I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years, 2 months ago because I was feeling very depressed and stressed out with my job, I didn't want to drag him into my drama and ask for a break so I could have some space and time to think about my career. For 2 months he begged for me back, saying he was ready to start his life with me and he didn't want to be with anyone else, he even went to my parents and asked then what he could do to win me back... I kept telling him that I still loved him but I need time alone. After six weeks and talking with family members and a therapist, I message him say I would like to give us another try. He's response shocked me as he said I can't right now. I later found out that he was 'talking' to a new girl... how could he go for loving me so much to blowing me off for some girl he just met? After a week had past and I apologies for putting him through so much pain he kept telling me 'I can't right now' ... Although when I text him he was always available to help me out whenever I needed it, until I suddenly got a text yesterday saying leave me alone and I haven't heard from him since, which I so confusing to be as he told me two days before that he was still in love with me but couldn't be with me right now... Just to add to it he never used to post anything on Facebook and now he keeps posting status about this new girl... I don't know if he's just happy or trying to rub it in my face... I really want to know what to do, obviously this girl was a rebound to void the pain he was feeling but do you think he's really over us? Should I wait for him or move on? Help!!
Most Helpful Guy
For starters, "I was feeling very depressed and stressed out with my job..."
See, this is part of why men do not prefer women with stressful careers.
Second. Your boyfriend was with you four years? You realize that's a long, long while for dating, right? That's literally like a marriage. And then you broke up with him, and he spent two months sacrificing all his dignity, pouring out his broken heart to you "begged for me back, saying he was ready to start his life with me and didn't want anyone else." And you ditched him because you were depressed and didn't want to deal with him.
Why on earth would he want you back? It sounds like he was trying to get you back, brokenhearted, for two months, then there was a six week or something period of not so much?
He's had some time to recover, realize you broke his heart for no reason and have issues, and he's decided to find a girl who hopefully won't break his heart for no reason. I hate to restate what most of us know, but you realize that getting ditched by someone you love hurts? Literally, it hurts like a concussion, and effects neural pathways in the brain that were changed and rewritten during the relationship.
He might also now have had time to think, talk to buddies, and realize, "Damn! I wanted to have a life with this girl? What if we were married with kids and she had an episode like this?"1