Are there any girls on this site who want to or did stay virgins until marriage?

i guess guys can stay virgins until marriage too, but I've never met one in real life who wanted to.

living in a highly sexualized society where hooking up is the norm, keeping a purity promise to yourself is difficult. when I was with my boyfriends I wanted to give in to my urges sometimes, but I knew I had to stay strong. remaining pure is the right decision for me.

are there any other girls who feel this way? how do you stay strong and deal with guys who try to make you break your promise?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Hi luv. Yes I want to stay as a virgin until marriage. And yes, I feel the same way as you do because my boyfriend have had sex with his exes before, and I told him that I don't wanna have sex before marriage. I love him a lot and sometimes, I really just wanna give in, not because he forced me into it, but I felt a strong connection between us.

    A few ways that helped me is when I'm in a situation by which I'm feeling so, I kept reminding myself the reasons why I don't want to have sex; the thought that once I've done it, there's no turning back; and if I'm not ready, don't do it, because I do not want to involve others in the aftermath of having sex should things go wrong. And I genuinely hold on to this believe (based on observation) that if a guy really respects you decision, we won't push you into it. He may have the urge, but once you say no, and explain that you don't want anyone, including yourself to be involved with complicated matters should things go wrong due to having sex together, he'll stop. Anything further is a nono and by any means is not the right guy.

    Stay focused, just like how you stay focused in playing sports. Hope this helps! x


What Guys Said 20

  • Um, well there are some of us guys who are virgins too, but we just tend to sit back and wait for Gods timing in things, don't worry about it, we do exist and are so excited to see Gods hand and timing go to work. He has a plan "for those who wait", sorry had to throw a shout out to one of my favorite christian music groups, Fireflight, lol.

    -Humble Christian Guy 20

    • Fireflight is pretty sweet... I like their song "You Gave Me A Promise" or whatever it's called lol.

    • World needs more guys like you. Just saying. [:

  • I was not a virgin and had been with 2 girls when I met a girl that was a virgin and wanted to wait. I'm not a man whore and I really liked her so I decided to be with her and not have sex anymore til she was ready. Her values became "our" values and we waited for 3 years. She was lying to me and seeing some rich guy behind my back while we were in a very serious relationship (engaged). I didn't have anything at the time and her family was all for her being with a wealthy guy. Either way that was not acceptable and I broke it off with her.

    My situation sucked but I said all that to say this: It can be done and if you really love somebody it isn't a chore at all. Sure it has it's physicall you learn and grow through something like that. And I learned that I can and will completely refrain from sex if someone special comes along. I also learned that if I had it to do over, I would have waited myself also. I LOVE sex but knowing I had it in me to wait, I kinda wish I would have. Anyone can do it. You just have to ignore the "highly sexualized society where hooking up is the norm" as you mentioned...and embrace your own values and be proud of them.

  • well. I'm still a virgin, and 28.. not sure if I'm waiting fro marriage, more the right moment in time, that spark where things feel right and I know I won't have regret. I want know she's the one or at least could be. ( hehe and currently in a relationship for a year and half now) so I know it is hard for her to wait for me, but know our love is true too. ( as for make you break your promise, he cant, not if you are strong enough, and not if he loves youe enough.. if he knew how much you want this ideal, then he be the one supporting you.)

  • Pardon my offtopic, but staying "clean" until marriage means absolutely no sex or just normal intercourse?

    • No sex of any kind, meaning oral, vaginal, etc.

    • No sex of any kind, meaning oral, vaginal, etc. I've never done more than kiss a guy.

  • Yeah I'm a virgin guy waiting until marriage as well... I don't find the thought of casual hook-ups appealing at all!

    • with you man. even if I were to give it away before, It would be with some one special.

    • Yeah same but I'm just gonna wait no matter what. Dude, I couldn't even kiss a girl that I wasn't diggin' a lot... lol I just don't get how a lot of people can be so intimate with random people the way they are.

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What Girls Said 30

  • I am like you saving myself, but much older. While it is hard, you can do it--just rely on yourself and your on will. It's not about being picky with who you share yourself with (though this could be a reason), it is about staying true to your own vow and your own sense of self. Do not let others dissuade you from this path by mockery or something else, remember who you are and rely on your strong soul and will to maintain your stance.

  • Please don't feel as though I'm trying to pressure you, but there are so many benefits and reasons TO have sex before marriage! You're denying yourself of a basic right, not to mention a right that feels wonderful and incredible. May I ask what you believe you're gaining by waiting? There is nothing impure about sex, it's not bad for you and doing it outside of marriage isn't something that should be looked down upon. It's understandable if you want to wait until you know some one better, yes, but to wait until marriage? How can you honestly say you want to spend the rest of your life with a person who you don't even know your compatible with at one of the most fundamental and important aspects of a relationship? You might think sex is just sex, but that's not the case and unfortunately you won't know it until you try it. And to commit to some one who you could end up having a lackluster love life with will end up being the dagger to the heart. Why gamble on your marriage? Wouldn't you rather be sure the guy is the one who you not only want to, but can spend the rest of your life with? You might think sex isn't that big of a deal now, but that's being naive. I'm not saying you have to give it away to every guy you meet, but I sure hope you will be able to feel comfortable enough to express yourself physicaly before marriage rather than taking a blind gamble!

  • i want to stay a virgin till I find the right guy and ready for iot 100% completely


    Yeah, I`m a virgin too.

  • A lot of people think like that. I think staying true to yourself is all about trusting your values and the person you're with, though having a sympathetic ear never hurts.

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