I can't name a single reason why people want to children. Children annoy me in general. If I did have children, they would hate me. But it's worse because I'm an introvert. I can't imagine having to spend all day at a job where I have to interact with people just to come home and have children to deal with. People make me feel physically tired. After a day of interacting with people, I will want to relax with a favorite tv show and dark chocolate. Not clean up a dirty house for the third time that day. My younger brother is a complete brat so I hope all your children are better. I feel really bad for the parents who have had a bad day at work, just to go home and have to clean up their children's messes. That's not even the worst part. I've heard young kids say hurtful things to their parents. How do you handle it? I asked my childfree by choice group and the best answer I got was that they take it a little bit at a time.
How do parents handle children?
What Guys Said 11
I think what you fail to see is that children aren't just annoying, they also give you an incredible amount of energy (not physical energy but emotional and "spiritual" energy for the lack of a better word). My mom has often told me that my siblings and I have helped her through difficult phases in her life. This works on two levels. Firstly, children give you a lot of emotional strength, similar to a loving relationship or a very deep friendship (but even stronger than that because they're not "strangers" you met on campus but your own flesh and blood). Secondly, being a good parent necessarily efforts being very grown up in a lot of ways. Maybe you think you're already grown up but not even remotely as grown up as you'd be as a mom. That's not a personal criticism, it's true for every person on this planet. Being a good mom/dad means to be incredibly organized, disciplined, responsible and many other things. My girlfriend has been babysitting little children as a side-job next to her university education for the past 2 years and I can see a huge difference. We were both already mature and grown-up people before that but she's got quite an edge over me now. For example stressful situations (such as a child wetting itself in public) used to scare her in the beginning and I know I would feel very stressed in such a situation but after 2 years, my girlfriend handles all these situations like a boss and with the patience of a buddha. So in short: children force you to grow as a person. They force you to step outside of your comfort zone and thereby improve yourself. Together with the love that naturally exists between parents and their children, this is something very positive about kids. Something that cannot be replaced by a pet or an adult friend. I also believe it's probably not possible to fully grasp the intensity of these positive effects unless you experience them yourself.
Furthermore, forgive me but I have to bring up your age here: Being 19, it is natural you want to travel and have fun. That's the purpose of our late teens and early 20s. People at this age want to travel, have casual sex, try drugs, be crazy etc.. That's all cool. However, at one point - and I can tell you this because I am myself currently at this point - you start to feel deep inside that you get older. I don't feel like partying or being wild anymore. I still love traveling but I can also do that with my future children. I do feel an urge to settle down. And (cont.)0
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I'd say the best way to go about it would be to learn how to get them to feel invested in doing something so that they have fun, and have fun with them having fun or something
As for toddlers? No fucking clue. Screamers will be the death of me.3
Once kids are about 8 or 9, I think they can be really fun, depending on your interests. They almost always have enough energy to do stuff and most things are new to them, so they are more open to trying stuff.
I enjoy playing board games with them, sports, and doing crafts sometimes. It depends on the person, if you have good behavior management skills to get them to cooperate more.
It can be difficult at first when it is someone else's kid, because they aren't used to how you like things done, but if you had your own, you could teach them what is important to you. Putting in more effort at first makes it a lot easier in the long run, and then it becomes enjoyable.
Plus it can be fun to see how excited they get over stuff.1
Some can, some can't. Just that simple. It really takes a lot of patience. Ill be lucky to be able to handle my nephew well, but maybe he will be a quiet child.1
Fuck if I know1
I dont know i just do it. When i was in the scouts i managed 10 kids at a time. You just keep busy with them and play games with them like hide and seek and shit.1
They have to want them. It's not for everyone.1
What Girls Said 9
You are aware that introverts have kids too, lol. I am an introvert, and though I don't have kids, I've spent a fair portion of my life working around them. I don't consider them annoying. Just like adults, they have their moments where they are sweet and loving AND quiet, and then they can be the total opposites. Not too many adults or kids including yourself are just one note where they only ever show one side of themselves 100% of the time. I just spend the holidays with my 2 year old nephew and he had so many different moods throughout the day from fantastic to tantrum. You deal with them like you also learn to deal with other adults and their moods. You also know kids won't be kids forever. You don't find many 8+ year olds having full on tantrums like 2 year olds. They grow and change and you grow and change with them.1
I have a child, and love her. But I am not a kid friendly person to other kids. The constant, crying, screaming, picking them up and holding them annoy. And I dont like having to clean up after anyone. My daughter never gives me any problem, she is 10 and I can honestly say that she wasn't a problem child like most kids I come across crying every 5 minutes.2
If children are being that intolerable, their parents aren't finding what motivates them to behave. They are either being neglected, abused, confused, spoiled, or what I call, raised by "distracted" parents. These kids grow up to be a burden to themselves and others as adults because they were not given a proper and safe structure to emotionally develop.2
My goodness girl, you sure you don't hate kids? These rants are getting scary! I'm not a parent, but I'm a nanny, a godparent, and an aunt. So I'm around children all the time. All the parents I know have gone through a rough patch or two, but they've all said that they wouldn't trade their kids for the world. For some people, it's just worth it.1
Discipline, love, and a lot of patience.3
Hey, parenthood isn't for everyone, and that's ok.
It is what it is.1
Just don't have children...1
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