Should I tell him I want to break up since I know things will get tough with our schedules in the fall?

We've been together for just under a year. Things are going really good and we have a lot of fun together.

However, both of us are going to take a lot of classes in fall semester. He takes his studies very seriously, and even got a part time job at the school. Recently he just got an offer to become a manger of a store, which he is going to take as a job too.

I'm glad he got all these great things going for him. However, even during this past school year when he was busy with just school and no jobs, I felt pretty stressed as I felt like he wasn't into me at all. He assures me that he was and just is trying to get good grades, but regardless it makes me feel super stressed.

I'm thinking that considering next semester not only will he be super busy but I will be as well, making it nearly impossible to coordinate our schedules, it may be better to just break it off in advance. Sort of quick & painless.

Thoughts on what I should do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Or you could simply work on it.

    It sounds to me like you probably didn't have a lot going on last semester, so you felt like you should be giving more to the relationship, while he was stressed with working hard.
    This year it sounds like you'll have something to do that could take your mind off that and it'll give you an idea of what was actually going through his head last semester.

    If you really like him, don't let something as small as your schedule ruin the relationship for you. Just be secure about you and him. The only thing right now that's threatening to come between the two of you right now is yourself as far as you know. Just try to be happy. So long as he's a good guy and treats you right, and you actually do like him/are attracted to him, no reason why you shouldn't just try to make it work despite your schedules. :)

    • aw thank-you! Everything you said was pretty spot on, especially that my last semester was pretty slack while his was super busy&demanding.

      He said he will make time to see me still so I guess it's good that it at least seems like he'll make the effort! :)

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What Guys Said 2

  • Confront him and reason with him, if he's willing to change, give it a chance - a relationship just under a year is a lot of time and commitment to be merely dismissed with a waive of a hand. Next, if he should turn out aggressive and unreasonable, then leave him right away and don't listen to the rest of what he has to say if it is intended with maleficence.

    • Agreed!:) Go with this answer, girl! :) Try to make it work if you're happy together.

    • Yea just an hour or so ago I was with him and he asked me to help him memorize some terms for the new job, which I agreed to and ran through them with him. He asked me again to go through the terms with him to which I jokingly said no, and he asked me why I'm not happy about his job, and that I never support him. I said I do support him, but that doesn't necessarily mean that I am happy about it.

      I already told him a few days ago that it doesn't bode well for our relationship with the time constraints and such to which he said of course he'll make time for me. I know that probably won't happen though, as I saw how busy he was with 4 courses this semester, without 2 jobs in addition like will be come September!

    • I get it now, you want to enjoy Summer with someone, and he isn't there for you. That's very tough. Yeah, first give him the talk, but I think that's quite sad, it's as if you're not even in a relationship at all.

  • Relationships are meant to be worked out until there is no chance whatsoever. You don't just drop it cause things are tough. Life will be tough if marriage were to happen. That's just life. Work with him for a while.

    • I know, of course I will more than likely stay with him. It's just hard because my last boyfriend cheated on me after slowly hanging out/staying in contact with me less and less so I suppose I'm a little sensitive when it comes to that. Almost paranoid?

      Would it be a good idea if I tell him I'm sorry if I come across as if I don't care when in reality I care a lot, and am simply worried that history will repeat itself?

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