Can't make him orgasm...

I really don't know what I'm doing wrong. When I go down on him, give him a hj, and even when I'm on top during sex, I get him so close to orgasming, but can never finish him. But when he's on top, he can! We've talked about it and he assures me I'm doing nothing wrong...but I feel like idk...The only way I can make him climax is if I sit there and take it...advice?

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • This may not be such a bad thing. I love girl on top its such a turn on to se my girl riding me grinding on me and getting off. I never come from girl on top I like to bend her over and do some doggy style to finish. But that's part of why I love girl on top most girls want their guy to last longer and most guys want to have sex more often, I like it to last longer too. When she's riding me I can just enjoy her tight p you s s y kiss her play with her boobs that are right in front of my face suck on her nipples. Most guys if they are any good in bed really try to hold thier come so it lasts longer and can try to give their girl an orgasm or at least a good time. I glance at the clock on the nightstand and try to make sure to slow down I want the time we spend inside each other to last. Unlike girls guys take time to recover. After orgasming we are no longer interested in sex for a while the older we get the longer the recovery time usually. SO maybe he doesn't want to be "finished" because he's enjoying himself. If you want to give him a blowjob to completion try focusing on the head of his penis. Licking around the bottom of the head, while also stroking with your hand. Play with his balls give them a gentle squeeze. I find a lot of girls are too slow and soft when trying to jack a guy off, the caution is appreciated but we move pretty quickly when we go at it. Maybe have him stroke himself a little bit while you watch so you can learn what he likes. Overall I wouldn't worry this is a problem a lot of couples wish they had. It sounds like you two are younger. Most women complain younger guys are so eager but they only last like two minutes or not even long enough to get her clothes off

What Guys Said 9

  • Sounds like he's developed a natural ability to withstand cumming from certain positions. I'd suggest trying new positions, or just having sex in a sequence of events that lead him to finishing on top.

  • Well, it may be about the position. He may not be comfortable in that position or may be he just wants not to reach climax so that you can keep going.

  • The next time you get on top slap him and spit on him.Call him a deformed freak and tell him if he doesn't come you're going to tell his family he's gay.I'm just kidding, lol. Relax there is nothing wrong with you I used to be this way and one day years later I started orgasming from positions and acts that didn't work before.What did I do different? Absolutely nothing, it just happened.So, instead of worrying about what is wrong, just relax and enjoy each other.Have fun, play, try variations and different things, do these things with no expectations except to have fun and don't worry.You are going to stress the fun out of sex.You have a boyfriend with an erection that won't go down. Take full advantage of it. Wear it out.

  • A guys point ove view when I am with a girl I don't like them on top I don't like it when she is looking at me I feel kind of enbaresed I o sounds daft but that makes me not come but if I do here from behind its no problem I just can't look at there face I don't no way but maybe he is the same

  • Alright - I had the same problem and we thought it had to be with being the dominant one and I was more arousing than the other way. It seems I never came unless we did 1 of two styles - for all the positions out their. But it's very enjoyable to caress her, kiss, lick, etc. and she can enjoy herself much longer than if the guy just pops :\ I hope this helps

  • there are a lot of different positions that can make an orgasm occur quicker or shorter. do some research on these positions and sex should be great.

  • link Enjoy and learnnn :]

  • He can make himself climax faster, because he knows his body better then you, just as I'm sure you can climax faster when you are on top.This is nothing to worry about, it's completely normal. Eventually you will get in tune with him, as I'm sure he will with you.

  • don't worry about it, when ur on top a guy won't climax as easy its just because the muscles are relaxed and when you are taking it he's going nuts on ya and it feels the best, maybe try give him head, or take it in the ass he will come for that

    • I do give him head but he only gets really close. He says he's worried about the taste for me....could this effect it?

    • I like to finish my self when I get head, just cause I know how to do it the best if you get him there you did good

What Girls Said 5

  • There's nothing wrong with you! Maybe something wrong with him.

  • Oh don't look at it that way at all! You are doing nothing wrong. It's just the way the penis is made. It may be really gross to compare a penis to a baby but this is the best comparison I can come up with. Have you ever seen a baby swaddled? It's when the mother wraps the blanket around the baby so tight that the baby can't move. Its really weird to watch. The baby can be wrapped in a blanket loosely and he will kick and scream. The minute she wraps that blanket around him, so it's almost like a straight jacket, the baby calms down and starts to sleep. The penis is the same way. The penis likes really tight, confined spaces. Looser ones may feel good but the nerve ends in the penis respond very well to a tight pressure. You can actually see that if you see a guy masturbate. It is shocking cause it looks like he is almost going to rip his penis off because he is handling it so roughly and he has such a firm grip on it. So how this effects you, the tighter something is around his penis, the better chance he has to orgasm. That's why missionary works so well. In that position your vaginal muscles are tight and they grip around the penis. In positions like girl on top your muscles aren't tight. It's almost more like a brushing of the muscles against his penis, like think of one of those sea anemones that just flow in the water. Its a rhythmic brushing against his penis. It feels good. But the penis isn't getting the tightness it loves. And as great as oral is the mouth was not made to be tight. Even if your lips are tight, your cheeks can't get close enough to give him that tightness. Hand jobs can do it, but like I said, you got to hold tighter than you would expect to. You can try to give tighter handjobs and when you give a blowjob, use your hand also. Wrap it around the part that isn't covered by your mouth and stroke it with a firm grip. For girl on top, you might just want to switch positions at the very end to missionary so he can have his orgasm. I could say you could try Kegel exercises to tighten your vagina but I don't think that's the issue since he isn't orgasming during oral or handjobs either. You can try positions that bring your legs together. The closer your legs are together, the tighter your vagina. Just remember, just like girl on top or doggie style feels better to you, certain positions feel better to him. And that's no ones fault.

  • lay him on his back and sit on him facing forward. a little awkward for you but you should hit the right spots he needs ;)

  • Keep trying on top. Sometimes it feels better for the woman, but it is harder for men to finish. Have him lift his hips and grind into you. Speed may be another issue. Notice men tend to "jackrabbit" before orgasm. He may need a bit of that to finish it off.Best of luck!

  • ask him what he wants and do it

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