How do you know when your boyfriend and girlfriend?

I never really had a real relationship so I don't know how people get to that point of knowing. I mean I date a lot of guys all the time but it had never got to anything serious and now I been seeing this guy for 4 weeks now and he's done more with me than any guy. he calls me everyday just to say and we have sex all the time, he's taking me out, fixed dinner for me, I met his friends and I see him almost every day and he even introduced me as his girl one time last week. Are we together now? Cause I feel it is too early to say so. I mean I've never had a date go this long nor a date who wanted to see me so much and call me everyday. So are we getting serious? And how do I know when we are boyfriend and gf?


Most Helpful Guy

  • "There's no haste for true love" -- meaning don't set a time limit on when you and he are together ^_^

    Enjoy the time you have with him, and don't try to over-analyze things or plan out the future. Accept it for what your heart says it is; if you like this guy like you say you do, everything will be fine ^_^

    If it's starts messing with your head and you feel like you can't eat or sleep because you don't have an answer, asking him if you two are "official" would be a great way to approach the question -- Additionally, he shouldn't get mad about you asking, if anything he will smile.


What Guys Said 8

  • I've had women that wanted to be "asked" to be a guy's girlfriend. Much like proposing but less serious. On the flip side I have girls that as soon as we had sex they introduced me to their parents as their boyfriend.

    It varies but in general if you are communicating on a regular basis and going on dates regularly it's pretty safe to assume you've achieved boyfriend/girlfriend status.

  • if he's proud enough to say you're his girl that should be enough

  • usually when I know I want to be with a girl and make it exclusive ect. I playfully change the topic like I would say "your stuck with me" or "all the other boys are gonna be jealous" by then the girl would ask why and I would say because I want you to be my girlfriend or something along those I think my craftiest way of doing it so far was when my ask ask what I was thinking about, I responded by trying to think of the best way to ask you to be my girlfriend...

    anyway to answer your question usually you know you are there before you have the "talk"...keep in mind that this only suits couples who are both serious..but when you are there the asking the question comes easy.

    hope this helped and best wishes

    • But in 4 weeks? you don't think that's too early to say? Do we need to get to know each other more longer? Or it doesn't matter?

    • Not at all, there is no set time limit...i ask a girl after about 10 days and we almost got married so time isn't a issue, if you truly feel like you want to be with this person then take the plunge and risk a little on love...yeah I know its corny lol but its true, you can never go wrong when you follow your heart

  • It's always sort of confusing thing to determine when you're "officially" boyfriend and girlfriend. Generally, the guy asks, but sometimes guys won't. Sometimes they won't ask because they're just as confused and don't want to come across as needy. From what you're telling me though, it sounds like that he is interested in having you as a girlfriend. I've had girls just ask me before whether we were boyfriend and girlfriend, so maybe you can just ask him? You are, after all, having sex with him. That's pretty serious... I don't think he's going to say no.

  • yup you're together he said your his girl that's about all I can help with

  • Alright so people have provided a lot of good advice already, so this is sort of a light hearted answer.

    Have you thought about Facebook? I'm actually being semi-serious. I'm in college and besides the obvious joke relationship statuses, I have seen whole relationships made and broken on it. There's a saying around my campus, "It's not official till its on FB." Even if you don't take FB relationships completely seriously, this is a simple easy way to test the waters at least. And if you do take FB seriously, then all the more power to this answer.

  • I'm guy and I've been threw many relationships now this is what you have to do go bowling or to a scary movie and if you show ur scared he'll hug and cuddle with you and say everyhing is all rite or take him bowling and when you do take some of ur girlfriends and see if he pays of attention to you if not then it's done if he pays more attention to your girl friends then he doesn't like you for shoe


What Girls Said 8

  • Just ask him. Are you his girlfriend? It may sound silly but that's exactly what you want to know so just come out with it. It sounds like he sees you as his girlfriend anyway :)

  • sometimes you just have to put it on the table and say what you want. some guys aren't all good and are willing to eventually call you girlfriend after a few dates and a few girls don't mind that. the key is to know what your standards are and lay them out black and white so that no guys can say it was nothing or it was only a few dates. the fact is, have a serious discussion with him early, set the standards to how you want to be treated. the definition then is all up to the girl to decide when and what she does determines her status as girlfriend. that's how you have control in this situation instead of letting guys decide all the time. just be careful about it and make it clear what you want.

  • "Cause I feel it is too early to say so.."

    "So are we getting serious?.."

    "Do we need to get to know each other more longer?.."

    Yet.. you're having sex with this guy "all the time"? Personal opinion here but, do you not think that by making the relationship sexual, you'll be giving him the impression that you're commiting to him, and that it IS infact serious?

    To be honest, you couldn't be any more together than you are now!

    Just ask him to clarify - it doesn't sound like he's gonna deny it..

  • Ok I used to be the same way. I got confused with a rebound relationship as well with a guy I used to date. I knew we were not together but he showed a lot of affection and I used to think we were... then I realized we aren't. lol My first REAL boyfriend though ASKED me and said, "So do you want to be my girlfriend?" as corny as it sounded and made me feel a bit uneasy. lol It really did make sense to ask that because then you would be confused whether you were and you might have just called him a friend even if he thought you guys were if it was never established. Just ask or let him say it. Make sure it's established though because you might think so but he might not think you guys are together and see other girls! Not cool in my book.

    • Well we been broke up now for almost 2 months so this is all water under the bridge. Thanks though.

  • This always seems to be a confusing subject, because to me as well, you can go on several dates with someone and not be their girlfriend. I would say if he's introducing you as "his girl" then he either assumes your his girlfriend, or certainly has interest in asking you to be his girl friend.

    I would assume though that if your having sex "all the time" then your getting serious. And there is no set time before you should be official, four weeks is more than long enough if your ready. If your not wanting to date him exclusively, I would make sure to tell him that your not looking for an exclusive relationship so he doesn't get confused.

    • But friends with benefits have sex all the time too so how do I know if he isn't just using me for sex? I always have that in the back of my mind.

    • The fact he introduced you as his girl is what really sticks out to me. If it was just a friends with benefits I would think that he wouldn't do that. If you guys hang out a lot and not do anything sexual, that's a good sign too

    • Yea last night I spent a night at his place and we didn't even have sex. We watched tv as I scratched his head then we went to sleep as we cuddles. So yeah I'm starting to think that I am his girlfriend now.

  • When a date is expected on Friday or Saturday, not asked, expected, you are together. Or when it has been talked about. Whichever comes first.

  • when in doubt ask.

    if you want to be a official couple

    ask him.

    say I have realize neither of us actually

    asked the other to become official so I was thinking I would.

    you don't have to be blunt

    and if you don't just live it up what happens happens

  • you ask him. lol

    • I kind of did and he said yes, I think. but by now I do feel like he is my man