Why does husband all of a sudden want to have sex with me?

My husband and I might as well been seperated since March of 2011. I can honestly count on both hands how many times we have had sex since then. He was "never in the mood" but yet he would wake up with a bonner every morning. Or he had some excuse why he didn't want to. It literally was too the point where I was asking him to do it every night. And everynight he would turn me down. He moved in with his dad. Was there 2 days. Came home and all the sudden I look at him and he is hard as a rock. So of coarse I asked him if he wanted to have sex. And to my surprise he said yes! When we were doing it he was acting very strange. Also he did not come right away. After not having sex for 3 months prior you would think it would be a quicky. And when he ejaculated it was as if he didn't come at all. (usually he comes alot).

*Why did he all the sudden want to have sex with me after so many months of turning me down?

*Since he didn't come fast and it wasn't a lot does that mean he cheated?

*Why would he turn me down in the first place?

 

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • A) your relationship is probably failing for some reason that needs to be talked about and I doubt it has to do with sex. Maybe he thinks you did something, but hasn't confronted you. Maybe he lost respect for you, maybe you've just gotten distant. But, when you stop having sex, its usually coming towards the end. At least when you're under 30 :)

    B) Just because he didn't come a lot does not mean he cheated. Guys masterbate. A LOT! Especailly if he isn't having sex with you!

    C) See A

    On an aside, guys can wake up with boners all the time and it has nothing to do with their level of horniness. Although I rarely turn down morning sex.

    • There isn't much you can do at all. All relationships require both parties to engage in calm adult conversation when problems arise. Just do your part, let him know you love him, stay calm, talk softly, and try not to point fingers. If it still fails, at least you did your part.

    • Ive asked him before if he masterbates and he gets relle defensive and says no. He has absolutley NO COMUNICATION skills! Its like he won't talk to me about anything. He turns everything into a fight.

      *What can I do to change this and make things better?

What Guys Said 1

  • He is not into you at all anymore. End things now.

    • Lust burns out and then some people realize that there is no love to back up the loss of lust

    • How does that happen? I could see if we were just dating, but we are married.

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