Why doesn't my boyfriend want to have sex with me?

My now boyfriend of three months doesn't ever want to have sex with me.Before we got together we we were sleeping together for over a year,just sleeping together and hanging out a little bit.I've loved him for a while now and I wanted us to be more.So when I finally got him to make a commitment to me,he moved in with me and we've been together for three months now.But the sex has stopped.What's up?

Updates:
I've talked to him, he says he most definitely loves me and wants to be with me.He also swears he loves having sex with me but it's been weeks since I told him how I felt and still we've only had sex twice in the past month!I'm tired of being turned down!
What do I do? I don't know if I can be with someone that doesn't ever want to have sex with me? Is that wrong?
 

What's Your Opinion?

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Most Helpful Opinion

  • Subconscious resentment, a feeling of being trapped. Did you get the impression he was not happy with you? You were "sleeping together for over a year and hanging out some" did you feel he was not happy during that year?"when I finally got him to make a commitment to me" that sounds like you made him do this rather than he wanted to make this commitment, and from what you say I think I am correct with that assumption. He had a female friend and a good sex life. He was probably pretty satisfied with things as they were. Now he is has been somehow coerced into more and is likely rebelling against it and concerned about what other plans you may be making for him.

What Guys Said 3

  • What it sounds like to me, from a guys perspective, is that he's not being turned on by you. Try spicing up things in the relationship by wearing lingerie, or being more physical when asking for sex. Truth is, every guy wants sex, it just depends on who its from. If you can turn him on, it will happen. Another reason why he could be acting this way is because he might have a fear of committment and when you were having sex with him before you got together, you were just another girl. To me this is a very unique situation, guys aren't usually prude. Just take your time, be more suggestive and physical, and make yourself look sexy to catch his eye. Maybe change your hairstyle or clothes to catch his attention,Good Luck

  • Something has led him to believe this is a waste of time. Either (A) You've gotten uglier (B) He's found something/someone better (chess? a hotter gf?) or (C) Sexing is you is now routine and boringYou can fix (C) by making him work for it or dressing up as a TV or movie character you know he likes, when my girlfriend dressed up as Captain Falcon sh*t was so cash.

  • Tension at his job, stress levels, lack of spontaneity. Try being more physical with him throughout the day, touching him more often and being a bit more sensual. Offer to massage him. Wear sexier clothing around the house. Shave your legs at odd times so that he can see them. Try some of this stuff.

What Girls Said 3

  • That f***ing suck.

  • Sex is definitely an important part of a healthy relatioship. I was just curious about the way you worded your question... "So when I finally got him to make a commitment to me". that part worries me a bit when you say you got him to commit to you. Are you sure he wants to be commited? And in my experience there is definitely somthing up when a man doesn't want sex, are you sure he is being faithful?

  • Have you ever heard guys say..."Before I married her we had sex all the time now we don't even touch each other" well the tables are turned. Once a guy is comfortable he feels like he doesn't have to win you over anymore with his sex skills, if you are living together, he understands this is a commitment that shouldn't solely be about sex. Just like the do us sometimes...you have to tell him you want it. Tell him you miss those times. He will come around. But he also might get upset and feel like that is the only reason you are with him..Guys are sensitive too. They just try not to show.Make sure there is no outside source affecting him also. Drugs, work, school, and other girls can all be a factor to a guys not wanting to have sex at home.Hope that helps hun! : )

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