My body image is very very poor :( because of my f*****g spine. The fact that I will never have a perfect body is driving me crazy! What do you think? How do you deal with it, if you were in my shoes?
Pictures are on my profile!
To Sib999: My experience with doctors is almost the same - they told me that there is no chance to fix it, it can only get worse, I felt so frustrated and hopeless after these words :(. And yes, I live in a cold climate :).
Most Helpful Girl
I feel you. I was born with scoliosis, a spine deformity I inherited from my mother. Mine's an inverted S shape along my back, which can be seen easily unless I take measures to hide it.
I was diagnosed when I was getting into high school. The doctor was very blunt and hopeless. He basically said I had to attach myself to an orthopedic device and hang onto it -6 hours a day- and spend the rest of the day laying in bed... but even if I did that, I'd never be a "normal" girl.
I left the doctor's office in tears. I was already very shy back then, to the point people made me anxious. Add that to not having friends, and getting into a whole new school.
"I hate the way she walks", said a sophomore to her friends while I was passing through. "What'cha looking at?" I was looked at like some circus freak. A classmate once pushed me to make his friends laugh. I was miserable for years.. and I blamed a big part of it to my condition.
However.. near the end of high school, I met a few people who were different. They didn't judge me. They were friendly, just like that.
With them, I started to grow more outgoing. I stopped caring about what people would think or say. I got confidence.
And that confidence... boy that's all I could ever need. Being confident in yourself, you look good no matter how your body is. Just like that. Being confident, you can talk to people just like that. Being confident, you become attractive, just like that!
I finally listened to my mother's advice on clothing and looks. Due to my condition I only wore loose clothes. I learned to pick nice clothes that hide my curvature. Oh boy, the lesson was well learned. Now at university, I feel like a completely different person. And it shows through! I have no trouble speaking with people anymore. I walk proudly, even if I'm short. I look better because I learned how to dress and make up, not to mention I feel confident about myself. If someone still stares at me with a weird look, I don't care anymore! Screw you, I'm f***ing gorgeous! And it shows through - specially for the opposite sex.
So please, don't ever think you're at a "disadvantage" or you're "not attractive". If you accept yourself, people will accept you.
I have to say you have it easier being a guy (not being sexist, I'm merely talking about looks/clothing) but I think you can get away with it like this:
- Don't wear very tight shirts. If you live in a cold climate, try 2 pieces of clothes. A good coat is hot.
- Take care of your posture. Walk tall and proud! This also helps for your confidence.
- Try carrying a pocket mirror when you shop for clothes. It'll help you find out if you're trying on something that shows your deformity. (Looked at your pics though, I think you'll get by without too much effort! - not to mention you look great!-)
But the most important, and I can't stress it enough: just be confident! If silly me could do it, there's no way you can't!