any explanation would help me. I can handle tough love. please.
been dating over a month but not exclusive. he texts and or calls daily. but for the past few days he's been more distant. still contacts me but not as much every day, like fewer texts back and forth.
he thinks I'm a bit of a tease. he wants to have sex, so do I but it isn't like he's invited me over, and I don't have my own place. plus I guess I'm slightly hesitant because we aren't exclusive.
and we still see each other and after our last date he told me he had fun with me and was sweet.
im not good at expressing my emotions and with him I'm a little scared to because he doesn't, plus he may not be so serious about me so I'm scared to seem too intense and push him away.
he always asks if I missed him and said one time that I never take initiative at contacting him and that I "play tough" with him.
is he just out for sex and mad that I didn't give it up and does this mean I might lose him? if we had a real place to go I'd do it. I accept that we may never be committed anyway, I just want him so much.
could he just be busy? even if he's seeing others, that's his business?
or does he just feel confident that he "has me" since it's been a while now?
or does he think I don't care enough?
Most Helpful Guy
While sex is definitely not the ONLY thing a guy wants out of a relationship, it IS one of the important things. If you take out sex, why be in a relationship at all, because it is no different from just being friends.
Your guy doesn't mind waiting a little while in order for you to be comfortable and trust him, but if you are teasing him and then not following through, he's going to get frustrated and angry, because you aren't appreciating his patience. And if he gets frustrated and angry, he's going to disengage from you and start looking elsewhere.
You two need to start communicating a lot better and be open and honest with each other about what you really want out of the relationship, and you must STOP PLAYING GAMES. Tell the truth, and get the truth from him, and then, if you can't come to an agreement, then go your separate ways. At least then, you'd be doing it for the right reasons.
And if you want to stay with him, realize that sex is an important part of adult relationships and it's' going to be expected in any long-term relationship. If you need him to be exclusive with you (a VERY reasonable requirement), then ask him to make it official.
The bottom line is that it is OKAY for you to ask for what you want, and it's okay for him to ask for what he wants. To NOT ask because "you're afraid to lose him" is one of the best ways TO lose him.0