I totally messed up somebody help me?

My ex broke up with me about 2 weeks ago because he saw random guys on my. phone and assumed the worst in me... he doesn't trust me now... as I read my. old txts I now realize Everytime he tried to make the effort to spend time with me I kind of pushed away due to my own insecurities, I had trust issues and Cldnt believe a guy like that really liked me (he's those type to open your door, bring flowers just bcuz) etc... well we broke up and now I miss him sooo much.. we've hung out before after the breakup (I asked to hangout) and we've hugged and kissed at the end of the night but when I ask the next day or another day he gets mad and says he doesn't want to talk about it that him and so can only be friends and maybe in the future we can be more.. he's told me im never going to change, he's told me before to give him his space and not push him away.. how do I show him when he doesn't allow himself to see... I've told him I'll get it for you.. he says you dnt have to do that I'll say "I know I want to".. how do I show him I love him without being smothering? Today (we work together) he told me "your hair looks nice today" and smiled... I wish he cld just spend time with me but if I do I dnt want to pressure him.. he's been really stressed with his job as well.. please help


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The age old proverb applies... “If you love somebody, let them go. If they return, they were always yours. If they don't, they never were.”

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    • I believe that's true... but this isn't the first time we've broken up and he's told me before its hurt him when I wldnt even try to win him back.. well now im trying so hard and its like he's mad at me doesn't believe me... but the fact he has kissed me etc.. like today he asked me to check something above the shelf when I turned around he came. from my back and hugged me. I didn't say anything because I didn't want to ask why.. maybe I wldve turned around and given him a hug back but I guess I was shocked

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    • Do you think he has feelings for me? Why can't he talk about it? And yeah I dnt want to smother him and I think I have.. so giving him space is so hard because my biggest fear is him leaving me little by little each day I give him his freedom

    • He is not a possession, you try to own him and you will lose him.

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • you should tell him about how insecure you felt when you two were in a relationship together. you should told him that a long time ago so he could understand where he stood with you. right now, you need to get your feelings for him cleared up before you can think clearly and know where to start from with this guy. let him know hat you will wait for him, let him know how much you love him. hiding it doesn't really help, believe me. if he knows how you feel then, maybe he will reconsider or soften up a bit.
    Tokomo :)

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    • I've tried to explain why I did what I did but asa I start start talking about it.. he tells me "I already told you I dnt want to talk about this right now" so I cnt explain anything (he gets upset) he's told me. before im sorry" I cnt. give you what you want at this time" yet, yest at work he car. from behind and gave me a hug when I didn't expect it.. but later on I texted him I had found my debit card because I asked him to check if he didn't have it since we had lunch together) and he didn't respond like "that's great" nothing.. so will see what he says today.. I know. space. is what he needs right now but its hard to just sit around and wait.. I have no idea whats going on

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    • I just dnt understand if he still has feelings for me why keep. putting me through this.. apart of me wants to send him sorry. cards, do other things but than I dnt want to push him away

    • You need to understand that this guy is not a possession okay. You need to give him space to breathe and think. If you continuously shove your feelings at him, even in the slightest way, he will get aggravated. Men are like that. You just have to understand that sometime you hve to suppress your love sometimes, even if if feels like it is going to kill you. If he needs space then you need to give him space.

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