Do "friends with benefits" relationships always end badly?
Theres a guy that I have hooked up with many times for 2 years or more. I used to have really strong feelings for him but over time and as I've matured and realized that I would never want to actually be with him, those feelings have gone away. Yesterday we met up for the first time in a couple months and hooked up..and today I have just been thinking a lot about it and if its a good idea. I think I want to end all contact with him and just take him out of my life but I'm not sure what to do. Sometimes I just feel like I would rather have him in my life like this, than not have him in it at all. Which sounds really stupid...Any suggestions?
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I don't know if they _always_ end badly, but in my experience they tend to end badly. I don't think you sound stupid by wanting him as an FWB, if it's the only option. But I also don't think it's healthy or reasonable of you to do FWB. It'll be difficult, if not impossible, for you to separate your emotions. People get emotionally attached to their sexual partners -- especially women do this. I suggest you do no contact for a fixed period -- three months, perhaps. This might be a good compromise. 3 months to get level-headed and clear your mind and clear your heart. After 3 months, you can re-evaluate what you want from him, and from each other. Good luck!
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I don't know if they always end badly.. but I have read on a dating site, and been told by my guy friends before.. that most people don't know.. but whatever a guy sees you as.. or meets you as.. either "my girlfriend" or "a friend I have sex with" or a "hot fling" or "the love of my life" is usually what he will always think of you as.. there are exceptions etc. but it seems to be pretty accurate.
Um that actually doesn't sound stupid just because sometimes I think just like that when it comes to my ex. I love him, but sometimes I can't deal with him but I don't want him out of my life, so I'm keeping him in my life and continuing to hangout and be intimate with him, just because that's the best decision for me and I'm okay with it. So if you want to keep him in ur life and still be intimate with him, then go for it :) its nothing wrong with it. You do whatever you want to do :)