Do I have a chance of getting him back?

My boyfriend and I broke up about one month ago. We were together for over two years...

First, it was a mutual decision, but as soon as I got home that day, I regret it all. I told him this, but he said that he did not think that we should be together, he just wants a friendship :/

I have talked to him further about this and why he does not want to be in a relationship with me. He said to me that he enjoys my company and misses me a lot, but he does not want to be in a relationship with me! The reason why is that he thinks that the same thing that we did when we broke up, might happen again (the reason why we broke up was because we ended up more and more like best friends instead of a couple. I can admit that I sometimes took him for granted and so on, which make me feel really bad!).

As you can understand, this makes me really depressed and I can't think of anything but him. However, I still think I might have a chance of winning him back, since he said that he misses me. But I don't know...

What should I do? I tried "No contact" but he ended up texting me and asking me basically how I am and what I've been up to lately. This made me think that he cared about me and all that, but my friends say that he just might feel bad and wanted to make sure I'm fine so that he could sleep at night.

He told me yesterday that he just wants to be my friend, but when I responded that I can't be friends with him (since I'm in love with him), he went "what? why? :(" and so on.

PLEASE help... we talked about hanging out this weekend, so I need to know what to do... I know I want to look my best and act like a real quality girlfriend material, so that I won't enter some sort of friendzone, but I need more detals in what to do and how to flirt with my ex!


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think that if you want a relationship with him, you cannot accept..."friendship". Sometimes it takes a person not having you around to realize that you are awesome sauce. If I were you, after the breakup, I would have straight up told him,"I'm going to need my space for right now. Maybe we can have friendship way down the road. But for right now, I would appreciate it if you would give me my space."

    When someone breaks up with you, thats them saying they don't want to work on things with you anymore. You running and answering his texts and hanging out with him is only feeding his need to know you're okay with the decision, and that he can now keep tabs on what YOU'RE doing as he slowly moves on to another person. If he DIDN'T feel like he wanted the relationship to end , he would have jumped at the opportunity to work on things when you told him you loved him.

    Right now, it seems like you want him more than he wants you...NOT good.

    I recommend backing wayyyyy off. Even disappearing for a bit. How can someone miss you or realize their feelings if you're always in their face?

    • Should I cancel our "plans" for the weekend? For hoe long do you think I should avoid him?

    • Show All
    • I can't tell you whether or not to cancel your plans.It doesn't sound like he magically wants to get back together with you (and you know thats what you really want), so to me...i dont see any point of meeting up unless you want to relive being hurt over and over again.

      I think girls think if they continue to put themselves in front of the guy, that he suddenly will change his Girls do this until their ex introduces her to his NEW girlfriend. And you can't be upset, or have the right to be upset, because after are just a FRIEND.

      Every guy but one that I have walked away from without a single tear, begging or pleading, ALL tried to come back later on. One guy even spent 4 YEARS looking for me! And thats because I walked away from him and didn't try to get him back. This doesn't happen ALL of the time, but I do know that guys respect the girl that KNOWS her worth and that KNOWS she can get another guy easily.

    • I'm basically referring to when guys broke up with me.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • You're done as a couple. You need to accept that and move on. If that means no contact, do it. Like Taylor swift said. You are never ever ever...

  • There is a possibility that you will have relationship with him. But time is needed. Maintain tge friendship and see what happens.. :)

    • I don't want to end up in the friendzone though.. :/

    • Show All
    • Yes, it does... But it's hard to be friend with someone that you love. The things is, that I don't really want to be friends, I want a relationship with him. Isn't friendship kinda hard to turn into love?

    • Yeah i know :(
      I have gone across it..and i understand how hard it is to be friends with one you love.
      Though i wasn't in relationship, i loved her and she was my hard crush. But when it didn't worked...I ignored her and broke all relations. Now i have moved on. But you know my dear, today i feel that why i broke friendship with her. It feels immature to do like that now. You suddenly start thinking" something is always better than nothing" :)
      # experience #
      Now we don't talk at all..i feel bad for that...i lost childhood friend :(
      That's why telling you, if you remain as friend, then at least remain in regular touch for your own sake.
      After all who knows when would life change it's coarse...

What Girls Said 1

  • It might not possible to get him back, when people break up, they do for a reason and those reasons will always be there if you dont fix them. By going out with him this weekend you are allowing your to be put in the friend zone and you said that's not where you want to be

    • But can't I do something on our "date" that might change the way he sees me? I am very surprised that he right away starts to see me as a friend considering the long time we were together :S

    • Youve been together already, and he knows you, he likes you, but he doesn't want to go through, whatever it was before