Girlfiend broke up with me three weeks ago! But she asked me when she did if she sees us together in the future! Please help :(?

My girlfriend of eight months broke up with me three weeks ago! I kinda new in the back of my mind it was coming. I gave her everything and was always there for her like a boyfriend should be. Before she did she asked for some space for a week to figure things out. We talked a little during that time. On the last day she called me saying we need to break up, I haven't been happy for two months now. She said she lost excitement, that she wants to party, have fun with her friends, and not feel tied down. She was crying pretty hard over the phone, she wouldn't let me tell her one last time what she meant to me. I took the breakup pretty good Becuase I did not want to show her I was hurting inside. She then asked me on the phone " DO YOU EVER SEE US TOGEHTER AGAIN IN THE FUTURE " ? I told her I don't know Becuase I need space now. Give me a text when you figure things out and we will go from there. I then ended up telling her I do see us getting back together in the future Becuase after two years of talking and chasing each other you can't throw that away. She text me a week ago saying I hope you had a good days off. I text her back two days later saying thanks and I hope you had a good weekend. Ever since my last text to her I haven't heard from her. I'm just wondering of I have a chance with her still or is it done. Also what should I do and if you know what she's thinking. Any advice would be great for me right now. Thankyou so much for the replies I can't thank you guys/ girls enough!! :)

Updates:
I haven't heard from her in three weeks now, we are still friends on Facebook and Instagram and we both still have photos of each other when we were in our relationship up. I also noticed on her snapchat that she is constantly snap chatting guysallot
Before we started dating a friend of here told me about my ex that when she gets out of a relationship she sleeps with a lot of guys to try and forget about them as fast as possible :(

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Most Helpful Girl

  • Alright... sounds like you two have been together for a good amount of time, two years shows that you can make things work for that long. HOWEVER< from a girls stand point she broke up with you, you said that she wants to hang out and party and have fun and not be tied down... it's kind of like the classic, The lawns always greener on the other side, the reason your lawn ain't green is because you aren't watering it right... to be honest I think that it's her loss, break ups seriously hurt but the point is that they take time, the fact that she asked if you ever saw a future again with her is letting her know that she will always have you to jump back to at any moment, in relationships it's not supposed to be like that, you're basically letting her know that she can do her thing and have fun maybe date around but there's a pretty good chance that you'll be up to give it another go you know? And there's nothing wrong with that at all, but its kind of like you wouldn't leave the door cracked open in the winter right? (Sorry, weird analogies or whatever haha) I'm glad that you told her you need space, but you need to let her come back to you, she broke up with you which shows that you were MORE into her than she was into you, does that make sense? By showing that you're not going to be available it;ll show strength on your part, don't text her at all, I'd write her number down and put it somewhere safe in your room, then delete it off your phone so that if you get the urge to text her, you'll have to really think about it first. (this worked for me in one situation). In my honest opinion, if you really want her back you have to let her do the groveling and the beckoning, she needs to show YOU that she wants you just as bad, sometimes it helps to just take the positives and negatives out of the relationship, for example, what did you like and what did you dislike? Sometimes those can help put things into perspective as well. Let her come to you though.

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    • Thankyou so much for the advice! That's what I have been doing. I haven't text her or call her since the breakup except when she text me that short little one. I haven't heard from her since not had she heard from me. I've been trying to get over her, as I think she had already gotten over me since she hasn't contacted me since. Thankyou so much again!

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 8

  • Sounds like your ex doesn't know what she wants. One day she'll want you next day she'll want her independence. Course you still have a chance with her but think about it bud. The reason she's asking you if you see you two again in the future is because she thinks she'll have some sense of security if you say yes and basically a free card to get back in your head once she's done having fun. Now here's my advice based on personal experience: don't get back with her. She seems like the type of person who will continually do this again and you don't deserve that kind of crap in your life right now. Just focus on you and leave her alone, you know don't text back or answer her calls, not only do you need space but she does too. Then gradually be friends again and see where it goes. It sounds like she's smothering you to respond to her, just chill and do you. Give yourself like a week not talking to her and see what you think after.

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    • It's been three weeks now, I haven't heard a word from her. I think your completely right. She wants to feel like she still has me when she is out partying away and sleeping with other guys and when she's done come back to me. I've realized in my time that I do not want her back now after all of this. I'm still friends with her on Facebook. Should I delete her?

