Would you date someone that has almost no dating history and has been single for 5 years?

My ex boyfriend wants to be a firefighter. We're both 20 and 21. Good kids overall. I knew that he wanted to be a firefighter and all and that he wasn't going to be a firefighter until 5-6 years from now. Everything was going fine in our relationship. To be honest i didn't think we were going to break up. If anything i thought we were going to break up because EMTs hardly get to see their girlfriends.

(He has to be an EMT then paramedic then firefighter.) Well in the beginning of the year he broke up with me saying that he didn't wanna be in a relationship until 5 years from now when he becomes one and there's no talking him out of it, I've tried my hardest to talk him out of it. No dates or anything. That's the story he's telling everyone including his mom. I knew what i was getting myself into with his career and everything but now he says he wants to be single for 5 years.

I was his first real girlfriend. We only lasted a year. And he had little high school relationships that didn't mean anything to him. I was the only girl he had feelings for.

Would you date someone that, lets say, years into the future would barely have any dating experience?

I would thing that the smart thing to do would be to keep someone that knows what your career will be like in the future so then 5 years from now when you have a stressful job like that, you would know that your significant other has your back. Right? :(
Updates:
5 years from now, people will settle down. I don't think someone will want to barely start dating 5 years from now. it sounds like a ridiculous idea to me :/

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Yea I think a lot of people would date someone like that and not really care, some would see it as a bonus. That being said, him blowing you off to be single for 5 years is just a bad decision. I hope you try to talk him out of it more and he folds, but if you can't I'd just move on and let him make the mistake -- blowing 5 years of his life that he could've spent with a girl he loves.

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    • I think i do have to move on. I've tried and tried to talk him out of it and it's always the same story. And it's so sad because i know so much about his career that if i really wanted to, i think i could be a firefighter as well! :(

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    • Yeah and I'm a really sweet, smart girl with a good head on my shoulders. Loyal and everything. I was the girl that he 'hoped and prayed' for. I told him over and over 'you're not gonna find another girl like me especially 5 years from now.'

      And to that he said 'then I'll just have to suffer the consequences'

      :/

    • He probably won't ever find another, and he'll probably regret it his entire life. But all you can do is give him a chance, it's not your fault if he throws it away.

Most Helpful Girl

  • I would date someone like that.

    However, he doesn't want to be tied down. That means that you be single. I'm sorry. It'd be mean of him to keep a girl around when he doesn't want to be in a relationship, ya know?

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What Guys Said 6

  • I think he don't like to divert his mind to any relation for sometime. If once he reached his aim definitely he will love u more than now. don't believe any stupid words. be confident on it.

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  • I am so sorry to hear this :(.

    in my opinion what he has done is just so wrong, and selfish. As for staying friends I think it would be to difficult for me. If I did agree at first. I would be a "distant" friend. Contact about every 2 - 3 months. Maybe less. But eventually I think even that would stop.

    I wouldn't wait around for him. If there are opportunities for dates/possible relationships. explore them.

    Who knows if you're both single in 5 years... maybe things could be rekindled if you both desired. Unfortunately I think it's time to move on. :(

    As for dating someone who is inexperienced. That wouldn't bother me. We're all that way at one point

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  • I'd be a hypocrite if I wouldn't.

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  • Hi, I would. And I have been single for the last 24 years of my life.

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  • Sounds to me like he's being stupid and childish. Not sure why though, very odd behavior.

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    • Yup! everything was going fine and then he drops a bomb on me saying that he doesn't wanna be in a relationship until 5 years from now. His mom tried and tried again to talk him out of it and he told her the same thing :/

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    • Yeah and I'm a really sweet, smart girl with a good head on my shoulders. Loyal and everything. I was the girl that he 'hoped and prayed' for. I told him over and over 'you're not gonna find another girl like me especially 5 years from now.'

      And to that he said 'then I'll just have to suffer the consequences'

    • Yep, forget him. He's being crazy lame. Doesn't properly value you. If you stuck around anyway and kept trying he'd probably just value/respect you even less so it's a waste of your time.

What Girls Said 1

  • That is not a problem For me

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    • Why do you say that? Just curious :)

    • Just because someone is inexperienced doesn't mean anything.

    • I guess you're right about that, thanks for responding :)

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