Should you be loyal to a woman who is with you based on your future career prospects, can she be loyal if this is all she wants from me?

Ok so i'm 21 me and my girlfriend had been together for a year when she dumped me based on the fact she thought i lacked ambition we are both and university and i am studying law i am in my first year. Over here in the UK the first year doesn't count towards the degree you just have to pass, admittedly i have failed a couple exams and had to resit due to not being focused and motivated 100% of the time she on the other hand is super motivated and driven and all she talks about is getting into her dream career i'm more laid back.

Eventhough i have failed some exams i plan to work hard to pass them and progress to 2nd year and as 2nd year actually counts to my end degree grade i plan to work extremely hard to achieve top marks, i am an A grade student in everything i previously have done education wise so i believe i have the potential to do this.

Anyway my gf dumped me because i lacked ambition and because she believed i wouldn't be sucessful enough for her, she dumped me after a year of us being together. We got back together months later and then dumped me again after a month, remained friends and now after a month of being back together the same issues return.

We have been so happy this past month it's been amazing but yesterday she had an outburst saying i bring her down, how if i am not sucessful she won't be with me, why does she deserve to be with someone like me as she worked hard to be sucessful etc. Told me how her mum and friends think i am a bum and a waste of space and she could do better but she's with me based on the condition i change and become a driven career focused person.

Anyway i'm actually glad she said all this, i mean she's broken up with me 2 times already this time i started falling into the were so in love trap, but i realise now she doesn't really care about me, she just see's me as a future paycheck so i'm just going to enjoy my time with her and not get emotionally involved so when it's over i won't be hurt... CONTINUED..

Updates:
.. She is loyal has never cheated etc and so am i but is her telling me there are guys out there better than me that she could get with being loyal. I would never cheat but i feel like i'm getting played anyway she says she feels trapped by me...
... She told me even when we broke up the first time she was sad but she felt free that she could find someone better than me, when she's with me she feels trapped by me and our relationship is this loyalty, loyalty isn't just not cheating or is it?

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Most Helpful Girl

  • how is she a gold digger who sees you as a future check when she is doing the same thing as you are, and doing a better job at it? she's busting her ass in school and doing what she needs to do to be successful so why can't you? law school is very hard but if she can succeed she wants to be able to look at her man and see he;s doing the same thing.. but you aren't. you keep saying "you plan" but your pasts efforts have shown that you have been complacent and failing in your grades. perhaps she's looking in the long run and sees someone who could turn into a failure if he doesn't get it together and find some motivation. I don't think she's wrong for not wanting a guy who seems to be coasting by like his future doesn't matter

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What Girls Said 1

  • Cut her loose. You seem to be working very hard in your law course and she doesn't seem to see the effort you put in nor give you any support. She is seriously not acknowledging the effort you're putting in for your future and she's not praising you for it either. I bet as soon as she comes across someone who she thinks is better than you then I have a feeling she would leave you that very second. Cut her loose before she cuts you.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Of course not. If you are honest with yourself, you should realize that she is settling, and so are you. I suggest that you do both of you the honor by ending the relationship with great immediacy.

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  • Stay away fron her, you should want someone who wants you. Not what you have.

    You shouldn't go for girls who say stuff like the last bit. If some girl said that to me then I would just cut her out of my life , no friends or anything.

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  • She is nothing but a gold digger. Cut her from your life.

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