    • 1mo

      What if it's been over a year and people are still going on about it?

  • Leave. Up sticks and leave.

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  • Do nothing just admit to what i knew was either right or wrong. People can say or do anything it's our word against theirs.

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  • I already don't have any friends so just another day.

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  • own it. make fun of it yourself, before others can. it´s the eminem strategy.

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    • 1mo

      This, wear it as a badge of honor.

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    • 1mo

      Fuck them xD you should ridicule them for that. As if they never had bad luck.

    • 29d

      I don't know what to do to them though

  • I'd do nothing. I'd own my baggage and continue living life! :-D

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  • I would own it. Fuck those who don't support you.

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  • I wouldn't worry about it cause i don't give a shit what people think of me that right there should tell people i care about myself

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  • I don't care what others think of me, so nothing

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  • I'd go into hiding in my cardboard box house that I made in my room

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  • What can you do?

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    • 1mo

      Not much

    • 1mo

      Mainly just the options in the poll; there's probably a few I've forgotten.

  • Move on...

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  • Actions speak louder than words... That is all

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  • Be bad. You don't have to hide. At least you can polarize your personality now.
    Look at Mike Tyson or Trump. Look at the freedom they have.
    Be yourself, don't hide. Who cares what other people think. Fuck them. I've been cross analyzed for so long that at this point, it would be a relief to be demonized. That way I can become a demon. At least there wouldn't be blacks or whites. Whether what they are saying is true or not. I'd become what they said of me, maybe even worse. I just need to know what they are saying.

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    • 26d

      Isn't that why you were dating? Doesn't that usually eventually happen with guys when you move to the next base? If not, why not break up and date someone else that behaves like you want?

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    • 26d

      I don't know. I guess he was pretty clear about what he was looking for. You can either stay with him or not. Your choice,

    • 24d

      Um I'm not with him.

  • They aren't very good friends if the abandon you so easily.

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  • Depends what it is. If it's something like accusing me of rape, child molestation, or murder then I would sue because that would really screw up my life.

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What Girls Said 17

  • Just on Here, Dear, where it Was not Me who Tried to "Ruin Anyone," hun, but Friends who I had Considered More than a Fellow Follower/Following. This is Why, no Lie, I Try Not to get too Close to anyone. I only Choose a Few Choice Friends from Day One. Just Because One may have a lot of Followers, doesn't Mean "Friends to the Ends."
    I Merely just Handle any of This with Kid gloves. Like I do Everything else on here, or Outside of Gag Town. But as Wise as I am, Smart as I am Known to be, I am Quick to Change and Rearrange "Certain" things to Get back on the Whack Track."
    I don't Make this my Life's Mission to Ruin "Anyone's Good name. They will End up themselves by Tripping over their own Big Feet, when they Go out and Attempt To... Defeat.
    lol I am Not like Huma who is Now M. I. A I stay and Face the Public Eye.
    Good luck and Great question. xx

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  • Hold your own and ride it out, everyone at one stage has done something that may have ruined them, though it says a lot of who your true friends are. A real friend will stick by you no matter what unless you've killed someone or hurt a child, which i presume you haven't..

    Everyone will have their day.. its up to you to change that negative into a positive and come out the other side a mature and strong person

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    • 1mo

      Thanks for the encouragement

    • 1mo

      Whatever u did , it's in ur own mind.. u didn't harm a kid or kill someone... so ur fine!! You'll look back and always feel embarrassed by whatever it is you had done but the feelings you have now will be a distant memory, you are young.. and anyone that hasn't done one fked up thing in their life is a liar!

      just have to say 'bring it on bitches' smile and put it behind you.. as for your friends I suggest you reevaluate who your real friends are.. those who aren't cut them out your life.. think about it is it really as bad as u think it is? Nothing shocks me anymore and as you get older you'll think same way.. call it a blip and look for to 2017 where it be in the past

  • Ha I've been there. But I didn't let them bring me down. I focused on me and you know what I learned that I have some pretty amazing friends. I can only say I have about 3 friends but you know what I'd rather have 3 real friends than the ones that I had before. I went to the gym and worked out my frustrations I got a new job that made me happy. I started planning trips. I focused on long term goals.

