Moody Boyfriend says he loves me but goes MIA a lot?

What is he doing here? We've been dating for a few years btw.

Is he trying to get me to leave like I'm the bad person or something?

He tells me how much he loves me and lately he's been telling me how pretty I am. Yet he gets so moody. Example being we had plans yesterday (Wednesday) after work and he just read my msg's all day (iPhones have read scripts) and when I was where he said he'd pick me up, he never came. I got a call about an hour later of him saying he had a bad day, got in a fight with his dad. But he is 24! He's so immature to me at this point.

Then after when I told him stop with the excuses, he kept giving them, not apologizing once, just tryin to justify his actions. He kept trying to pick fights with me, but I told him id call him when I get home as I don't want to speak about our relationship in public.

He kept being really negative saying I'm messing things up and treating him like I don't care. Then he wouldn't pick up my calls all night and read my msg's at 4 in the morning.

I don't get it, maybe someone could enlighten me, I have my suspicions he just wants me for sex, is possessive and possibly mentally ill

by the way he has a drug problem. Mostly weed (which I don't mind so much cos come on..) and coke/prescription drugs.

I'm angry at him he started doing drugs again because that was his excuse for cheating on me a couple months ago.


Most Helpful Guy

  • For one, probably not using you for sex. That sounds like it's in your head to me.

    Two, yes he may have some issues. I can labeled as having Borderline personality disorder, I have anxiety issues up the whazoo, and at times show symptoms of schizo. So I can too go from moods of love to moods of complete isolation from said person that I love. Some people handle their feelings really badly, I honestly think I handle my own overall fairly well. His drug issues don't help him when looking at mental issues, because they have a common tie, for example I drink a lot.

    Feelings of extreme hot to extreme cold can be a sign of BPD (borderline personality disorder). It's an intense fear of abandonment, although that isn't all of it, that's a lot of it. It can be clear you care, but in his head he can find reasons why you don't. You said he had a fight was his dad. Shitty childhood can be a possible cause of BPD (which was a large contributor to mine I believe). People with BPD are also likely cheat, so that's not surprising.

    If he has this issue, he himself has to recognize and aim to seek help. There is little you can do aside from making sure he does that.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I'm in the same boat with you. my bf doesn't even tell me he loves me we've been dating for almost 7 years not to mention he doesn't come home til really late and just over the weekend he didn't come home for two days and went a while 24 hours without saying anything to me. i was freaking out.. anyways i talked with him and things are "alright" now. guys are really weird I don't know i feel like most of them are all the same they are really dismissive of their gfs and lack appreciation for us. Maybe we're just dating the wrong guys... and the whole drug thing i agree with you weed is what ever nbd but like the coke and prescriptions those are going to alter moods. I think my bf is doing it even though he swore to me he wasn't and i also told him if i find out he is im breaking up with him 7 years or not. I see what that shit does to people and i don't want a part of it. but ultimately you need to step back from your relationship and decide if its worth pursuing. I mean if it wasn't for certain elements in my relationship this would of ended a long time ago sad truth. They are always going to come up with some excuse to prove they are right or what ever... fact is it's all excuses they can't be honest and tell the truth... but just really think about it is it worth it or not


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What Guys Said 2

  • When you grow up as a child with not much of a choice and you live in an environment that is filled with drugs and bad influences, that's one thing. When you choose to live in that world, that's a completely different thing. Anger can be caused by many different things, one of which is drug use. Indifference towards another person could be another cause of his anger and ill treatment. Either way I would run, both circumstances will lead to you getting the short end of the stick.

  • I'm like that too, I feel like if I'm around someone for too long they'll get annoyed at me, and start hating me, so I hang out with different people every few days.


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