Do I stay away or keep trying?
What do you do when your mate tells you that they need space from you? My boyfriend told me he needs space from me, I'm torn on what I should do. every time he gets mad he says he's done and then when he cools off, he comes back. This is killing me emotionally, I'm tired of the roller coaster. Any suggestions?
What's Your Opinion?
Most Helpful Opinion
Hearing those words hit hard. I would tend to think when someone needs a break they are looking to evaluate the relationship without you in it. Could be a variety of reasons. However, If someone is asking you to back off, you have 2 choices. Either give them space or walk away.So try a no contact for 2 weeks and see what happens. If he continues not contacting you, he walked away first.Either way sometime in the future you need to have a heart a heart talk and explain that adults just don't keep stating the fact that they are done. It is hurtful to the other.Good Luck..Keep us informed of the progress...
What Guys Said 4
If thi shapens frequently, start tellin him you also need space, and see how he likes spending time alone. .Hopefully it will affect him the same way it affects you, and he will start thinking twice about demanding breaks all the time.And if he doesn't mnd you going on breaks, maybe he's really suggesting you break on a permanent bsais, and maybe wants you to be the one to suggest that; then he doesn't have to take responsibility for ending things.
What do I do?Go work in the garden. I go sailing. I go flying.I go work on the car.I paint oils.I design Architecture that takes hundreds of hours to do. I do almost everything by myself so this doesn't ever come up again.
If he needs space, give him the space. Stop chasing after him. When he's done with the space he needs, he'll be back.You should be totally able to live your life without needing him around 24 hours a day.So give him his space when he needs it.
What Girls Said 3
Remember Einstein's definition of insanity...(continuing to do the same thing and expecting a different result.)
I agree 100% with martyfellow. Your boyfriend isn't being fair to you. I know its hard to just give up on him and walk away because you love him. But him constantly leaving you is a form of selfish behavior. If he cares he would take you into consideration every time he decides to leave. He needs to learn to talk things out. He can't leave because HE wants to, and come back when HE is ready. When is he thinking of YOU in this matter.
You should consider it done and over with now. He is playing games and the games are messing with your heart and your head. You deserve better. Any time someone puts you on an emotional roller coaster it is emotional abuse. You may love him but he will never stop putting you through this. It only ends when you say it does and that means leaving for good.