Why are older guys turned on by innocence?

what is it that makes men want innocence?...is it control or just innocence?


Most Helpful Guy

  • just innocence (IMHO) or more precisely it's novelty renewed through the partner's eyes

    kind of like, I have a bunch of my favorite films on bluray that I've watched a bunch of times, classics mostly, but it's an additional pleasure to see them with someone who's never seen that particular film.


What Guys Said 15

  • "men want"


    I did never look for it. When others look for it I suspect control or insecure guys (or both): innocent girls can't compare.

    • Is innocent too much hard work. No fun

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    • @Question Asker,

      Being a virgin of not has really NO importance. Not a positive one, not a negative one. Same for being experienced or not. The important point is 'How is your relationship with the guy?' What kind of guy do you need?

    • Don't have guy. Like I said want to learn how to pleasure myself.

  • Its all down to maturity, if a girl is mentally mature but still comes across as inexperienced, then these traits can appeal to the so called older man, but if for any reason she looks young and is immature, then this is often something guys wouldn't be attracted to. Even though guys mature a lot slower than women, the only reason older guys go for younger women is because they see them on the same maturity level as themselves, and if I was honest, guys often take a while to grow up, so a 20 year old women could often meet the maturity requirements of a 28 year old man,x

    • wow thanx... but i,m 16yr old virgin who is quite mature and acheing for sexual experience but unsure how to proceed...not even explored myself yet how sad eh?

    • I wouldn't class that as sad, it just goes to prove that you have a lot of self worth, and exploring yourself will come in time, just because you havent, does not mean you have to, and being a virgin is one of the single most valuable compliments you could pay your first boyfriend, he will be proud to be considered to be worthy of you, so take your time in this department,x

    • feel like time has run out I have urges but no clue how to quel them alone but ta

  • Depends on the person. I'm pretty old by GAG standards and I like innocence because it seems like part of my youth. It's something we lose and miss as we get older, so we find it really appealing in other people.

    Control types are another animal entirely. I can't stand control freaks. For them it's probably about control and being the one to destroy/consume that innocence. People like that scare the bejeepers out of me.

    • As far as sex is concerned, I had the privilege once, of giving a girl I was dating her first big O. Gotta say that was pretty special. Getting to experience her awakening to that aspect of herself was really really neat.

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    • Sorry. Wish I could help more. Good luck!

    • Been so nice already thanks

  • Sounds like a pedophile to me. Look, if you're like 16 and you have a 30 year old guy who is showing you attention, then assume that he's taking advantage of you. There are no exceptions.

    • and how old are you sensible dude? but yes I would never be that stupid ..well I hope not tho i,m very very inexperienced ooops

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    • When I was 17 my girlfriend was 16. since I turned 21 I haven't dated any under 21, and I don't even do 21 anymore. 23 is as young as I can go now.

    • dont go for guys who arnt in your stage of life, it just gets weird, if your in (what Americans call) high school then stay away from the college guys, if your in college then stay away from the guy who is old enough to have a family, it gets too awekward otherwise and can be very creepy if your in high school and he's in his mid 20's not to mention possibly illegal for Americans who arnt allowed to have sex till 18 lol

  • we have a protect instinct as guys, nothing about control.

  • Why do older guys like innocence? For the same reason younger guys do. They don't like bitter bitches, cheaters, manipulative women, and girls that have f***ed everyone in the apartment complex. Girls that are sweet to them, aren't carrying too much baggage, have some experience but not enough to turn them into a train wreck have the possibility to make decent girlfriends. Being kind of naive/inexperienced means that you probably haven't been played and are still capable of trusting someone, you're not cynical, your defense mechanism are so up that it makes you undatable. You're still capable of love...

    As to you being 16, if older men are chasing you I'm guessing they just see you as naive and easy to take advantage of and have no moral boundaries in their mind when it comes to jail bait. =/

    • *aren't

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    • Thanks lots of interesting reading but still at a loss on how to excite and arouse myself. All advise welcome

  • Evolution.

    Men naturally want younger women as it means they're more fertile.

    Innocence is a trait of youth. The two naturally go together.

    • Had many virgins then. Are they better sex doubt iy

    • they're not no. But the quality of the sex is quite irrelevant to that sort of base primal thinking.

  • Innocence is both all powerful but needs protection. Innocence is potential.

    An innocent boy turns into a Tyrant personality or a King.