    • Based on personal experience: I still had an ex as a Facebook friend. Turns out it wasn't a good idea to hold onto that type of stuff so I deleted my old Facebook and made a new one. You do whats right for you. If you're okay with seeing her online then keep her, if you're completely through with her or just need that space away then delete her. Or block her either way she will get the message.

  • I think you'd have a chance at getting back together once she wants to settle down, the only problem is, who knows when the heck that times gonna come around. For right now i would just keep her in the back of your mind until she contacts you again wanting to start over. Until this opportunity presents itself I would move on and use my time to make myself happy.

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  • She wants to do what she wants and still have you waiting for her.
    So basically she wants everything to be on her terms. Those kind of relationships are the worst because they often end up becoming one sided with you putting in all the effort and her just going off and doing her own thing.
    I think you need to take this break up as fresh start. Don't take what she says too seriously, especially seeing as you've not heard from her; and use this time to get over her.
    In time you will find someone who will want ALL of you and will always be excited to see you and hear from you everyday, instead of jumping back and forth like a yo-yo.

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  • You guys deep down love eachother. Go for it again. What is meant to be will be.. call her right NOW and tell her how much you adore her that she's your baby and all these cute things. Take her on a date and talk about things. Give eachother another chance. Itll be worth it. :) goodluck hun

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  • If she loved u in the first place she wouldn't have broken up with u just move on and Ik it's not that easy but try k?

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    • I think your right about this one. I feel like I've been played and used and if she really wanted to be with me she would talk it through and not just run when she wants to have fun and party

  • hmm (you just replied to my qestion and i told me to read yours ahha).

    well, if you both were chasing each other for that amoutn of time, it is a bit rough to just chuck it all away. there's always the 'there are other fishes in the sea' . to me, she sounds confused. she says she wants to party but then asks 'do you ever see us together again in the future', when a girl asks this, she obviously wants to hear 'yes' so therefore to me, she does want you back in the future, but doesn't at the same time.

    i think give her some space now, (like i did with my ex), maybe dont talk to her for a bit (eg 30 day no contact-it works miracles haha). and after this time, see how YOU'RE feeling and focus on YOURSELF. dont focus on her. make sure you are happy first. also, dont text her now, let her come to you. the worst thing is when someone doesn't reply (angers me haha).

    also make sure she doesn't use you as a rebound, or holding onto you so if something doesn't work out she has you to fall back on.

    you even said at the back of your mind, you knew it was coming. i think it was a sign 'the universe is doing you a favour', it all depends on what YOU want. focus on yourself. always put your happiness first. this is what i told my ex, im like alright you're breaking up with me fair enough, you put your happiness first. so yeah im sure you'll sort it out. im sorry to hear this though.

    ps sorry if i dont make sense, i hope i do my brain isn't working after all this study load hahah

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    • Thankyou for the response and yes I will not contact her :)

  • She still seems like she doesn't know what she wants so I wldnt force it on her because that might push her away but I wld still text her here n there.. good morning etc just so she knows your still thinking of her

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  • She broke up with you no matter the reason she did it, and if she comes back she comes back but you have to really think about if you want to be waiting around for the next time she rethinks the breakup. You clearly had strong feelings for her, but now you have to be strong and give yourself time to deal and move on with out her because she isn't waiting around for you.
    Don't be the first to reach out to her, if she texts you or whatever just let her but you said you needed space so she should give you that.

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What Guys Said 1

  • I know it sucks man but you'll get through this. Take care of yourself and be happy. I'm going through the same thing and my ex behaves the same after a breakup as well. Best breakup movie is Swingers for sure, the minute you've moved on and are happy she'll show up again

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    • Thanks for the advice man! It just sucks knowing that she's out there sleeping with a bunch of guys now trying to get over me as fast as possible. And even worse when she dosent feel like she wants anything to do with you ever again.

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    • To be honest I did the night we broke up, it wasn't a back stabbing thing. She changed her profile pic of us and status before I even left the bar.

      I did it so I wouldn't see her in my newsfeed, and end up wondering and hurting myself more. We both still have our profile pics up though, the choice is yours but that's what I did. It also makes it harder for her to stalk you.

    • By that I meant all the pics of us, my phone had a brain Fart lol

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