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Can you become sexually attracted to someone whom you're not at first?

I am dating a guy who has everything I have always wanted in a man and more! He's great looking, sense of humor, great physique, ambitious, good values, comes from a good family, (drives a BMW x5!):) . etc etc. We get on exceptionally well, BUT. I am not sexually attracted to him. The thought of him touching me completely repulses me. I don't know if this will develop in time, or whether attraction is something that's either there or its not?

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • Sometimes a great friendship will overcome the sexual barrier. Though, when the word "repulse" gets thrown out there.I would question whether a friendship has ever really overcome that. Especially if you are constantly noticing exactly how sick this guy makes you. I'm confused though. Why exactly does a guy that is great looking, very well off, have great values, ambitious, great body.etc, etc, etc.repulse you. My suggestion is this Ashlea. Climb in your car. Drive down to the closest truck stop you can find. Lock the doors.trust me.Lock the doors. And just watch all the prime cuts of beef that walk in and out of the doors there for and hour or two. I have a feeling that the next time you see this man of yours.you won't be able to get him naked fast enough. Good luck.

    • Ha ha ha ha thanks:):) I know what you're saying.... and strangely enough, I AM attracted to those 'types':) I have more sexual tension with my mechanic who's 6 years younger than me with NO car. .... Mmmm perhaps I need to do some self-growth.I find him repulsive because he totally INTO me, and will do ANYTHING for me.... and treats me like a princess and I am just not used to it. I am used to doing the chasing and 'looking after' delinquents:) I guess its the unfamiliar!

What Guys Said 2

  • I'd say it's either there or it's not! However, it does seem like money attracts you more than anything else since the way you described your guy as being a very desirable man that most women would want in all successful kind of ways. Other than all the good things you said about him, there must be something about him that you DON'T LIKE! If you can't stand the thought of him even touching you, how did he ever become your man and how desirable are you to him do you think?

    • Perhaps you misread me:) In fact, money is not important to me because I'm a doctor with my own practice, and lets face it, I have enough. The qualities such as loyal, kind, faithful, ambitious and humorous are what is important to me.I guess the fact that he is almost 'too good to be true' is what's turning me off! And the fact that he is 'too keen'.... He's already asking me if I will move cities to be with him??!!!

  • Feel free to try someone else and see if chemistry works, and if so it is not wise to commit to the guy you are dating right now, however attractive he is in other aspects.

What Girls Said 4

  • Honey lets face it, you are there for the good life only and the answer is NO as far as you ever wanting to sleep with him! I am sure that at some point he is going to dump you unless he is just keeping you around for eye candy and he is getting his ass somewhere else! Bet he is not so repulsive as you are climbing into that BMW

    • Very true in a few ways:).... I guess I keep hoping I'll fall for him because he is so good for me and is the 'ideal' man in many ways, and I have such a history for dating the 'bad boy' jerks with no ambition. I'm used to being the bread winner and the 'successful' one.

  • Actually, it has happened to me on more than one occasion where I will be with a guy and not be sexually attracted to him. Then he will touch me and after a few days, I will be addicted to him. So, I suppose it's possible!

  • I didn't realize I was sexually attracted a guy till I had seen his body in all its glory. But if there is no sexual tension between you two, sex might be a bit boring, unless you really connect on an emotional level

  • I suggest just give it a little bit of time, I once dated a guy a 13 years older than myself, he was a great guy, owned a house, 2 cars, took me on trips, bought me nice things, he was great! But it wasn't there.just wasn't. After him I met my husband and at first was more intimidated by him then attracted to him. He's a big guy, I had never really been with a guy with extra weight before. But I waited it out for a couple months and in my eyes he's the most attractive man I've ever seen. All 315 pounds of him, I notice now I only look at big men, if a guy has a 6 pack or weights less than 200 pounds I don't even notice him. Completly changed what I find attractive. So like I suggested give it time-not forever. I don't know how long you've been seeing him but I'd say maybe 3 months, in that time you'll know. If he will grow on you or if you need to just cut your ties with him.

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