    I don't know the female shadow archetype but I know the light archetype is the Queen.

    I think men still believe that a long time ago when we were living in tents and caves for thousands of years It was only a few people to compete with over someone young, vigorous and youthful and that at that time it was likely that a young girl would probably have stayed with you for a long time and even all your life. Things are not the same anymore. There are countless people alive now.

    • wow in depth buddy but thanx.. is it best to go for guy with experience or fellow virgin to losemy innocencse?

  • it has nothing to do with control. I think a part of it is that it makes us feel dominant and powerful in contrast to her innocence. A part of us wants to take that innocence too (sexually that is).

    • wow is it not too much hard work with girl that doesn't know what she's doing..is virgin tighter than experienced girl by much...does it hurt you both? you had many virgins?

  • Because they won't be compared to other guys.

  • Perhaps you should ask Chris Hansen.

  • Not me. A smart girl turns me on

    • Is s smart virgin good then. Had any virgins

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    • You are young...under 18 and will have to ask someone your age or a female. I will say use clitoral stimulation but I do not feel that I should say anything too specific and or graphic. I just realized it said under 18

    • I am in UK 16 is legal. Where is my clit friends and how do I simulate

  • To some, it's like fresh snow. You can make the first tracks.

    • You had many virgins. Nicely put by the way.but id it not hard work teaching

    • Like coloring the white snow yellow? Maybe.

    • Really are yours men or girl . Are you male or female.

  • Its hard to explain but men like to protect girls, its a natural instinct for most men, and when we see a shy/innocent girl a lot of guys think its cute and feel the need to protect her. I don't even know why myself, but I just really like shy/innocent girls. I think its because of biology and evolution over time, where men have traditionally been the hunters/fighters and women have been the ones to stay at home/watch the kids. Not saying that's what its like now, but that's how it was and still is in some places before the modern world. Generally speaking, women are more submissive then men, that's just how we are made and of course there are exceptions.

    I feel like this is a needlessly complicated answer and I still didn't answer your question good but I really don't know why, we just like innocence.

    • very profound so have you experienced a virgin then...are they not worse than experienced lovers?

    • is an experienced lover better than inexperienced one tho for virgin like me?

What Girls Said 5

  • Depends. Some guys are just weird and they really do just like feeling like they can control her and manipulate her because she hasn't been exposed to as much. Some guys find her lack of exposure refreshing because they don't have to worry about dealing with a bunch of baggage.

    • wow were you exploited as virgin then...i,m virgin and don't want older guy well i,m not sure ..is experience better or younger fellow innocence?

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    • If you want to go into further depth, then you'll have to pm me. I'm not broadcasting my sexual experience for GAG.com to tune in on lol

    • wow thanks so much added you as friend if that's ok...how old are u? your deff a girl yes?

  • Honey I will tell you don't rush into anything! Sex is a great thing when you are ready for your and I don't think you are ready for it yet! And please don't lose your V card to a 30 year old man! I remember your question from yesterday! lol You shouldn't feel rushed into having sex or feel like you have to prove anything!

    • I don't but I have so many urges. Need to learn how to satisfy myself to stop the desires but no one will advise help

    • Honey it's not rocket science just put your finger down there and play around!

    • I have tried but nothing happens sorry I am dumb. Tried one finger in me but really tight and rubbish. What else is there

  • Come on, lets get real, the only reason an older guy would want to be with a younger chick is because they can take advantage of them and manipulate them into thinking it's something more they have going on. But, in reality they just want to bang them.

    • Smart answer here.

    • Makes lots of sense but is an experienced lover not best. Cos I'm so naive I don't even know how to pleasure myself yet. Sad eh

  • For some, it makes them feel powerful -- as in they get to teach the girl to do whatever they like the most, instead of her having formed her own opinions through life experiences. Guys who go for underage girls are also usually less adapt than their peers for picking up women, so they feel more confident going for women who are uncertain about dating.

    • That makes lots of sense but is not experience in lover better than a learner. I can't talk as I don't even know how to pleasure myself. Sad eh

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    • Tried and struggling to find and stimulate understand your age worry but I need guidance in self pleasure please help me

    • Like I said, look it up online... There is this book "Because It Feels Good" that is a great resource, as well.

  • They like that tight vagina

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    • Only if it's painful for one of you. Otherwise it's a plus.

    • Who does it hurt most. You had many virgins