My boyfriend is best friends with his ex. Should I trust him with her?
He says he loves her but is not in love with her.I have been seeing him for 8 months and wen I met him she had moved out of his house but had her things still there.Now she has slowly moved her stuff out and he tells me she knows he is with me but he just wanted her to move on with his help as she was so dependent on him when they were together.She lives 2 hours away from him now and he allows her to come visit when she has problems.Such as how to do her tax or save money blah blah.But she tells him she wants him back and still is in love with him. When she visits she stays the night but he tells me he sleeps on the couch. I never hear from him when she is around. He says I am to trust him and that she is just a friend.If I say anything about the situation he won't talk to me for days cause he says he doesn't need my jealousy. He then says that I can't stake claims on him cause it will make him back off. I really care for him and when we are together we have so much closeness and fun and get on fantastically. But I'm not sure that I can go on like this with her in his life at this level. I have remained friends with some of my ex's and we even attend the same social outings with our new partners and its normal.But this is not normal. They don't have kids or anything that should keep them so close. Its got so bad that I am not ever allowed to question one thing about her without him cutting me off for days as though I should be so understanding and secure about this situation.Would anyone else be? Am I being paranoid and jealous for no reason? Should I believe he just wants to help her? When I'm with him she calls him on the phone over and over. And he answers her. But when he is with her he ignores me.I don't know how to deal with this and be assertive about this without losing him. I wanna be able to set my boundaries about this and allow him to retain his friendship with her if he chooses but to respect how it makes me feel. He says she knows about me and I believe that cause he lives with his 6yr old daughter and she talks about me all the time.But if this is so innocent with her than why is he treating her differently than he does me? I'm so confused. I don't wanna own him or anyone for that matter as I believe people should be allowed to what they want as long as they are truthful about it so the other person can choose their options knowing all the facts.And then that's their choice. I would love some advice about my situation. Can anyone help?
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