Is it more masculine to hook up with lots of girls?

Just sex with no commitment, I mean.

Does it make a guy more masculine to be into no-strings-attached sex with as many girls as possible? Is it wuss-like to rather be seriously dating one girl before having sex?

I mean, I'm a guy, I have my impulses, don't get me wrong--but I would much rather be in a real relationship, with a cute nice girl, who I know loves me.


What's Your Opinion?


What Girls Said 51

What Guys Said 32

  • Selected as most helpful

    Not at all.

    I see a lot of guys my age that are with one girl one day, then the next the next day ... in short, they change them more often than underwear. This sort of behavior is a turn-off for MOST girls (at least the decent ones). Not only will they have no trust for you, but you will seem insecure, flimsy, undecisive and superficial. Well, that, my friend, is the exact opposite of being masculine.

    I also see several guys who are in good, stable relationship and act well towards their girlfriend. They're protective of them, seem happy and loving. They have also decided on ONE girl, which makes me think they must have strong and determined characters, and definitely know what they want. Such guys I see as far more masculine.

    The myth that men who hook up with a lot of women are "studs" might have been true once. But it looks pretty idiotic these days - this is also true for women who go and sleep with a new guy every day.

    It says a lot about the person ... and it isn't good things.

    So if you want to be in a serious, long-lasting relationship, go for it. :) Most girls would feel respect for a guy like you.

  • IT IS NOT MORE MASCULINE TO HOOK UP WITH LOTS OF GIRLS! haha..if your guy friends are telling you this, well, look around and see if they have any girls serious about being in a relationship with them. I think that it makes you a lot stronger as a person and a male to be able to save those impulses for when you are in love with someone. Think about takes a lot more strength and control for that doesn't it. You're not a wuss, you're just a decent human being. Keep doing what you're doing.

  • No.

  • In my opinion, it is very repulsive when you know a guy has been with more girls then you can count. Now, to me it is more masculine when a guy actually takes time to have an enjoyable relationship with a woman without instantly jumping into sex. They savour the time they spend with you before finally getting into making love to you.

  • I wouldn't say masculine...but I prefer a guy with lots of experience with sex! sex is important in arelationship so the more you know and the more practice you have had...makes me a happier woman. I feel being in a real relationship is way better than just lots of no-strings-attached sex but sometimes that's just what you need. Many women are turned off by telling them how many women you have been with, because we then feel like just another fling. So be cautious telling women you have had lots of flings, we want to think you are just that GREAT at sex naturally! LOL!

  • Definitely not!

  • Most definitely not. Sleepng around makes you look disgusting in my book.

  • Definitely not. That's disgusting and a big turn-off.

  • ...Nah...It doesn't make him more masculine... It makes him a man-whore.I don't have a preference for guys who have hooked up with lots of girls in the past. In my point of view, they are weak because they succumb easily to their instincts. Masculinity is not determined on how many girls you have slept with imo.

  • you guys just love making up stories don't you

    its not masculine it's slutty

    • Well it's an honest question right? How am I making up stories? Did you read my last sentence? But thanks for your answer

  • not masculine!

  • no it's definitely not masculine! I hate guys like that. it's sick! grow up! I would not date a guy like that!

  • No. It makes you seem like a douche and I would definitely be having second thoughts about dating you

  • No. some girls like it, others don't. Just as a guy might see a girl that sleeps with a lot of guys as a hoe, some girls see guys that way too, and they might also see you as a player and they won't even bother with you.

  • some girls mite like it others mite not but many girls like guys to who don't hurt them and same thing with guys how would you like it if the girl you liked hooked up with you then walked away and hooked up with every other guy

  • Who cares what other people think. It's your sex life and body, not theirs.

  • No at all, its takes masculinity to hold out for a special girl, rather than several meaningless encounters, as that saying says; "A real man doesn't make love to a million women. A real man makes love to one women a million ways".

  • I don't think so at all. To me, a real man is someone who isn't afraid of expressing himself to a girl, someone who isn't fearful of being loyal, someone capable of having an actual lasting relationship. It takes a lot more strength and intelligence to do any of these things than to simply have sex with anything that moves. Masculinity is defined by strength, not weakness.

  • oh good lord. please don't do that. I don't date guys I've known have hooked up with anything that has 2 legs and walks. it's unhygenic and it shows how emotionally detached he is from having sex that I wouldn't want him and I'd probably tell him to get checked, no offense.

  • Second one. If you get in a serious relationship with a girl that eventually finds out the crap about you where you were with many girls at once, just sex, she'll look at you differently. Sex means much more when you know the personality of who you're having it with.

