Why is my ex keeping me around after our break up?

Me and my ex broke up about a month ago. It was his choice because he has different plans for his future and he doesn't want to drag me into it (he could potentially have a career that is far away and doesn't want to drag me into it - his future really is unpredictable).

BUT we agreed to still be close and we still talk everyday and hang out (as friends) though it hasn't been as much lately. Though we originally agreed to give each other space. We both agreed that we wouldn't be into another relationship for a long time and he knows that I will cut him off if he lies to me because he said I did nothing wrong in our relationship. I won't cut him off if he does find that other relationship when he goes off to his career (if he does). He told me that it will take him awhile to get over me and he needs time to heal. He also told me that there's no way that he's leaving me or what we had behind and he is the person that he is today because of me.

So why is he keeping me around? To truly keep this friendship? Or to possibly reconcile our relationship one day, if possible? I know if I ended a relationship with somebody I didn't wish to possibly get back together with in the future, I wouldn't want to keep them around in my life.
We dated for 7 1/2 months but "talked" or whatever that is called 2 1/2 months prior to that. We rarely fought while we were dating. He told me there were no problems in our relationship.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Okay i can understand your X and his attitude.Actually it is a common problem happened to anyone and his attitude towards you.
    He like and he still loves you But he needs to sort himself out.Ambition is really hard to fight, There's something missing in your heart if you against the chance of reaching your dreams.

    But his actions are very clear that he realized that how important you are to him.
    if you want to get him back, just keep in touch if he approach but don't contact him, just be nice and help him and support him when he needs it.
    If you dont want to get him back, then you can try to move on, it means no contact, cut him completely.


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What Guys Said 1

  • As a guy that did something like this, i'll try and answer. Why i did it? It's not because i didn't love her. By the contrary, i really think i loved her too much. Just that i realized at that point i wasn't capable of having a relationship with all the things that were on my mind. Since i couldn't put them aside, i took the decision to try and solve them first then pursue the relationship with the girl. That's exactly why he is trying to keep you as a friend, because he thinks he could resume from were he left. Why he became a bit distant lately. He probably noticed you are willing to wait, so he calmed down a bit and rather take care of the things that haunt him.

    The difference in my story is, i told the girl even though we weren't together. I was picking up STRONG signs of interest. SO i thought it's better to confess and also tell her about my problems, that i couldn't commit to her 100% and i would want to give her EVERYTHING. I also told her that i would always love her and maybe sometime in the future we could make it work.
    She denied having feelings for me. We currently don't speak anymore. It hurt like hell to hear her deny it, because i bet my life i saw it RIGHT!

    • if you have questions and think i might help you, just write them down

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