Parents..divorce...fucked up family?

Okay so at the end of last year my mom told me that my dad want a divorce because "i suck and he has given up on me and this family" im the only child. So my mom said that i need to start improving to prevent the divorce. So i did try to improve but honestly i only did it for my mom cause she said she still wanted to remain with my dad. I really dont give a fuck about my dad and i have thought their relationship was dead since i was 10. My dad sucks. I found out he watched p*rn when i was 11. He only cares about my grades which is the reason he wanted the divorce. But my grades are fine, i got top 5 in my exams and got in the top school in my country. So obviously my grades slipped cause the competition is tough. And then out of the blue he blames me. I asked my mom whether there were other reasons but she refused to tell. So i went by elimination. Its not about money so its about feelings. Then she said she got hurt more than my dad in this problem but she won't tell me untill im 18. So my first guess was that he cheated. But now after 6+ months of pretending to be normal i really think one day this *problem* will arise again. Now my dad has lost his job so he stays at home watching god knows what on the computer. We ignore each mostly but lately he has been getting so annoying. He always talks to me like he's irritated even though i didn't do anything. We have never been close. Lately my mom has been asking me if he had gone anywhere while he was supposed to be at home so i suspect something. Anyway i hate him and i wish they divorced last year. I know i sound really selfish and bad but i just hate him so much now. he's at home 24/7 and i can't do my own thing in peace. But now i think of it i was always pretty emotionless. I didn't care when my grandfather died.I simply wasn't close to him. So when i got the news i was just like oh okay he died. But i do miss him a bit though. Same with my great grandma. So am i heartless and whats the deal with my parents?
  • I am heartless
    Vote A
  • I am not heartless
    Vote B
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My dad has no social life, all his bosses hate him, he only has friends from university.
Ugh and i am really confused on whether he's cheating or not. It seems like he is but i went through his messages and all the contacts names sound like guys


Most Helpful Girl

  • I don't think you did anything wrong. You're absolutely not the reason why they're having issues, they're simply too immature and scared to say what the actual problem is.

    I also grew up with pretty bad parents (dad was a complete ass and my mom is cold and closed off) At one point I just decided to worry about myself and do what I needed to keep myself healthy and happy. At the end of the day you can't fix their issues, you can only fix your own. Since you're getting good grades, try to go to college on a scholarship, get a job (if you don't already have one) and make a life for yourself there.

    you seem like a smart sensible person, don't let others (even your parents) drag you down or make you doubt yourself


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What Guys Said 1

  • Their problems are not your fault, honestly they sound crazy and you should get a job or stay at a friends most of the time,


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