  • Its not about being more masculine. There are different kinds of guys. The type of guy you want and should be is the one who wants the real relationship with a cute nice girl. None of this sex without commitment.

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  • I don't think that will make you look more masculine but it will do the opposite. You might think that girls are into you but in reality she is into out side world than you and they are using you to peek on the world where you live. You might feel more of women who cares than leading her. That's kind of illusion. If you really want to go out there and explore, you should have a certain rules for yourself. You have to set up the time lines and don't let anyone bothers you. Then you will hit the target all the time without a problem.

  • It is masculine to be emotionally and mentally mature and secure about every facet of your life and have a clear view of the goals and destiny you are trying to achieve for yourself. Having sex with thousands of women or romancing a single woman for the rest of your life are arbitrary in the long run. Relying on others to define YOUR purpose on this planet and YOUR man hood is the fastest way to loosing all meaning in your life. Be the king of your castle!

  • Yes it goes against what most of the gender wants and thinks. It's like the equivalent of a girl who likes to f*** lots of guys. Sure, she can do what she wants and be her own person, but she is certainly not admired by the rest of her gender although she would probably be popular with the opposite gender to an extent.

    I don't think other men will respect you, but you will probably be popular with the girls with that mindset aslong as you don't go overboard with it.

  • its all about what you want out of life dude. masculinity has nothing to do with how many chicks you've been with, or how much you can drink or any of that high school bulls**t. the purpose shouldn't be to rack up numbers of how many chicks you've boned. that's childish and immature. Personally, I don't persue a long term realationship because I'm happy with my lifestyle and haven't meet anyone whom can keep up with me. I don't go out and just look for the first pair of legs. there has to be an attraction. almost primal chemistry. I consider sex an experience like any other we have in life. and what is the purpose of life if not to experience things?

  • That's just ridiculous, plain and simple, of course it doesn't and most girls are looking for guys who don't just want to hook up. I could do ballet dancing in a tight spandex body suit with a penis pattern on it and nobody could ever convince me that I'm not masculine,

    Seriously, look at what is masculine these days, shaved chests, manicured nails and make-up, they even have shaping clothes for guys now. Those are men? Or how about the gits who go out and get p*ssed up and passing out on the street after drooling over any poor unsuspecting girl to cross his path?

    Most of those guys can't even grow a beard, who are they to dictate what is masculine and what is not?

    Be yourself, and forget the rest.

  • After breaking up with my Girlfriend almost 2 years ago, I started hooking up with girls pretty often. Let me tell you, it was a terrible mistake. I never felt "cooler" or "manlier" about it, and am finally realizing that the only thing that will make me happy is to find a great girl to start a real relationship with. Fucking girls doesn't make you manly, but treating women with respect and dignity def. does. Its really up for the guy to do what he wants. No true friend will bug you about not hooking up with girls anyways, so who cares? just my 2 cents

  • Its plain and simple "nice guys finish last" now easy way to put it is that the jerks get the quanity, while the nice guy gets the quality! becuase men fall inferior to the ferks they become impatient and start to act like the jerk to make up for what they feel they have lost. Its the choice you want quanity or quality?

  • Most women assume you're being childish and selfish if all you do is chase tail trying to get laid.

    It's not necessarily a bad thing if you have a sorted past full of girlfriends... this just proves that women love you.

    But if you can't commit to just one girl that tends to be a huge Red Flag for many women.

    I'm a "relationship" guy too, and I learned that it doesn't pay to settle and if it takes hundreds of dates to find that PERFECT girl, then it's worth the risk scaring away a few random girls who don't get it.

    ~ Robby

    My Blog ( link )

  • No, it just means he doesn't want a relationship, just no strings pleasure.

    Nothing wrong with that as long as you don't string girls along.

    It doesn't means you are more of a man... in fact some women would argue that it makes you "Less of a Man"... I'm not into judgement... if it makes you happy DO IT, when it STOPS making you happy, STOP DOING IT.

    When you are young you should experience all kinds of things...

    When you get older you will realize that none of that is important...

    Good luck.


  • I don't know about masculine, but I don't think many girls would find it attractive.

    • I choose to be myself generally, it's just discouraging to see what so many girls want. Well thanks a lot for the encouragement.

    • Don't worry too much. Just put yourself out there more often. And most important, never try to be something you are not.

    • Girls seem to want guys with experience, and I have none...

  • It takes a real man to commit and not whore himself out. Sure there are guys that brag about that sh*t to their buddies but honestly you'll feel better about yourself if you decide to not whore yourself.

