Would it be OK if your girlfriend slept in the same bed and was naked in front of her gay best friend?

Would it be OK if they had sleepovers, she gets dressed in front of him, they kiss goodbye on the lips and he's undoubtedly gay?

Girls, same question but if it was your boyfriend and his lesbian best friend?

I figured that it would be different for the man and lesbian because it seems more wrong than the other scenario with a gay man. Probably because there's no guarantee that there's no interest on the boyfriends part towards the lesbian friend while its unlikely that the woman would be at all interested in her gay male friend, its an interesting dynamic.


Most Helpful Girl

  • No. Whether the other person is interested or not, due to their sexual preference, that has no bearing on whether or not MY partner is interested in them. And regardless, that behavior is inappropriate to engage in with someone other than your partner while in a relationship, unless both partners have agreed to have an open sexual relationship with others. In my relationship, that's not okay. That would be HIM disrespecting me, and his lesbian friend disrespecting me by allowing or encouraging it. She likes women, so there should be no reason for her to allow such a thing, unless she isn't really a lesbian, and/or she has no disregard for the woman he's with, which is not a friend. A friend doesn't have to like the people in his life, but they do need to show respect for those people BECAUSE of their friendship, especially when it's their friend's partner, they need to respect the relationship. It's inappropriate, end of story, lol, and I wouldn't engage in that kind of behavior with any other man while I'm with my boyfriend, even if that man was gay, because I'd feel like I was crossing a line. So if my guy did that, we would have issues.


What Guys Said 10

  • Uh...no reason for all that. It is perverted. Besides there is the whole mixed up idea of bisexuality. I don't see any consistency in any of it. If it seems suspicious...it probably doesn't need to be happening.

    Other cliché' terms: "you don't go to a barber shop and not want a haircut," "playing with fire...and not expecting to get burned."

    Something is wrong either way, I would have a new girlfriend shortly after. That is disrespectful and foolish to remain a part of. Hope this helps.

  • If he was "undoubtedly gay," I'd be OK with her doing it, as long as (a) it wasn't a regular occurrence, (b) neither of them is naked, and (c) they HUG goodbye, not kiss.

    But I think I'd have trouble being assured he wouldn't do anything.

    What if he thinks he's gay, but when he sees a hot girl naked in his bed, he suddenly wants to find out if he's BI? lol

    • lol my boyfriend wouldn't go for that either, he said the guy is probably just pretending to be gay

    • Very likely! :D

  • im OK with dressing in front of them but not a kiss on the lips for bye

    • yea I agree that's crossing the line, but is it because your worried about where his lips have been or because its like cheating

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    • well that part will still be in my mind even if you tell me the guy is disgusted by women and all those things

    • thats understandable

  • What a stupid question, even make me mad when I read it, how you can ask such a question like this? Are you f***ing slut for sure you are.

    • lol instead of trying to insult me and failing, you could just answer the question or at least explain why the question upsets you and why you think asking a hypothetical question like this on the internet makes me a slut.

    • If you ask that, that mean you're totally cool with doing that with your gay friend, it's slutty.

    • No I'm not OK with that. And I don't have any gay friends. It was a hypothetical question that came to my mind after watching a movie. I find it quite silly that you would jump to that conclusion.

  • no I wouldn't like that

  • No. Kiss on the lips? ya no. No need to be naked around each other either.

  • You know what I bet has NEVER happened EVER? A girl and her gay bff, getting drunk one night and him f*cking the bejesus out of her. Nope. No way that's ever, ever, EVER happened before. And I'm sure no girl has EVER sucked the c0ck of a gay guy before.

    Short answer: No. Absolutely not. Not cool for her to be in bed with another guy. Not cool for her to be naked in front of another guy.

    • I agree that its not OK for her to be naked in front of another guy but getting drunk doesn't usually change peoples sexual orientation. That's like saying its possible for you to get so drunk that you could have sex with a man.

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    • Again, that's all well and good, but if my girl gets naked in front of one or sleeps with one, she's out.

    • totally understandable

  • No that would be too weird and besides why isn't she in my bed with me? No I would not be cool with it.

  • I don't mind them sleeping in the same bed. No copping a feel no matter if it was a male or female friend, gay or straight. I wouldn't be down with them kissing on the lips either, and again, that is for any friends and not just gay guy friends. I don't think it would bother me if she was naked around them as long as it was just with her best friends and not just showing everybody.

  • sure, he's gay but no if he's bi


What Girls Said 5

  • Uhhhhh no. Not allowed.

  • you have to wonder what he is getting out of this sort of realtionship (that's he's not getting with his girlfriend)...? What is the women (lesbian friend) getting out of this aswell? Maybe consider having an open realtionship with the bf.. or none at all, just be friends.

  • That's inappropriate in either situations

    I wouldn't be comfortable doing that because I would be disrespecting my boyfriend and I wouldn't want him doing that.

    But I guess our society has become so involved in walking on eggshells around the whole gay topic that I probably share an uncommon view

    • For people that are OK with it, it seems like its not about crossing the boundaries of the relationship its about ego and feeling threatened.

  • F*** no! No one is going to see my boyfriend naked except me. I don't care if she's a lesbian or not. Sleepovers and kissing is not okay either. That would be so disrespectful to the persons significant other. Gay or not, it doesn't matter, it's still someone of the opposite gender and that's just not right.

    • thats true

    • "it's still someone of the opposite gender and that's just not right." So you would be okay if your boyfriend slept naked with a gay guy because he was the same gender?

    • No but what does that have to do with anything? That's completely irrelevant. She asked if itvwould be okay for him to sleep with a lesbian, I said no.