Okay, here we go, I have literally been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years now and I try to refrain from flirting or anything adulterous even if it is innocent. I have literally became a rock to other people; emotionless, non talking, etc. So, My girlfriend plays an online game and meets these guys she adds on skype. She uses them and what not for stuff and goodies on the online game. When she is not playing the game, she is either: talking to them on Skype or sleeping. I am always busy with college or work, so I rarely have time to talk to her. We do see each other a lot and go out to eat sometimes. I buy her things and try to be a good boyfriend. I love her sincerely and honestly but she has double standards for me not to talk to other girls, even if I am not really attractive to them, which takes my free will away. Anyways, I have spied on her laptop and opened up her Skype to see if anything has gotten serious... it most definitively has. One guy, named Marcus, has the hots for her and I don't know if she has the hots from him, but she continously talks to him and messages him "Im lonely", "bootyhole >:I", and whatnot. Is this a red flag? I am scared to know if it is or not because I put all my spare time into her. She complains about me not giving her enough attention, not cuddling with her when I get off from work (when she is over at my parents house) because I have to go straight to the books, and etc. I feel like I am not enough in her eyes and I feel like foul play is at afoot. What do I do? Do I demand fairness in our relationship? I have confronted her about it and she says: It isn't serious, you don't trust me, blah blah blah. Someone please help me here, I have bought her a pre-engagement ring and everything and she still TALKS TO THEM!
Important thing is to remember to never give up on someone that is important to you.
Most Helpful Girl
Whoa, there's so much double standards going on here it's shocking.
First of all, your girlfriend is being extremely hypocritical by talking to guys while she expects you to refrain from talking to girls. Judging from what you said, I can say one thing: I would be worried. Definitely a red flag. And let me tell you something else- I'm a girl so I know how the game works... and trust me, it really doesn't seem like this is gonna stay innocent for long. Messages like "I'm lonely," as well as "excessive" messages = inclination towards the other person. And I speak from experience, because I can say for a fact tht I wouldn't be messaging a guy most of the time and telling him "I'm lonely" if things were innocent. Nope... not innocent at all. In fact, this happened to me before, and it was bc I was extremely attracted to him- and I wanted things to go further. If the messages were less often, it would be slightly more understandable. I wouldn't buy into that game.
Talk to her and make your point straight- there shouldn't be any double standards in the relationship. If you disapprove of her talking to so many guys as well as the "excessive" messaging, you need to make that clear to her. Yea, you have a right to be concerned. And the whole "you dont trust me" statement she made is simply "guilt-tripping." People only make that statement in an effort to guilt the other into thinking they said something wrong. No, you're not wrong to be concerned. And you've done everything for her, you dont even talk to girls, all for her... it's not true that you're not "good enough." If that was the case then all those awesome guys out there would never get cheated on.
Of course, if she cares about how you feel then she will listen and give heed to your concern. Hopefully things work out for you guys. Wishing the best, sincere advice :) xx2
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