  • In my opinion, No. The number of women I have sex with doesn't make me feel more masculine.I think sex with no strings attached was just a phase for me. Now that I'm older, it's much more gratifying to be intimate with a woman I have deep emotional attachement to. This is just my personal opinion and everyone is different.

    • No girl has ever wanted either casual sex or a relationship with're lucky.

  • Based on perception of surrounding males YES! In reality No! Usually a person like that would have substantial difficulty maintaining a serious relationship.

  • hell yeah brotha. but 25-29 I dunno, you might be looking to settle down

    • I see. I'm only 23 but I think as you get older you don't care about being as masculine or have that much of an ego anymore. You just wanna have fun... I cared more when I was 15. So it's not about getting as many girls as possible, just go out and have fun. If you're lucky you'll meet the girl of your dreams.

    • Well, I would be settling down if I had experience, but I have non experience

  • No, anyone who says otherwise is insecure, many guys are so insecure they feel like they need to portray a type of dominance by having as much sex as possible, I mean you would probally get a few crazy stories to tell freinds and a few high fives but if you do this you will never have a real relationship because every girl will expect that you are just trying to play her for sex, and that makes you as un-masculane as it gets.

    • Theres someone out there for everyone bro, just because you havn't found her yet don't give up, and I'm not sure what you are asking about guys like that

    • Good point...but what about the guy that naturally has girls all over him all the time? many guys are like that, no girl has ever liked me or wanted a relationship with me.

  • Lol, I don't need to get with girls to prove I'm a man. I hate it when both males and females lower themselves in order to make it easier for them to get with a girl or a guy. I personally think it is much more masculine to be strong minded, honest, and caring towards girls and be yourself but nowadays who cares about traditional masculinity and femininity, be what you believe is right, not what other people seem to think is right.

    • That's cool, but when you feel like a loser, like I do, you don't know what to believe

  • nope just slutty

    • Why? Girls seem to like these "slutty" guys.

  • I doesn't make a guy to be any masculine to be a womanizer, yeah, that's the word :-) It also means that someone is irresponsible.

    It is all up to your future goals. If you want a serious relationship that would be successful, then there is a way. And someone irresponsible and has no future goals or dreams would rather swing and would not settle with one. That could end up in a mis-fortunate situation at some point of the life.

    • I do want a serious relationship, but I want to make sure I'm not missing out on something so "great" that most guys seem to love, or at least aspire to--having access to as many women as they want.

  • It makes him more attractive as a man to women's eyes. And they will all disagree with me.

    The more girls I was getting, even more girls wanted me on top of that. It's an exponential thing you see. I've seen COUNTLESS girls hook up with guys they know are players and ladies men. The opposite is true as well. A guy that gets no girls, attracts no girls.

    Is it more masculine? I would say arguably so depending on your definition of masculinity. If you wanna take the natural example, the alpha male has all the girls and is in a relationship with all of them, but he's also protecting them all too!

    Is it wuss like? No. As a man, I feel it's more difficult to be in a monogamous relationship once you have confidence and choice of women in your life, especially with your testosterone begging you to spread your seed to every woman it makes you look at.

    I hope this helps bro.

    • What does jealousy have to do with the question or the answer? And the man who's sleeping with lots of women is choosing not to start a relationship with any of the girls even though he knows he could with any of them.

      There's also 2 types of situations that can occur if the woman sleeps with someone else.

      The man cares and he thinks she's a slut so he gets over her.

      The man doesn't care and still sleeps with her anyway because he wants his nut.


      Just trying to be honest !

    • Dude I really see some truth to you logic BUT everyone has their main squeeze, know what I mean? so if she/he goes and sleeps with someone else your telling me you won't get a little jealous? There might always be that one that could've blossomed into a good relation ship but you guys both denied the fact that it might

    • Read the bottom part of my profile, it should help you with your confidence my friend. let me know how it goes!

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  • nope- it isnt.. it is irresponsible. But if ur gonna live that lifestyle, do it to the best of ur ability. The media portrays a guy who has life together as a guy who has a bit of $$$, a few chicks he's banging... that's unrealistic and foolish. Good that you want those things (a real relationship with a girl who will love you back)

    • Hell, it took me YEARS to get confortable arnd women. Primarily because where I grew up, so many of em DID want manwhores, players, thugs, etc... I quit worrying about them, and started dating chicks I found to be pleasing on the inside as well as outside. I met my fiancee at 31 y/o... she was 23. It sounds cliched, I know, but I will say it anyways... Love will find you... even doe ya might havta 'push the envelope' to get it, it will find you.

    • Well, can't do it to the "best of my ability" because I can't even get one girl. Thanks for your answer though.

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