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    • 1mo

      Thanks, that's good advice, I'll do it

    • 1mo

      It's hard but when you find something to concentrate on it gets easier

  • Keep your head up and keep going.
    If you made a mistake admit to it, if you still think you did the right thing then stand by that if people ask

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  • I might fight back and prove if i was right but if i was wrong then either suck up and admit it (and go hiding for a while) or if i can't do anything then just move from there.

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    • 1mo

      Thanks 😊

    • 1mo

      You are welcome and as for me, i would only go hiding if it was a huge mistake to keep my mind refreshed and reflect on my actions. But always know that there are many people who you can talk to, never give up because we are humans and everyone does mistakes. Life is hard but it goes on no matter what

  • E) other. Fix whatever behavior that came off as crazy.

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    • 1mo

      Thank you 😊

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    • 29d

      He keeps telling people I'm crazy because of it.

    • 29d

      What an ass.

  • Ask the people who matter and God to forgive me, come to terms with it and move on. Ignore the rest of people who feel the need to comment/look down on me

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  • move on. if my friends were really that f*cking dumb, then i guess we shouldn't have been friends. i'm not apologizing for anything because society's view of me does not count under circumstances.

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    • 1mo

      any...

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    • 21d

      Thanks you 😊

    • 21d

      you're welcome. :D

  • Try to fix the issue, whatever it is.

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    • 29d

      Thanks 😊

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    • 28d

      And if your "friends" Don't believe you and are abandoning you then I don't think they're people you want to be calling your friends anyways.

      Sometimes the bad shit that happens in life end up helping us cull our social circles so only the worthwhile ones are left.

    • 27d

      Thanks :)

  • Forget about it and move forward, what's done is done there's no changing the past. And as for "friends" abandoning you they can't be much of a friend unless I murdered someone they knew.

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  • I went into hiding in high school.

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  • Deny, deny, deny. The more you deny, the more people will believe you. I have exes that I pretend I never dated, and everyone has completely forgotten that I ever dated that ex.

    Friend: "Hey, didn't you date Wa--"
    Me: "Nope."

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  • i would put a new sex video out

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    • 1mo

      Lol, I'm not going to do that

  • Depends what it is? And honestly, I've been through or seen people go through stuff like this and it seems like it'll never go away but it does. Well, people will still remember obviously, but nobody cares after a while and it stops being a subject and just become a matter of fact thing that happened before and everybody is over now.
    I've seen pregnant 13 year olds, girls who gave head to a bunch of guys at once, a girl who went crazy cut herself and was running round outside screaming and shouting, some other girl who went crazy and ran outside in her pj's shouting then ran off and jumped on a bus, some boy who had some mental health episode went to hospital was really a crazy time then, loads of stuff basically, and honestly now nobody cares and they just slipped back into "normal" life again.

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    • 1mo

      Thank you 😊

    • 1mo

      It's ok. Don't worry, people will stop talking. Especially if you just act like normal and hold your head high and show NO shame. We all do shit we'd rather have not done or wish had been different, so nobody can say anything to you, the only difference is some peoples things are out in public and others are inside behind closed doors. Fuck em, they'll get over it, you don't need to feel a way, just act like normal and don't act embarrassed. It's their problem, not yours.

  • Well, I did nothing when my friend told half the school that I self-harmed. I didn't do anything when one of her friends reported my relationship with a pedophile to the principal. I just stood by and watched, and there's nothing wrong with that. People got bored of bullying me, and the police dismissed the case. Sometimes all you can do is NOTHING.

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    • 1mo

      Sounds nice but some people dont give up on teasing and they treat you like the "anytime joke" whenever they want one.

    • 1mo

      @iceEverestere yeah that's true

    • 1mo

      @iceEverestere Well those people gave up, and I judged (knew) that they would.

  • Do nothing more to give them reasons to think of you as crazy, but I'd try to see if I really overreacted and why is that.

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  • Delete all social media, change my number and only give to friends and family, not talk about it or give it any attention, and if needed, move schools/work depending how bad it was bad how much stress it was causing

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