How can I tell my husband that I don't want to do a threesome with another women?

my husband and I have been married for a year now..he keeps asking me to do a 3some I have told him no a number of times..he then gets mad and asks me why I won't do it..i think its nasty..i get very upset when he mentions it and I feel really sh*tty..and I ask myself why am I not enough..why is this 3some so important to him?i want to explain to him why I'm not into it..but every time I try he gets upset with me..he says he only wants to do it to keep our sex life enjoyable...what the heck...am I not good enough?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • you just him straight out that you expect him to be faithful and that a 3some won´t happen because it´s not naturla to do or want that or to even think about requesting it from your partner especially your wife,

    So don´t let one thing happen: do not under any circumstances let him make you feel guilty because you hesitate and don´t want a 3some.

    communication is everything talk about it but till him right away ( if you don´t want it) that there´s NO way a 3some going to happen with yourself involved.

    If he truly loves you he will never talk about it and after a while maybe forget about it.

    if not you should draw your own conclusions but form my point of view a threesome is neither natural nor progressive or some of that bs even if everybody is so so liberal these days.

    don´t get me wrong i´m not a religious fanatic or a prude but that´s jus how I see it and I would never even ask my girlfriend for sth like that.

    just stay strong Confidence is something you build with ur actions.No one can give it 2 you or sell it 2 u. Your confidence must come from you.

    so do what´s right only 4 YOU. ( in this matter)

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What Guys Said 26

  • A 3-some is one of the most frequent sexual fantasies of all men.

    Just say "No, I don't want that" Or "Yes, with another guy!"

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  • Any reason why "I don't want to have a threesome with another woman" won't work?

    And maybe I'm old-fashioned, but minor details--like the number of naked people in the bed--are the sort of thing one sorts out during the engagement, I would think.

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  • Whoa woah whoa... you've been married a year and he thinks you need a threesome to keep your sex life enjoyable?! That's just crazy. I don't think the problem is you. The problem is he has this fantasy in his head and he's at the point where he's obsessed with it. It's clear you don't want to do this and it's clear that he doesn't care enough about you to respect your feelings. I would suggest you seek some professional counseling so you two can work through whatever issue he has.

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  • Just say no ur not going to do it. It doesn't mean ur not good enough it is just a fantasy. Lets face it men like women and how can you expect men to find all other women ugly just because he's with you. If you wanted to do it that would be cool, if you don't don't he shouldn't pressure you about it just say no without anger or questions

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  • Wanacot pretty much said it as is. If I were to type out an answer it would basically be a rewording of what he said with more swear words thrown in and insults towards your husband and questions on why you're wasting your time with him.

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What Girls Said 20

  • Your question was written a long time ago! What ever was the outcome of this? Is he over asking you? Have you seperated? Did you finally give in and do another girl for him?

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  • It's nothing to do with you really. I know it must feel like it but some guys just have this fantasy and really want to experience it. You can also think of it in terms of him wanting to include you is a compliment. He could go behind you back but he wants you to be a part of it. Ask how he would feel if the third person was another man, would he feel comfortable if you did that. Just tell him exactly why you don't like the idea of him being with another woman and if he understands then he will just have to sacrifice it because some women just don't want to see their man with any other woman. I do agree with you though, I wouldn't want a threesome either!

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  • well we all know that he shouldn't be asking you to do this but if I was in your shoes id say okay id do it in one condition, If we have a threesome with another man with us.. and he has to do everything I want to him.. BELIEVE ME he will forget about it.

    plus tell him I wouldn't want to share you with someone so why would you wanna share me with someone?

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  • You shouldn't have to do one. I can totally understand, I would never do one myself. If you are married to one person, that should be the only person you're having sex with. He's getting upset because you don't want him to have sex with another woman, basically.

    It's just consented cheating, to me. Tell him to drop it or this won't work, seriously.

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  • If you've told him No several times, you have a problem with him that goes way beyond sex. He needs to respect your decision Period.

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