Why do guys say they want to still be friends when they don't?

Why do guys say they want to be friends and keep in touch when they aren't planning to do either? Why is that? After my break up with my ex he said what can be friends and to keep in touch, but I have been doing that but he doesn't say anything back to me...why is that?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Guys and girls do this. Part of it is that we all have good and bad elements to our personalities. Sometimes people put up with us when they are getting something out of it, but once that reward is gone (and it could definitely be the physical side) then we see that the balance isn't there and move on. If I found a girl somewhat annoying but was enjoying the physical fun then I would put up with it. But once that was gone I'd be left with the annoying personality and think that it wasn't worth my time. Not saying that's you, but in general break-ups can happen when people are tired of each other's crap, so why keep on dealing with it?

    Also some people like to cut off contact altogether so that old feelings aren't stirred up. If you really like someone but can't have her, what's good about being in touch with her? Hope can be a terrible thing and so it's better to walk away.


What Guys Said 3

  • I hate to point out the obvious for most of us guys, but the majority of guys want to be friends and keep in touch, but only if the occasional benefits are involved.

    I can't speak for your situation, but as a general rule, ex guys do not make good friends.

  • The same thing happens with the opposite sexes.


What Girls Said 3

  • He probably is trying to give you a little space first. It can be hard for guys to know how to act in situations they may see as awkward so sometimes they try to completely avoid the issues. He also may think that you are trying to start the relationship up again

    • You could be right about the space..but as far as him thinking I want to start the reltionship up again..I never said anything for him to think I wanted the relationship to start back up...I usually asked how he was, how his music is coming along...

    • He probably got the hint you want to you wanted it to start back up again. A lot of boys play to stupid to facts they already know are true about us.

  • That's because some guys think it's an easy let down. Others, prefer not to be friends with their exes and then you have the people that just involve themselves in different things to keep busy so they don't have to deal with or think about the breakup

  • If he doesn't want to talk then give him his space for a while, maybe something came up that was personal or something. Or he still might be uncomfortable after the break up, especially if he has a new girlfriend. She might be uptight and keep commanding him not to talk to other girls (which is kinda retarded). Keep in mind that he still may be thinking about you even if he hasn't kept in contact as much.

    • Yeah but he is writing other people and mutual friends that we know but ignoring me.

    • Show All
    • Lol thanks!

    • No problem. You deserve it. Its his loss.