He cheated on me, what do I do?

I just find out my husband cheated on me, he had sex with a friend of mine and after 3 months she finally told me. I'm 24 and he's 25 and we've been together since high school. We got married almost a year ago. I confronted him about the whole situation and he started apologizing and crying. I'm really at a lost of what to do. I love him and I thought he loved me but if you love someone you wouldn't want to be with someone else. I've been sleeping at a hotel since I found out a couple days ago and he's blowing up my phone. I feel so stupid. Do you think I should leave him or give him another chance?

Updates:
Thank you all so much for your help... I've decided to leave him because what he did is not fixable & the trust is now completely broken. As for my "friend", she is cut out of my life. But, thank you all again for your wonderful advice & God Bless!

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Too often this happens with someone you both know. It would be easier if it was someone you didn't know. You've been betrayed by 2 people, and you don't know who is more at fault.

    It can be fixable, but it depends on how likely he is to ever do this again. Only you and him can figure that out. If you leave him and find someone else, you probably have the same 50/50 chance with the next man.

    I don't think your friend did you any favours. She must have given him some encouragement, and known how much this could hurt you. They usually confess only to ease their own conscience. It makes them feel better, but makes you feel worse when you find out.

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What Guys Said 8

  • If he cheated on you within a year of marrying you then he doesn't deserve another chance , neither does she.

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  • You shouldn't waste any time in that relationship after he cheated on you. You are between 18-24 and you don't wanna be in your fifties and regret that you didn't leave him. He may not cheat on you again but if he truly loved you he wouldn't do that to you.

    It may be hard now but remember that you only have one life so don't settle with him, settle with someone better. He will come one day.
    But you got to move on.

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  • You get a lawyer and get a divorce.

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  • did u actually catch him in the act your friend she's trying to ruin what you have. don't believe her listen to your husband and for him apologising maybe u cameout to strong on him we men do that even when you're wrong just to lwt you cool off and later have a real and calm conversation talk to your man don't let that home breaker ruin your love

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  • u ask yourself if its worth it, and if you can continue to trust him. if u cant, you ask yourself if you can live without him, if u can, you move on

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  • You should walk away and never look back. You deserve better: that or have an open relationship. Though chances are he wouldn't be cool with the idea of another guy plowing you: double standards...

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  • Trust your mind to tell you what to do. You know best, deep down...

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  • I can't make your mind up for you, but I honestly could never forgive a woman if she cheated on me, I'd seek a divorce without any hestitation. You are 24, don't waste your life and a marriage with someone who does not even respect you or the vow he made to you at your wedding.

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What Girls Said 7

  • I think you should leave him. If he did it once, he'll do it again. You're still young, you have your whole life ahead of you, don't stay with someone who treats you this way. You shouldn't stay with someone who doesn't respect you or doesn't care for you (because let's face it, if he did, he never would have cheated in the fist place). If you did stay with him, his infidelity would always be in the back of your mind.

    On the other hand, I do not know him personally. You are the only one who truly knows him. He may change but in my experience, most cheaters don't just cheat one time. I don't want to tell you what to do because, after all, it's your life. I'm just trying to offer you my own insight into your situation.

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  • Only you can really answer this question, unfortunately : /

    If it were me, I would be inclined to end it. There's always the possibility of therapy for him and as a couple if he's truly remorseful and never wants to do it again. But, there's also the issue of trust that, once broken, you may not be able to mend.

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  • I don't think it's worth forgiving him nor your so called "friend". They betrayed you and stabbed you on the back. Just no.

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  • Like other people said... only you can really make this decision... I can only say what I would do... I'm in a relationship and love my BF very much. However, I have a zero tolerance policy on cheating. It's something I take very seriously and no doubt I would leave. There is no way I'd waste my time with someone that obviously doesn't care too much about me. You're right... if he truly loved you he wouldn't have done that. And with your friend too? That's a slap in the face. I wouldn't even give him the chance to explain because he may try to convince you or give you some type of sob story to manipulate you... I'd move on and find someone else... there are a lot of other men out there who won't cheat. The thing that really stands out here is that he didn't even tell you... and he probably had no intention to. He did it once, there is an extremely high chance he'll do it again but just cover his tracks better. He's just sorry he got caught.

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  • leave him!

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  • By my own experience all i can say is you will never forgive him or forget, your relationship will never be the same, all is lost. Move on!

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  • Try to work through your marriage.
    Give it some space and really think things out.

    It's possible that people can say, but they have to want that.

    If you give in too easily he may do it again.
    Stand your ground! and distance yourself for a while.
    You have every right to.

    Seek marriage counseling if you can.

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